What do NTs hate so much about us?

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I am quite lucky in that I have several close NT friends who really look after me and help me in social situations and situations in the workplace. I am sorry that people have been so nasty to you, AspieMD. I was bullied at school and some people still take advantage of the fact that I take everything literally and at face value. Sometimes NT people can be surprisingly understanding about the difficulties we face. Recently I had to confide in my boss about another member of staff who I was having issues with (this particular staff member doesn't really understand Aspergers at all which makes life difficult for me) and my boss deliberately avoided making eye contact with me at all as he knows that I can't make eye contact at all when I am stressed and anxious. I think it helps that I work in a special school and so a lot of my colleagues are used to working with people on the autistic spectrum. I think it really depends on who you find-my AS behaviour is slightly more obvious than some members on here have described theirs as being-I jump up and down and clap my hands really quickly when I am excited and bite my knuckles and scratch at my skin when I am agitated but I am still generally well accepted by people. I do appreciate how lucky I am to have this.

I will read more later but basically, to the OP, some people are just very shallow and some people are very insular in that they dislike anyone who isn't exactly like themselves (that's also a bit narcissistic but a lot of people are that way too.) And then NT due to peer pressure and liking to hang out in groups of similar types, often worry that a given person wouldn't fit in (again because they're not exactly like themselves.)

In other words it's a lot of superficial reasons, but a lot of people seem to have a really strong drive to sort everyone into groups, whether it's by skin tone, fashion sense, religious beliefs, cultural background, gender, a million ways.

I'd say keep moving (past the ones who ignore you) until you find someone who can see people as individuals, because that person will likely be a lot more interesting anyway.

Yeah I see where you are coming from aspieMD. One thing that I have noticed is that NTs unconsciously place a value on a person based upon their degree of social intelligence. They interact with you and subconsciously assign a low value to you, based on your low social intelligence. I think it is an instinctual mechanism. That's the guess best I have for you unfortunately.

By the way are there many aspies in medicine? I am currently studying electrical engineering and since the prevalence of AS is so high, my situation is not as bad as you have described. I empathize with your situation, as I have experienced the same mysterious behavior.

I stopped caring about what they think about me. There was a time I felt like I was trying to "fix" myself to not have to put up with their bad behavior and that didn't work. Now I realize after watching so many social engagements is that they change the rules at any given time and make up new rules to eliminate those who they don't like. Then when they feel it's a convenience, put on a big fake smile and pretend they are nice caring charitable people.

Just take a deep breath and realize something.

THEY ARE RIGID AS HELL TOO when things don't go their way and complete hypocrites by constantly chastising autistics for the same behavior they too engage in with certain situations. People that act this way have the brain of a bully and they will pick on autistics thanks to the media's subliminal encouragement. They target those who do not have support.

I completely sympathize with anyone who can read social cues (certain ones if not all of them) but struggles to know how to respond. I hear you. Same thing here.

We are trying to reason out our reactions, when for most people there's no reasoning involved; it's just something that happens. Even though I understand this now, it still doesn't address my inability to spontaneously act and react in the "correct" ways.

Being someone with skills others need (even if they don't want to hang out with you "just because") isn't that bad. Find what you are good at and try to become a world expert in it. Eventually you will be respected, and that respect will be more authentic than the fake and fleeting respect behind popularity contests.

Life IS tough, but that's okay, so long as we believe in our own dignity and gifts.

Hi,

I can't say that I have ever noticed that people on the AS are hated by NT's.
My observations however do indicate that many NT's fear us. They are afraid of what they don't understand.
Perhaps; just as we struggle with the NT world, so NT's struggle with the AS world. The difference being that they make up the majority, and we are in a very small minority. The majority consensus is what determines the "norm".
Many people on the AS struggle with understanding body language, and what the various facial expressions mean. That means that they find it very difficult to communicate with others. However, many of those AS people do not show body language or appropriate facial expressions themselves. Therefore NT's cannot "read" them. This would make NT's feel very uncomfortable.
Also, my own experience is that NT's expect every adult to have a partner (girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, or husband). They cannot seem to understand that many AS persons do not want a partner, and are quite happy with being permanently single. I myself have always been single because the social processes of having a partner are baffling to me. In fact it is very difficult to explain as to exactly why because it's just something I cannot grasp/understand.
NT's find it weird that it doesn't even bother me.

So, in my opinion I don't think that NT's hate us, but that they are afraid of what they cannot understand, and what doesn't fit into the "norm".

This thread has had a lot of replies and that is down to the fact there are many different types of users on here. I guess its plain to see what the difference is from someone who is detailed orientated or just focused to some degree. For NTS, they are prone to moods and depression even more than us, because they think and feel everything too literally without basing some knowledge on the facts of the equation. Too often I have been accused of a)worrying too much and b) focusing too much time and energy on the wrong things. well, let me tell you at a glance, science is wrong too. Often people get their hopes up of thinking they have spotted a way out of an abstract equation or answer, when really, its all staring them blank in the face with possible answers and explanations. They just don't want to be called or bothered with them and that's why they team up with thinking that all typical people are expertly involved in their own making of the world and we are not, Fools. If only they'd see, but no they do not.

I can relate to some NT's just fine. Those that I can relate to aren't bothered by my AS except when I have meltdowns. I will eliminate the meltdowns, so, therefore, no one will have a problem with my high-functioning autism, anymore.