Why is it okay to dislike and alienate autistics?

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Yes, this is the neurotypical world view, and by definition the perspective of the majority. If the majority believes in the validity of a simplistic grading of individuals in terms of superior/inferior rank, and if rank is determined by conformity, then the result is the kind of society that we experience every day.

From an autistic perspective you can argue that grading in terms of superior/inferior rank is a degenerate form of systemising that only serves one purpose: conformance.

Perhaps the price for neurotypical social intuition comes in terms of a severely compromised ability to independently construct helpful models of the physical world.

Yes - you could develop a theoretical framework for diagnosing neurotypical neurodeficiency! (Be my guest!)

I think the three core issues of the reigning paradigm of autism are relevant to this thread.

1) the way we are taught to think about autism, the medical disorder model
2) the language we are taught to use about autism
3) the language applied to autistic people ("lacking in........" "challenged by" "unable to" "can't")

In number three alone, there is a PhD for some enterprising graduate; there's another PhD topic probably in the examination of the current paradigm of autism, beginning with how everyone (including autists) are socialised into accepting it as "fact", and what the consequences of this "everyone believes" approach are. To do this well you would have to be able to drop the usual lens of neuronormative and neuroatypical (you can't see a paradigm like that clearly if you are operating inside it). One possibility is working from the different perspective of neuromajority prejudice against neurominority.