Do you feel you fit in WP???

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Sweetleaf
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12 Nov 2014, 4:15 pm

CockneyRebel wrote:

I don't feel that I fit in on WP. I feel that I'm very different from most people here and I also don't feel that some of the members accept me as I am. There have been times that I was starting to feel comfortable and open up that a bunch of members would attack one of my main special interests in the section that I post in the most. Seeing those threads bump repeatedly to the top of the page have made me wonder when the nightmare was going to end. I guess I'm a misfit, no matter where I am. It makes me wonder if Ray Davies wrote the song, 'Misfits' for all the Kinks Fans who feel that they are overpopulated by people who enjoy music that's more popular. I'm the only Olympic nut here as well. I also feel that it's better for me to be myself than it is to force myself to enjoy and live in the present, but there were members who have tried to convince me otherwise.

The thing that keeps drawing me back are the members who do understand me and my desire to support and help others when I can. I also feel a sense of community at times.

I have heard some music of The Kinks, is misfits the one that says 'I'm not like everybody else' or something like that, if so I really like that song. But yeah a lot of today's popular music really does suck for lack of a better term, and the sad part is some people think that represents all of todays music where there are a lot of good bands they just aren't making the 'Top 40' or whatever.

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Eloa
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12 Nov 2014, 4:22 pm

I am not sure,
I can relate to experiences,
but I don't know if people relate to my experiences,
as people hardly react to what I write,
and when I open a topic, I hardly get answers.
In the beginning it was the case I guess as I failed at answering on answers I got,
but then I tried to be more reciprocal in my threads,
but still it seems that hardly anyone can relate to my experiences,
and other topics I have a hard time to relate to, like driving, work, friends and stuff as I don't do and have,
but whatever,
and sometimes I am too dumb for joining a conservation,
then conversations proceed so quickly and highly intellectuaI that I have a very hard time to follow.

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alex
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12 Nov 2014, 4:34 pm

I do

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B19
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12 Nov 2014, 5:09 pm

:lol: Would be great to see you here more often though I realise you must be busy.

Piers
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12 Nov 2014, 5:23 pm

I partly feel I fit in here, but the forum is too fragmented.

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Transyl
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12 Nov 2014, 6:00 pm

I feel the most sense of belonging when I see people being open about their eccentricities and special interests. That's how I've always been though. Way before I understood what autism is. Makes me not only feel better about myself but feel like that person is sharing part of themselves with me. Whether or not it's to me directly doesn't matter.

A while back I was at junior college in-between classes standing outside. This girl I didn't know starts talking to me about the Cheetah Girls. Everything from the music to their fashion. She's clearly a major fan. I barely say anything and she doesn't care she just keeps talking to me about them lol. Maybe some people would be annoyed but I loved it. Stuff like that it's almost like being children again.

Sometimes I want to bug people about the things they like. Not necessarily that I like those things too... I just enjoy hearing people talking about what they love. It's refreshing to me to hear that something matters to someone. But because I wouldn't know what to say back they might frustrated that I started the conversation about it.

btbnnyr
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12 Nov 2014, 6:05 pm

I would feel weird if I fit into a group that other people were not in on WP.
I don't think that there are these kinds of groups in the general discussion, maybe only the random.
I definitely don't fit into the parents forum (I go there sometimes to post different viewpoints mostly on education of autistic kids), but I don't have a problem with that.
I don't fit into women's forum either, but that is not so active, and I post only rarely.
In general, I think I relate more to autistic men than autistic women on WP, but in real life, I relate to autistic women too.

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kraftiekortie
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12 Nov 2014, 6:38 pm

I think, around six months ago, that Btbnnyr made some influential posts in the "other than Asperger's thread" within the Parents section. She definitely made a good name for herself there.

