What I Like About Autistic People Is...

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And the way every one of us understands a different meaning to something someone says or posts.

Like the infamous Recidivist posting that meme of someone injecting an arm. We all got a different meaning from that.

When I was young, I really thought that most people were not very smart. I said that out loud to a therapist once and she was so shocked she said, "You don't mean that!" I said, "I can not-say it, but I can't not-think it." I try to be less judgmental now. People have different strengths. Certainly many people are much better than I am at just living life and getting along. I suppose that's a kind of intelligence? (But I still think it...)

Basically I used to like everyone and think they were nice/ meant well.

I've learned over the years that actually most people aren't very nice and they're out for what they can get. So I don't like everyone anymore, I keep myself to myself.

Yes! People who are socially adept, especially women who are very social, I find, can't imagine that it's difficult or impossible for some of us to be like that, so they don't give us any kind of break because they assume we must be awkward and tongue-tied because we don't care enough to make the effort.

But I don't know any autistic people in real life, so I don't know if it would be easier for me to communicate with someone on the spectrum. I pass fairly well, so I feel a bit like an impostor if I say I'm autistic (which is still a bit of a question mark, given that two assessments I had came back inconclusive, but I don't know what else it could be, and I find that I relate to many things I read on WP).

What my mother, who might have been on the spectrum herself, taught me about "sharing" when I was little was: "If you let other kids play with your toys, they will break them." (And she was right.) So I did not quite grow up thinking that everyone was nice or meant well.

I don't want to keep to myself though. I am so lonely. I would love to have a partner. And maybe some friends, though I do have a very few.

I suppose it was because most people I knew when young were nice. We lived in a suburb, all the neighbours were nice and friendly. Yes there was the odd grouchy one or nasty child but most people were nice to me, treated me well and I had a happy life.

Suddenly when my dad died people stopped being so nice and were impatient with me, how dare I be miserable and not fun anymore? I should pull myself together and stop upsetting other people with my grief, how dare I annoy them so much?

But after that I had some nice friends, life was generally good but as I got older every year I realised that people weren't so nice. The more problems I had, the nastier people were to me. And in the last couple of decades, OMG, what horrible people I've met. It's just been the gradual realisation that most people are in fact selfish and don't consider the feelings of others in the way I consider theirs. i.e. I always try not to upset people but they don't act the same with me.

So I've shut the door and don't bother trying to make friends anymore. f**k 'em all.

But I hope you find a nice partner and friends, they are out there somewhere. Hard to find but they are there.

What I like about Autistic people is that they are not nts