Does Our Depression Come From Feeling Unloved / Shame ?

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I don't need anyone to listen. Even if they did they couldn't do anything. I just have to get out of here.

I would certainly seek a more supportive, or anyway less rejecting, environment.

It never goes away, but it does abate somewhat if one is surrounded by a few more-than-half accepting souls.

The happiest years of my life have been the times in which I was accepted into the company of other misfits.

As far as exclusion and rejection (an ultimately suicide) of the "different" being favored by natural selection...

It is, and it isn't. It is certainly the way we are "hardwired" to behave; as such, it probably does have a role to play in the natural weeding out of weak elements. HOWEVER. Whether ASD, ADHD, or some other condition, quite a lot of our evolution has been driven by the "clinically odd" and other "undesirable elements." I'm not saying that we're invariably the Einsteins and Edisons and et cetera; obviously we're not. I know a lot of ASDers and ADHDers and there's not a genius in the lot...

...but there are a lot of people who display, very strongly, skills that are necessary to the functioning of things like an extended family unit, a community, or a society. If I had to handpick a group of people to face "The End of the World As We Know It," almost every member of the group I would assemble would be ASD, ADHD, schizoid, OCD, or something. Not just because those are most of the people I care for, but because I think I'd be most likely to have assembled the blend of complimentary skills, traits, attributes, (and yes, weaknesses) that would make us most likely to survive. [humor]At least, if we could keep from killing each other. [/humor]

I guess I'm saying that, while being outside the mainstream is disfavored, H. sapiens is basically cutting off its own nose to spite its face by doing so. Because a population with a low degree of diversity (be that in skills and attributes or the genetics that underlie them) tends to be a population in decline. Even if it's doing very well at present, it is a population that is unlikely to possess the adaptability necessary to pull through a bottleneck event-- and there is ALWAYS another bottleneck event out there.

Right. I am scared too!
I'm scared being stuck in a world where I'm alien and people around me can't seem to understand me, aren't interested, and not very accepting of the differences.

But imagine some environment where maybe some of us here worked at a job together where our strengths were utilized fully, and we were accepting of each other's differences, and above all could communicate rather effectively with each other.

There are times when I post something "unusual" here and some of you have no trouble understanding what I'm trying to communicate. That pretty much never happens in my real-life environment. I often get looks like "what planet are you from?", or "alrightly then, I'll just be going now".

Bluntly, what some of you perceive as brilliant observation is perceived by many ordinary people as schizoid delusion.
And yes, that is a depressing environment.
When the majority reject us, then we naturally tend to blame ourselves.

Maybe we just need to be around more people like ourselves that can keep up with our unusual modes of operation.
Thoughts like this help me to be more hopeful.

Look at us really. We're not just a bunch of sad toxic people that should off ourselves.
We have an enormous amount of intellectual power just on this forum.
For one, many of us are intimately fluent in psychology, anthropology, etc... and offer an extra outside perspective of them as well.
If someone had an extremely perplexing problem that required out-of-box thinking, then I would send them here to get their answers.

I wish I could offer you a unequivocal, indisputable reason to change your mind, Ann.

There's a lot good in your brain. You could do something really good some day.

I didn't know how you'd take my response--but I felt like I had to make a response, anyway.

Me, too.

I profoundly disagree with our culture's universal condemnation of suicide. IMO, a person's right to choose to end their situation, permanently, ought to be sacrosanct.

However, I do believe that making that choice is usually unnecessary. Permanent solution to a temporary problem, and all that.

You seem to me to be a good and intelligent person. It is a shame that you find yourself stuck in a rejecting environment. I feel that the world would be a poorer place absent your insights.

I think I know what you mean. It is the lemmings that don't jump that ensure the survival of the species.

I'm sure I would love to work in a place with you people like androbot (Ann?).
Someone may come up an say ________ is a freak, or very weird, or something like that, and I would answer, "yeah maybe, but they are an incredible resource that absolutely cannot be replaced by an NT or anyone else.

BuyerBeware put it more eloquently than I could.

I think that, a strong determination to face difficulties is needed. It is also possible to train the mind, such as to deal with negative thoughts. If you can train your body, you can also train your mind. For this, you have to know the root of your problems to start to analyse them, and after a number steps, you can begin the training. One of the things I am reading advices how to approach these things.

My depression has nothing to do with feeling unloved, it has more to do with the state of human society.

A thread that goes 1,3, 2, 6, 7, 99.5, cat, 8, 5, x, banana, San Antonio, January, Spielberg... ?

Depression can be caused by many things.

Finding out the true cause, will lead to accurate treatment.

For me it's not driven by any emotions and feelings, but due to my brain being my brain.
The feelings of loneliness and what not magnify it.

Me too. I was in the tech club in high school. It was the only time I fit in with a group.


Yes, and often the people who scoff at my ideas will present the same ideas themselves and be met with praise. It's bizarre.

Thanks kraftie!

Thanks!

Likewise. Wouldn't it be nice if the nts were a minority.


You can only twist your mind so much. I know the root of my problems. I've analysed them. And my depression and isolation are valid responses.

That was not directed at anybody. I could have explained it in a detailed manner, but no one is interested in knowing that....Besides, I never wrote that your depression and isolation are not valid responses....I am not good at this, but I think that, what I wrote- It made you to react in a defensive way, for some reason. Therefore, you took me the wrong way too. By the way, I did not write about "twisting" a mind either. I do not understand why you would get defensive by that comment. I did not even paid attention to what you wrote.

I am reading what you wrote to try and guess better what made you get defensive, just for curiosity. You wrote about your views regarding suicide.....Perhaps you reacted in a defensive way because you expected me to write something that could be denoted as sympathy towards yourself? I do not know you, nor I know nothing about you except for what you wrote in here to even write something of some significance....Even if that were just for sake of sympathy. To resume: no one wrote that what happens to you, whatever it is, it is not valid. No one wrote that.

If you did not like what I wrote, well, you were not even obliged to comment about it, to begin with.

I didn't realise I was being defensive. CBT and positive thinking are valid, but can only take you so far. Twisting your mind to view things in a positive way has been damaging to me. I think just accepting that one's life is not a good one is realistic and healthier then trying convince yourself of the truth of a fantasy.

Sherry, I often respond to things that aren't directed at me. It's nothing personal. And please feel free to disagree and argue with me.

Oh. So, you are not upset nor nothing like that. That is good. I am not good at guessing these things yet. What I am reading about, it is not about CBT. I understand that it is not easy to think in a positive way when you are feeling bad. I was not thinking of becoming extremely optimistic either. I get a rough idea how you could be feeling due to your depression.
I agree that accepting that things are not going well, when they are in fact not going well, it is a good thing to do. Acceptance is one of the steps, another one would be to think how to resolve a problem, before the resolution of said problem. However, it is not an easy process.

some of our depression is from feeling rejected by society and our inability to interact, or from bullying in childhood/adulthood, from difficulties on the job. but perhaps some of our depression might stem from the aspie nature. we're prone to anxiety, and i read on the net people who suffer from general anxiety often suffer from depression. we do tend to see the world differently and have problem regulating our emotions.