04 Nov 2018, 10:45 am
04 Nov 2018, 12:38 pm
lostonearth35
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Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 50
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Location: Lost on Earth, waddya think?
04 Nov 2018, 1:04 pm
04 Nov 2018, 1:36 pm
04 Nov 2018, 1:37 pm
05 Nov 2018, 1:43 am
HighLlama wrote:
sand and stars in a bottle wrote:
Someone talking for long periods about their own interests and poor eye contact are of course indicators. There are many
It's a shame so much of the language around autism comes from non-autistic people, and their impressions of autistic people (as opposed to how autistic people might describe themselves). I think this can lead to so much confusion. Because, to me, most people don't shut up but are great with eye contact. I don't say that to argue with your or what I quoted above. I just find it funny that neurotypicals see a lot of autistic people as non-stop talkers, when I think most of us here feel the same way about neurotypicals. I sure do. The only difference is we're much more focused in our conversation topics, whereas for them the words matter less than the emotions conveyed and the bonding going on. But, I don't think they would realize that to us they talk ceaselessly, because of course the way they talk is "normal." I guess you could say we may have a narrower interest topic-wise, while they can be as narrow emotion-wise.
Also, with the eye contact, they assume it means lack of confidence because that's why they would behave that way. I get that, but I hate it, because I've had so many people insist that I'm shy or not assertive enough. But, the reality is, I'm not all that shy, I just hate most eye contact and the business and "noise" of conversation (i.e. too many gestures, facial expressions, etc). There are times where I stay quiet because I don't want to deal with all those aspects of interacting, but I think the other person just assumes I'm too afraid to speak my mind. You can't win
It seems like what I have to say about what I think or feel is meaningless, even though I am me! It's ironic to be told you're not assertive enough by people who then tell you what you think and feel. Maybe others can relate.You do realise I'm autistic, not neurotypical though, right?
I agree with what you're saying about how neurotypicals can communicate, but the reality is that autism and talking about a subject whether the listener is interested or not, in a certain way, and knowing a lot about one subject, do go hand in hand and can be an obvious sign of autism
I don't get what offended you about what I said about eye contact. I've picked up on poor eye contact in other people on the spectrum at times. I'm not saying it because neurotypicals say it about us.
Sweetleaf
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05 Nov 2018, 1:51 am
05 Nov 2018, 4:24 am
sand and stars in a bottle wrote:
HighLlama wrote:
sand and stars in a bottle wrote:
Someone talking for long periods about their own interests and poor eye contact are of course indicators. There are many
It's a shame so much of the language around autism comes from non-autistic people, and their impressions of autistic people (as opposed to how autistic people might describe themselves). I think this can lead to so much confusion. Because, to me, most people don't shut up but are great with eye contact. I don't say that to argue with your or what I quoted above. I just find it funny that neurotypicals see a lot of autistic people as non-stop talkers, when I think most of us here feel the same way about neurotypicals. I sure do. The only difference is we're much more focused in our conversation topics, whereas for them the words matter less than the emotions conveyed and the bonding going on. But, I don't think they would realize that to us they talk ceaselessly, because of course the way they talk is "normal." I guess you could say we may have a narrower interest topic-wise, while they can be as narrow emotion-wise.
Also, with the eye contact, they assume it means lack of confidence because that's why they would behave that way. I get that, but I hate it, because I've had so many people insist that I'm shy or not assertive enough. But, the reality is, I'm not all that shy, I just hate most eye contact and the business and "noise" of conversation (i.e. too many gestures, facial expressions, etc). There are times where I stay quiet because I don't want to deal with all those aspects of interacting, but I think the other person just assumes I'm too afraid to speak my mind. You can't win
It seems like what I have to say about what I think or feel is meaningless, even though I am me! It's ironic to be told you're not assertive enough by people who then tell you what you think and feel. Maybe others can relate.You do realise I'm autistic, not neurotypical though, right?
I agree with what you're saying about how neurotypicals can communicate, but the reality is that autism and talking about a subject whether the listener is interested or not, in a certain way, and knowing a lot about one subject, do go hand in hand and can be an obvious sign of autism
I don't get what offended you about what I said about eye contact. I've picked up on poor eye contact in other people on the spectrum at times. I'm not saying it because neurotypicals say it about us.
Yes, I know you're not neurotypical and you didn't offend me. I was ranting about my experience with neurotypical people. One of my points was that, yes, autistic people can go on a lot when the listener isn't interested, but neurotypical people feel the same way to me. They just don't do it on one narrow subject.
lostonearth35
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Joined: 5 Jan 2010
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,689
Location: Lost on Earth, waddya think?
05 Nov 2018, 1:02 pm
05 Nov 2018, 9:24 pm
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