What do you find weird about neurotypicals?

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I hate it when somebody comes up to me and asks how I'm doing. I'm supposed to lie and say that things are wonderful. I wish I could really tell them how things are.

^^I actually honestly tell people how I'm doing. Some of them do a double take when I don't say 'fine' or 'good', or start to automatically reply 'oh, that's good' in response to 'I'm tired' or 'I'm sick'.

this is literally my n1 pet peeve about autistic (well high functioning ones anyway) communities. why the need to talk down or create labels for other people? being a "neurotypical" means absolutely nothing. Like a person may not be on the spectrum but that does not make him/her 'typical'. I find it fascinating to look at and understand people and i can tell you that even from culture to culture there are significant differences that are enough to make one person seem autistic even if it's just cultural. E.g. I am italian and by italian standards I am a complete weirdo but then in the UK i blend in a bit better, even though I am probably coming across slightly odd if i let my guard down. in italy we are culturally more sociable than in northern countries and people from the UK in comparison to italy seem very unsociable - even the more sociable ones. do cultures create different brain structures? is asperger vs neurotypicals a satisfying conclusion?

The way strangers judge you when you're not quite fitting into their expectations, without considering possible reasons as to why you're not conforming to their expectations, for example, a medical reason.

As has been mentioned, I find it surprising people lie a lot.
I can partially understand lying for your own gain, but lying in order to be polite? What a waste.

An example would be if I'm having an email conversation with a person who says "It's so interesting to speak with you, I really appreciate it", and then doesn't reply to your next email. And then doesn't reply to the follow-up email too. Why would a person lie about such a thing? To protect me? To protect him- or herself?

Granted, my wife has told me that I'm very straight and so has coworkers, but that's the only way I can find to build a healthy relationship to anyone. I don't want to bother with liars. But I'm sure I'm missing some kind of social gain to be had from lying, because evidently it's the norm.

What I find even more mind-boggling is that people are comforted by lies. Just look at politicians. People superficially disdain them for their blatant lies, but how often do you see a dead-on honest person being voted into office? The double-standards baffle me. Again, though, I'm left with that irritating feeling of "just not getting it" ... that's when I feel my diagnosis hurts the most.

Lying
Following the crowd
Wanting things that are, at the very least unhelpful, and at worst, destructive to their physical and mental health

Wasting all that time on people instead of doing something interesting/fun.
The above times a gazillion when they voluntarily waste quite a bit of spare time on people they don't even particularly like, because heaven forbid they said no or turned someone down.

Being so preoccupied with what others - including perfect strangers - think.

Why they insist on saying 'how are you' instead of 'hi' when that is what they really mean.

Small talk.

The need to fill delicious silence with yapping. Hey, we can be in the same room without having to talk!

Wearing clothes that are not just uncomfortable but can even damage your body, like high heels.

Why it's so horrifies them to not pretend to like someone they dislike. I don't mean that they should mouth off to their boss, of course, nor that they should bicker with someone all the time; but if they have a dislike to a peer, why pretend to be buds? Why not just be okay with not talking to each other more than they need to?

^^I actually honestly tell people how I'm doing. Some of them do a double take when I don't say 'fine' or 'good', or start to automatically reply 'oh, that's good' in response to 'I'm tired' or 'I'm sick'.

EzraS wrote:

AJisHere wrote:

You tell 'em, Ezra.

I don't disagree with most of what is being said. I just think people in general suck

That pretty much sums it up.

Their absolute obsession with politeness and rudeness, creating huge structures in order NOT to tell people what they really think and feel, and therefore creating inevitable drama and awkward situations that they for the most part dread, the situations only get more and more complicated as they're part of an interlocking network of people who all obey this extremely complicated way of avoiding everything. These huge structures also absorb them into a world where they are incredibly insecure, terrified of what other's really think about them and any criticism about their personalities. Politeness is like some placebo of a guarantee that they will never have to ever hear negative things about themselves, and that if they do they can always sink self-pityingly into the arms of their friends while telling them that someone was 'rude' to them. Of course without ever having to feel like they have to directly confront their own negative aspects.

Also experimentation's on their individuality are usually minimal compared to that of an autistic person, they are too afraid to do anything 'out there', and 'out there' is considered wearing a few studs on their jacket and being afraid someone will think they look like robert smith, or just bad. Presentation is everything and they get hugely anxious about it, which is why every neurotypical walking down the street is decked out in the latest watered-down fashions. Atleast with autistic people they will either be wearing atleast something a little odd or interesting, or are so honest about the fact that they don't care about fashion that they look entirely unfashionable, which is more of an expression of character than most neurotypicals clothing choices.

I also find it odd how NT's are so ashamed of showing interest in things, it takes a while to weedle out what a neurotypical is really interested in, and even then their ideas can be so underdeveloped. Either they seem undeveloped because they are afraid of what others might think of them being ACTUALLY INTERESTED in something in more than a casual, surface way. OR they are so insecure that they can't even admit to themselves that they are even interested in something, so it goes abandoned and is hardly ever researched and understood outside the occasional youtube video that pops up in Most Popular.

NT insecurity about every single aspect of their lives is astounding, I am so glad that I am unable to even notice what other people think of my choices a lot of the time, or I would not have developed such skills, interests and personal style. I feel like NT's are constantly trying to drag us into a world of monotonous misery that they experience themselves, but are so brainwashed that they're comfortable in it.

1. Automatic deference to authority. A casual familiarity with how the world works should make it obvious that a person's job title or position means little in terms of intelligence or competence. If you want my respect, earn it.

2. Obsession with money. To the point that anyone who has managed to make a lot of it is regarded as a universal wise man, competent to speak on all topics. If Elon Musk said that we should expect a Venusian invasion within the next five years, newspapers would report it seriously and half the people who read it would panic.

3. Extreme concern with appearance, including brand of clothes, car, etc., and generally being acceptable to people they don't even know.

4. Not meaning what they say or saying what they mean, and expecting the same from me. If you want something from me, just tell me clearly. And don't assume my words have some hidden meaning.

5. Casual, easy lying.

given the NT proportion, it is people on the autistic spectrum who are weird, regarding more or less everything