Do you love or hate having aspergers/autism?

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I'm blind to some of my aspie traits. I don't always realize I am doing something like taking something literal or I hogging up the conversation and no one gets a word in edgewise, talking loud which happens often, mentioning my obsessions often, not picking up on body language or non verbal cues and saying soically innaproppiate things. Lot of these things just sneek up on me. I am blind to seeing how hard social situation are for me. I feel okay in them but my husband can tell how much I struggle in them, same as showing empathy and affection. I have no idea how I am viewing the world different and people keep thinking I'm black and white. I don't think I am but everyone keeps thinking I am. My husband has been the only one who has never thought it because he doesn't know what it means but he's said I have gotten really upset over little things. I realise later on I did after I am calm and I was out of line. Sometimes I feel like a jerk for it.

I don't pay any attention to my traits.

I can't say I would.

I'm normal for a cat. Cats rock.

Can you cure me of being human?

That's the problem. I can't think of anything that would make me proud. You might think I'm choosing to be apathetic but I assure you I'm not. I desperately want to have more enthusiasm for life but I just don't have much access to that emotion these days.

As I posted earlier in this thread, I am firmly in the "hate it" camp. However, currently the poll is showing 65% love and 35% hate. How do I get into this majority? How does one get started on accepting being an Aspie? I get a lot of positive reinforcement from NTs when I act enough like them, but I just can't keep up the facade anymore. I want to love myself for who I am, not for who I would have been if I didn't have AS.

I felt the same as you, I still have a hate or love relationship with my autism. What I think is that people started looking deep into themselves and the positives and the targets they have to get to know and love themselves.....
Also it can be the way they were brought up?

Having an autistic moment, half the time, I dont even realise that im even doing it, which I don't like about it.

Also its a gift thing, well thats what it seems like to me

Do you have a talent that you focus on?

If so, try and focus on that.. but the friendship, I normally act more like a NT, especiallly in public. If you trust them enough, I would probably tell them about it.

I found that a large of acceptance of myself as an Aspie, came initially from the diagnoses, and then the understanding of many stressful situations in my life. Just knowing that there was a valid reason for them, helped a lot. Acceptance came in stages, but loving myself as an Aspie came with focusing on my strengths, and using them to do things that I feel good about.

I'm Steve, a self-diagnosed Aspie (or half-aspie, it's sorta like I've got half Aspie traits and half NT traits). And if my Asperger's were a person, I'd find the nearest knife and stab it to death. That is the level of hate I have for my Aspergers.

I spent the entirety of my high school career (I'm in my freshie year of college now) wishing I could be one of the "in" crowd, wishing I could go to parties and have a hell of a time, wishing I could have a hot girlfriend, wishing I could just have the traditional high school experience. I achieved almost nothing of what I wanted to be and I'm feeling as if I'm wasting away my youth.

I do like the one advantage it gives me (genius-like smarts) but it doesn't cancel out all of the awkwardness and isolation. I see alot of Aspies on here that embrace their Aspergers and are well off without the company of people and a social life, but I'm just not like that. I have a need for a social life. I have a need to be loved by a girl/woman. I'd trade being smart for being happy and having an awesome social life (even though I'd just be average) in a flash. Then again, some of the people on here are older and have had more time to accept themselves for who they are, so I'll have to see where that goes.

My main focus is on defeating my Aspergers and reversing all of the social awkwardness and isolation that comes with it. I believe it is possible with practice and hard work. I just gotta figure out what exactly what makes me so awkward during conversation and out in public in general, and I should be good.

Neither option fits when it comes to how I feel about having Asperger's. It's not a love/hate thing. It comes with the packaging.

I neither love or hate it. I'm not the kind to say things like "I'm proud to be an Aspie" because really you should be proud about things you've achieved through graft, although I do understand why people say that. I'm neither upset about having it, it's just part of my personality. It's a thing I have, nothing more.

I really hate it. There's no point of having AS in a world that is dominated by 99% NT, you feel completely powerless. If there were more AS'ers than maybe I could enjoy being it a bit more. But right now when I go outside, it's all NT, so no I don't enjoy having it.

I hate it. If I could take a pill tomorrow and be NT, I would ask why it can't be today. It has caused me a lot of grief.

~Kate

I love it.

Sure social difficulties annoy me, but I have my own little corner in my mind that is rather pleasant. My own little talents, my own ideas and opinions.

And to put it bluntly I somewhat enjoy knowing that I am different (most days anyway), I'd never want to be normal.

I don't really love OR hate it; it just is.

But since I've been learning about AS and what it entails, I've certainly been more comfortable with the way I am.

I have some days where I've cried in frustration and exclaimed that the few moments of hypoxia in the womb ruined my entire life. I have other days where I exclaim that those moments were the best thing to ever happen in my life. Either way, they were the most important minutes of my life, and I know that while they come with really difficult challenges, they also come with really great advantages.

I'll just bet the answers {love it/hate it} are relative to the age of the aspie responding. It is not easy at all being an older person. If you had early intervention and have a strong support base around you, then it might not be so bad. I am essentially on my own in this world. I am fortunate to have a husband, who loves me, he had a disabled brother when he was growing up, and I'll bet that has a lot to do with his patience and understanding. But I have no support or even contact with "family"... I am an adoptee, so I was quite a disappointment to the people who thought they were buying a perfect baby. And they were quite clear about that while I grew up. Haven't spoken to them in over 27 years. I only have husband and dogs. Not easy, finding out FINALLY what is 'wrong' with me, that was such a disappointment to them... and me....

As someone just learning about things, I currently HOPE that this is me... it answers questions and makes me feel like if I apply this filter of what is different that most of the rest of me is completely typical... In fact the reason I question how deep I am is because of how normal I feel when I strip away the similarities that I have to AS/HFA diagnosis...

So for me... I actually want it to be more true in my mind... it'll make me feel better, it'll make me feel like I know whats up and what things are natural for me and what things I can improve upon...

It's like having a super-power with weaknesses, and finally learning that you have it... and that its the reason that you were able to shoot fireballs from your fingers or whatever super heroes do (I am not big on super hero stories sorry)