What do you think it means if your therapist says he's not

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The more I think about this the more I think I have to drop him. Because of his reaction the dynamic has changed and trust was lost. I can continue to teach him if he wishes but I can no longer be anything more than a patient on an intellectual level. That would be great for him because that is what he is used to. It would just be a waste of money for me though because it would not help me in any way that I can't get elsewhere.

I'll just wait to see what he says and how it all turns out. When this sort of thing happens I always feel like I did something wrong or like I was bad in some sort of way. I know it's not true but it makes it easier to deal with. If people react badly to my child side or if something really bad happens with someone, it's a lot easier for me to to just think that I am at fault. Don't know why. Maybe it makes me feel like I have some kind of control over the situation. I guess I shouldn't ask him about that.

He's inept!

I think there may be some ineptness especially in how he handled this particular situation. But I think that in other ways he has shown himself to be very competent. I don't need perfection, nor do I seek it in people. I am even fine for him to have majorly blundered in this particular situation. Grace must always abound because we are all imperfect people and I can certainly be a major screwup at times. What would have made it ok for me is if he had not given up on me.

If that's your profession. you can't lame out with "I can't help you!" - That's his job!

If he can't handle it, perhaps he's in the wrong profession!

I thought that too for a moment until people posted about specifics in training within the profession. So that made me think that perhaps he is not trained in certain things. I guess that's ok. I don't require it of him but he might require it of himself.

I don't think that you having autism makes it ok he drops you, but right now for both my children I feel I am battling prejudice, so maybe I am seeing it when it does not exist. Your therapist, undoubtedly, is doing his best. However, you did nothing wrong beyond confusing him. He should seek to understand from you, from peers, from reading or training. He made a decision he would treat you a year ago. If he feels he cannot be helpful than you deserve a dialogue about why.

I still think and hope this was just an emotional utterance on his part. Or that he spoke an inner private thought that should have remained inside his head out loud.

He is not entitled to just drop people for acting autistic because that is uncomfortable. Aggression or violence he does not know how to control to maintain safety sure. Unable to speak when upset in one session or sitting on the floor does not seem like a valid safety issue or reason to give up.

I have been wondering and feel I have to ask.....do you feel it possible he is mildly on the spectrum himself? Or has family who are?

I bet you could use your "child's side" for creative/artistic purposes. Have you ever read Carl Jung? I think he would embrace this side of you.

Dude, Carl Jung has been dead for a long time. It would be weird to be embraced by a corpse!

I do. It's really fun actually. I have not read Carl Jung, I might have to look him up.

LOL...he would HAVE embraced you. He passed away in 1961, the year of my birth.

But his adherents would embrace you.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 02 Jan 2016, 1:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I think he means that in theory rather than literally.

Thank you, that would be nice! And perhaps his spirit would too!

I don't actually know his family but I am sure he has plenty of experience with Autistic people. I know he knows many.

I agree that it's not a reason to give up on someone. I can understand the perspective of him feeling like he would like to help but does not think he knows how and that he thinks there are others who might know how better. But like you said, it was the absolute wrong time to say that. And I would think that the patient should have a say in what happens in a situation like that. I am very capable of making those kinds of decisions for myself. If I were incapable of making them that would be a different story. But I am very much in my right mind and I can understand things very well. I even think there are some things about our relationship that he does not understand and that he needs to grow in. But yeah, I think he spoke out of turn. Hopefully this will all clear itself up when we meet again.

My biggest sadness in this is that even if he does not give me up and wishes to continue working with me, I will be glad for it, but I don't know that my child side will show up with him again. At least not for a long time. We will just talk about intellectual concepts and that's ok as long as I can afford it. But if the child side does not come back to him, that is a great loss especially for him. For him to be able to learn about "her" is priceless and would really give him an understanding of this side of Autism that is not well documented. At least I have not found any real documentation about it. And it would have given "her" one more outlet and place to express herself which would have been great.

He does not have the knowledge or skills to help. Find someone who does.

That's what he means

Yeah, I understand that. I don't need to find someone else though. I am not interested in finding someone else. He can work with me or not work with me. That's up to him. Whatever he wants with that is what will happen. He'll just have to tell me what he wants.

It's funny. I joined two other organizations that are designed to help disabled people including people on the Spectrum and got shuffled out of both of them because, at times, I was too Autistic. The problem is that most of those places are designed to help kids not adults even though they say the are. So the adults that they help tend to be lower functioning people with obvious issues. If you are high functioning and don't have the obvious issues and you are not a child, anything you do that seems out of place to them is considered bad and either you have to become more NT to fit the program or you have to get out because you become scary to them. The problem is that the people running those programs only know what they have been taught in school about Autism which is usually a bunch of stereotypical BS so anything that does not fit that or that is an Autistic trait that they are not familiar with is too much for them to handle.