How do you feel when someone denies you have Asperger's?

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How do you feel when someone denies you have Asperger's?
Angry 53%  53%  [ 52 ]
Happy 3%  3%  [ 3 ]
Sad 7%  7%  [ 7 ]
Anxious 9%  9%  [ 9 ]
I don't feel any emotion 11%  11%  [ 11 ]
I feel some other emotion (Explain) 17%  17%  [ 17 ]
Total votes : 99

loske
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20 Mar 2008, 1:05 am

It's why I feel like I don't want to tell people. I'm not ashamed, but I feel like I won't be able to deal with them saying I'm not different. It is their assumption that I must feel shame and want to be told "no you're normal"... You try this "normal"!



paolo
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20 Mar 2008, 2:47 am

Approach to disability. Deformity is not well received even when its nature is understood. If you miss a leg there is always the suspect that the lame person is asking something more than due from people because he/she is lame. In a sense a kind of blackmail (this by the way may happen). If moreover the cause of the disability is not easy to understand, chances are that the existence of disability will be not recognized.
Here there is also the subterranean influence of psychoanalysis: people don’t know much really about Freud &Co, but commonplaces leaking from psychoanalysis are largely rooted in common sense psychology. So many people prefer to accept the idea of problems deriving from traumas and family history rather than from defect of modularity, miswiring of brain etc. These are also concepts which make untenable the ideas of good and evil, which are comfortable for people to entertain.



Tempy
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20 Mar 2008, 3:31 am

I picked other emotion because it is a mix between angry and anxious, i think. Its like, i get cold and humid and cant fight the urge to look down at all

this happen to any1 else?



nobodyzdream
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20 Mar 2008, 4:28 am

I don't know how it makes me feel. Initially, I suppose it makes me angry, but that is often short lived, as I know the stigma that seems to surround autism has a lot of people very unaware of what it actually is.

So at first I get mad, then I realize they have no clue, and wouldn't even with a lot of knowledge most likely simply because they do not have to deal with it. Since they cannot relate to me, they will not be able to relate in any way whatsoever, so they deny that it exists in hopes of finding a reason that they can accept easier.... you know, like saying I'm just stupid and lazy instead, lol.

I've gotten fairly used to it, but I used to become instantly angry.


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MJIthewriter
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20 Mar 2008, 4:33 am

Probably frustration...

That and probably some other emotion depending on the scenario and the person.



KingdomOfRats
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20 Mar 2008, 2:42 pm

LabPet wrote:
Upon reading the above, just a hypothetical scenario: Just suppose any one of us had, say, a visible limp with pain that sometimes became acute. So, if another might ask, or you/we offer that we have, in this scenario, multiple sclerosis (MS), would others be so quick to judge? Would they be so raging harsh? Or just plain stupid? Are NTs so inconsiderate that they feel fully entitled to judge us? Why?

I have known one with MS and this NEVER happened to him. Same with other 'disorders,' which may be necessary to discretely disclose in the school or the workplace, such as diabetes. We are easy targets; autism/AS is a mystery neuro/psych disorder with misconceptions galore. I think the misunderstanding &/or misinterpretation is one of the hardest aspects of being an Autie/Aspie.

LabPet,
people with disabilities that require well known disability aides [eg,wheel chair,cane...] or have a different look as part of their disability [eg, downs,FAS,dwarfism...] do get crap treatment off others and all the usual stereotyping,misunderstanding etc,
am know a few wheel chair users online and Mark [who am live with and is a wheel chair user] they're all automatically treated like little children,patted on the head,spoken around and not to...
A lady am used to have as support staff at college has dwarfism and she was treated like a child all the time because of her height.
And David [who also lives here] has downs,but he is the opposite of the old downs stereotype,he's able to do anything-except he isn't treated that way,he's treated like a helpless child and has everything done for him including his tea [as in the drink] and he allows it,he won't do anything for himself because of the routine they've given him,yet with am,they refuse to help am with something [such as verbal and visual help with getting changed] until the manager spots am in completely stained stuff and has a rant at the staff for ignoring her,autism training,support plan and guidelines again.

Am know it might seem it would make Autism or AS easier for others to understand if it had some sort of physical difference,
but with that comes it's own set of ignorance to,can't win either way really.


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20 Mar 2008, 10:00 pm

KingdomOfRats - You're precisely right. I didn't mean to imply other disabilites are not tremendously difficult to deal with, including the way they are treated by others. They certainly are, or can be, mistreated or ignored. I like paolo stated it best (above). I did mean that Auties/Aspies often have to 'apologize' for their difference and the misconceptions are rampant! For one in a wheelchair, for instance, their 'difference' is readily apparent and explainable; ours may not be.


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JakeWilson
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20 Mar 2008, 10:04 pm

I feel a little upset, anxious, angry, and I hear a quick "voice" in my head saying to hold my tongue (Not an audible voice of course).



Tim_Tex
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20 Mar 2008, 10:12 pm

It doesn't really cross my mind.


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ghostofzoelund
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21 Mar 2008, 12:23 am

cataspie wrote:
Anxious,i got told today by the only person i talk to apart from family that i talk to much to be autistic and can have a conversation.She said i could of been lazy and let others talk for me as a child.She said i do have eye contact problems and something must of happened to me as a little girl that stopped me making eye contact.I said i had never been abused and she said nothing.She said i was to clever to be autistic and that if it was AS i would only be clever by knowing about a certain thing.She says she knows this because she works with autistic people.She works with people who are very low functioning and need day care.
I mention walking on my toes and sniffing things all the time and i get told i should just forget about it.
I feel anxious because i had found something that made my life make sense and my parents had kept what the social worker said about autism secret.My mother thinks i am on the spectrum and should get help i feel like im going mad.
I also think its best from now on to realise that have no friend.


My mother doesn't believe me and makes lists of the reasons why I don't have it. She thinks she knows what she's talking about because she works in a drug rehab, and someone with AS came in, therefore she is an expert. Please. I was thinking about having her go on this site and look at some of the postings so she can get a better idea of what AS really is. Maybe that would work with your friend, too.