Abused by those with BPD

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This would be from depression, I take it? No need to stigmatise perfectly undisordered autistics or borderlines just because you're depressed.

I am kind of a loser, and I don't feel I am a horrible person.

I also consider the time I banged my head from sensory overload to be disordered behavior (as well as the many times I've fought the urge to the point of shutdown). I also consider that sensory overload and shutdown eating 2-4 hours out of most of my days to be frustrating and and not "perfectly undisordered." I also consider the fact that I can't function in school or at work for a very long time before crashing from overload and social exhaustion and having to recover for periods longer than I spent at school or work to not be "perfectly undisordered," and that was not because of depression, but rather the cause of it. I don't think my inability to completely handle all of my needs or live independently is "perfectly undisordered." And the only reason I don't really have an opinion on my inability to maintain relationships is because I am not interested in having a serious relationship.

I'm not stigmatising anyone when I admit that there are less than perfect elements of being autistic. It doesn't make anyone less of a person or less of a human being. I don't see the point of lying to myself and saying that I am perfectly undisordered just because being autistic doesn't make me inferior. It doesn't, but it still presents challenges to daily living, and I find that saying "it's not a disorder" tends to deny those challenges in favor of presenting a fake front.



This kind of thing is why I have no idea what "smart" means. Is it really a superpower that grants you absolute control over your cognition and emotions? I don't think so.

Tell yourself whatever convenient story helps you, I guess.

"This kind of thing is why I have no idea what "smart" means. Is it really a superpower that grants you absolute control over your cognition and emotions? I don't think so."

In this context it would be people who can deal with other people. Smart borderlines are the funnest and most affecting people you'll meet. Along with smart autistics and smart psychopaths. So long as they can deal with other people they don't need to hurt them. So, y'know, be sure you know who you are and aren't talking about when throwing labels around.

I have a theory that a lot of people have a really deep-seated loathing at the idea of themselves being victims, which is why they are unsympathetic and quick to trot out the "victim mentality" trope in attack of perceived "whiners". People with a strong "deal with it", "suck it up", etc... attitude towards everyone and everything are often people who've been abused themselves.

Certainly. Although note that everyone has a pathological reason for everything, or there wouldn't be forums or politics or people trying to change anyone's mind. Ultimately it's all about power.

If they're always super nice and friendly and have perfect relationships then chances are they aren't even diagnosable, which means it's questionable that they even have anything in the first place.

A hypothetical oracle [link] could diagnose them. In practice this is me for all undiagnosables less 'smart' than me, and in practice they aren't always super nice, they have distinctive blind spots.

Let's say that for any person, there's a bpd who would only ever appear angelic. I'd like that to be kept in mind.

Going on about how smart you are does not fix the fact you where defending abusive behavior and claiming its the victims fault if they are abused....and usually those who feel the need to repeatedly claim how much smarter they are then everyone are not so smart themselves.

That's why I used quote marks.

nice absence of logic.

any clue what you try to tell?

I don't really see what that changes....besides the idea that abuse is the victims fault, is not very smart.

I never said abuse was the victim's fault.

A perfect assessment.

I will say one thing. Growing surrounded by BPD taught me social skills I never would have learned otherwise. I had to become incredibly sensitive to constantly shifting social and emotional expectations. I had no choice.

People asked me how I developed the ability to blend in socially with no diagnosis and no training. I HAD to. I would have been beaten within an inch of my life if I didn't.

I've been through some pretty twisted things that I'd rather not discuss here. BPD destroys lives... and if you're not careful, you and everyone around you will believe you are entirely to blame.

That seemed to be what you where implying.

Everybody just keep in mind that when fraac says "smart" he means capable of "dealing with people" which means able to play the game. BPDs are incredibly nice people until you cross them or they aren't able to get what they want from you. So in fraac's language a smart BPD would be one who never fails to get what they want, so they would come off as nice people. Fraac, correct me if I misunderstood you.

I'm not sure if there is any place for genuineness in fraac's worldview. Again, fraac, correct me if I' m wrong.