Last edited by kraftiekortie on 12 Nov 2014, 6:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Eloa
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12 Nov 2014, 6:40 pm

btbnnyr wrote:

Actually I found WP by doing Google search "autism women" , because I got diagnosed and was searching for experiences of autistic women.
So I found the women's forum, but I don't fit into it either,
actually I did not brouwse it for a long time, guess 2 years plus.
Mostly I only brouwse "General Autism Discussion".
I don't know autistic women in real life,
I do go to autism center for receiving support,
but it's one to one to the psychologist, do not meet people there.

glider18
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12 Nov 2014, 7:07 pm

As I haven't been too regular to post anymore, I don't feel like I fit in like I used to. At first (when I joined in 2008) I felt like I really did fit in. At first I explored so many things about Asperger's as I was on a quest to learn all I could about the "difference" I had been diagnosed with. So naturally for me, I conversed with so many of the members here (many of which no longer visit here).

As I was trying to learn about the members here back in 2008, I would find something interesting and post a comment. One of those members has always maintained utmost kindest and acceptance of me. I made a comment to the member about a cast metal bus this member was holding in a picture. And the member posted back. The member made me feel like I was accepted here. I posted many times about my view of Asperger's as a gift and as a positive in my life. And this member would make comments on my threads about how my way of thinking was appreciated. I truly appreciate and respect that member. That member is CockneyRebel. You have been a positive light for me through the years that I have been a member here. Thank you.

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kraftiekortie
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12 Nov 2014, 8:43 pm

CockneyRebel as Atlas.....that's great!

Dox47
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12 Nov 2014, 9:01 pm

I don't think I particularly 'fit in' here, but I am fond of the place, so I stick around.

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unit_00
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12 Nov 2014, 9:37 pm

well i fit in here more than in the real world, but that's not saying much. :lol:

i think, if i get diagnosed, i will only probably stay for a few more months. most of the attraction of this site is i have problems that others can for oncce relate with, and feel validated. these people won't tell me to 'get over it' and think that i'm exaggerating. if i get diagnosed and they say 'YES your problems are real and here's why' i would be more at peace and be able to work on it on my own.

but overall i don't feel i fit in, and it doesn't bother me as much as i thought it would. i see people who say they feel left out and i do too sometimes, i think that's just the nature of forums. too much information, can't respond to it all. even if you read the post, maybe you don't know what to say. overall i would say more nice people than not.

but, a lot of the time, the ONLY thing we all have in common is AS. which is a big thing but it's not the only thing.

kraftiekortie
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12 Nov 2014, 9:49 pm

I'm ignored all the time.

It doesn't mean that people are purposely ignoring you.

I guarantee: if you post something about some new autism study or something, you'll get many responses.

unit_00
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12 Nov 2014, 9:56 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

I'm ignored all the time.

It doesn't mean that people are purposely ignoring you.

I guarantee: if you post something about some new autism study or something, you'll get many responses.

oh yes, i agree. i have made topics and have had really good responses, people can be really helpful here. and then other times it feels like you are being ignored. more about self-confidence then anything else. (sorry, i keep re-reading this sentence but i can't figure out how to make it more uh, easy to understand)

i agree, i dont think people are purposely ignoring me or anyone else.

SignOfLazarus
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12 Nov 2014, 10:07 pm

unit_00 wrote:

i see people who say they feel left out and i do too sometimes, i think that's just the nature of forums. too much information, can't respond to it all. even if you read the post, maybe you don't know what to say. overall i would say more nice people than not.

but, a lot of the time, the ONLY thing we all have in common is AS. which is a big thing but it's not the only thing.

if this was a group of, say... thirty people? Yeah I'd be hesitant to hang out for very long if the only common thread was that we were all on the spectrum. However, there are a lot of active members here and a lot of places to check out. The entire forum doesn't have to get along or have everything in common [and clearly this is not the case]. But if you are looking for a place like that... you are going to have to look for a long time.

Also, people not responding to posts likely isn't personal.
Hey, I'm awesome and people ignore my posts all the time!

...

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