does anyone else on the spectrum cut themselfs?

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Rudin
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13 Feb 2016, 7:03 pm

I used to. I threw my "cutting kit" out. I was also recently diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder which puts me at a risk of suicide but I'm on medication. Suicidal ideation is not the worst part of having BPD. The worst part is mania. When I was 5 years old I didn't sleep for 5 days straight.

The most harm I've done to myself is when I took all of my anxiety medication concurrently and I had to go to the hospital and get my stomach pumped.


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slave
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30 Aug 2017, 8:22 pm

Rudin wrote:
I used to. I threw my "cutting kit" out. I was also recently diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder which puts me at a risk of suicide but I'm on medication. Suicidal ideation is not the worst part of having BPD. The worst part is mania. When I was 5 years old I didn't sleep for 5 days straight.

The most harm I've done to myself is when I took all of my anxiety medication concurrently and I had to go to the hospital and get my stomach pumped.


Necro....i know

Fwiw, Rudin, I'm REALLY sry to hear about this. :(

All the best. :D



dragonsanddemons
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30 Aug 2017, 9:52 pm

I self-harm. I started with just scratching myself with the intent of causing pain, to punish myself when I felt I'd done something wrong, and it's progressed from there - eventually I wouldn't be satisfied until I saw blood, and then until I saw enough blood. I think I first started the scratching sometime in high school, and didn't progress to cutting until sometime last year. Nowadays, it makes me feel better when I'm really upset. For some reason (can't really explain it), I really enjoy the sight of my own blood, and enduring physical pain makes me feel strong, tough, when the emotional pain is getting too much. I will usually start because I'm upset, but keep doing it for longer than I might otherwise have because it kind of becomes a stim - like, maybe one flow of blood from a cut would be enough, but I'll keep scratching at it to make it bleed more as a stim.


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slave
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30 Aug 2017, 10:25 pm

The lit. I've encountered on cutting suggest that the vast majority of pt.'s who use NSSI do so to (try to)cope with a history of trauma. A lot more ppl do it than most ppl believe.



renaeden
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31 Aug 2017, 10:52 pm

I cut and burnt myself on my right upper arm/shoulder and my left thigh for about 6 months in 2013. It started superficially with scratches but then escalated into cuts that needed stitches which I didn't get. I believe I did it because I was so flat and depressed that I just wanted to feel something physical.

I ended up in hospital with depression and due to the self harm got dxed with Borderline Personality Disorder. That dx has since been removed because I was given the SCID psychological test for personality disorders and Schizoid Personality Disorder turned up.

Anyway, since I was in hospital (the stay was 3 weeks), I haven't self harmed. Been extremely tempted to and still have my blades but I don't want to go down that path again.



RikMayall
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31 Aug 2017, 11:00 pm

I tried to slash my throat when I was 13.

I cut my chin and it hurt like hell, lots of blood, never tried cutting again, pills are so much easier and far less messy.



soloha
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31 Aug 2017, 11:22 pm

ZombieBrideXD wrote:
I dont know if this a touchy or personal subject for some people, i just wanna know..

Anyone else cut themselfs here? or is it just me?

Image

I guess maybe the question should be; has anyone here on the spectrum been so low they attempted suicide or taken up self harm?

i started cutting myself when my friend did in 2009; i guess i did it to fit in at first but i also cut myself during meltdowns... i dont know why i do, i just do sometimes... i cant really think of a reason why. I do know there was once that i did it because it was a suicide attempt (note the deeper scars on my wrist)

Am i alone on this?

Not alone. When I was younger my meltdowns were outwards. I would smash things. As I got older it turned inwards. There isn't an inch of unscarred skin anywhere on either of my arms from wrist to shoulder. I have some on my stomach as well :(



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01 Sep 2017, 3:06 am

Personally I don't, I have a pretty strong aversion to seeing my own blood. But I'm sure plenty on the spectrum do since there is probably a higher risk of depression due to feeling out of place with Aspergers.


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01 Sep 2017, 7:11 am

I used to. I'm not exactly sure why; never was. Best I can say is that it was an aversive conditioning thing. I thought that, if I hurt myself enough every time I made a mistake, someday I'd be "normal."


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02 Sep 2017, 2:36 am

I don't do it with any sense of regularity but it is something I have found mildly soothing even though it doesn't leave much pretty, nothing that puts me in any danger as I don't wish to expose my bones before it is time.



Joe90
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02 Sep 2017, 7:06 am

I'm squeamish so no matter how angry or depressed I get, I still cannot cut myself.


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02 Sep 2017, 7:24 am

Not cutting but I when I get overwhelmed I usually dig my nails into my body, scratch myself, or hit my arms and head with either my fists or a hanger. I've found recently if I put pressure on both sides of my head (and I mean to the point it hurts a little) that it calms me down at least for a bit.



awkward facepalm
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02 Sep 2017, 7:26 am

no. even though my depression can be really bad, i love myself very much. there are days i cry myself to sleep but i usually catch myself hugging myself.

i don't understand people who are obsessed with violence.



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02 Sep 2017, 8:47 am

No, I don't believe in self-harming.