Is autism becoming infantalised?
I guess there is a lot to unpack here. there are issue of free speech and individual responsibility as well as whether society should accommodate its members.
I think what ultimately this topic comes down to is whether people have a right to dignity and whether others should to whatever extent accommodate and recognize those differences. And if you are in a majority, do you have the right to simply not try. So far, most societies agree that minorities should have that consideration.
Absolutely. Statistics show that autistic people are unemployed or underemployed at far higher rates than the general population, even though the desire for employment is high. So what if a non-verbal autistic candidate cannot get a job simply because there is an interview. How does that candidate fair against a NT candidate even if accommodations are given? Jobs are still a competitive market and normative social skills and presentation are really important, even for jobs that don't require social interaction.
Not everyone can drive as sensory, coordinating, and processing abilities prevent them. They can also be a safety hazard for others on the road.
I am sorry, but you have not shown that autism is not a challenge to employment or other skills. The research would show the opposite.
I mean a lot of the things the original post complains about, for example, are things that make life no different for most people, but much easier for a few. The very fact that there’s pushback against people choosing to be nice is proof that no, autistic people aren’t being coddled.
There are ramps or lifts to access almost every public building. Are people in wheelchairs being “coddled”?
There is an option to turn on subtitles on the TV. Are deaf people being “coddled”?
It’s a silly line of argument. Different people need different things to help them achieve what they’re capable of. If you don’t need support, good for you. But if we can make tiny changes that you barely notice but a few people find extremely helpful, I don’t care if you’re a little annoyed - accessibility is more important.
The disabilities you mention are very specific. If you're in a wheelchair you face the same challenges as everyone else in a wheelchair, if you're deaf you face the same challenges as all other deaf people, this isn't the same with autism. Some people with mild autism hate loud noises while others dislike silence. Some hate bright lights while others are fine with them. Unless you're going way overboard by making safe rooms then you can't accommodate for it. The issues with going to that extreme is that it makes us look very different and reinforces the stigma we often struggle against.
I disagree too. Learning to drive and getting some form of employment makes a big difference in someone's life. It's not just learning to drive, it's the independance and flexibility it provides with what you can do, when you can do it and being much better able to find a job that's enjoyable.
Having some form of employment gives a sense of routine and interaction with others. It's not just the money. It can make an AS feel more content with their lives and gives them a greater sense of purpose.
Wheelchair users and the deaf are also on spectra. Some wheelchair users can walk short distances, some can walk but have issues with pain or fatigue so often prefer a chair, some may be ungainly, or use prosthetics that they might not be comfortable with. They might be able to power their own wheelchair, or they might not. That’s without getting into other disabilities that they might have on top that aren’t directly relevant.
Similarly deaf people - how much hearing do they have? Can they speak like other people, or at all? Do they sign, lip read, read Latin script? That’s why we have subtitles and sign interpreters.
Yes, employment and learning skills can be beneficial, or very beneficial, but they’re not always open to everyone. I don’t think I’d have my current job if not for a few hand-ups. I’d probably be dying on my feet trying to do something I’m not suited to. Lots of autistic people try really hard to find employment but just can’t find it. One of my friends has done loads of voluntary work, work experience, placements, etc., but he’s 25 and in his whole life has only been paid for a few shifts at a garden centre and walking the neighbour’s dog. He’s certainly not being coddled - if anything he lacks an understanding of the support available to him.
I mean a lot of the things the original post complains about, for example, are things that make life no different for most people, but much easier for a few. The very fact that there’s pushback against people choosing to be nice is proof that no, autistic people aren’t being coddled.
There are ramps or lifts to access almost every public building. Are people in wheelchairs being “coddled”?
There is an option to turn on subtitles on the TV. Are deaf people being “coddled”?
It’s a silly line of argument. Different people need different things to help them achieve what they’re capable of. If you don’t need support, good for you. But if we can make tiny changes that you barely notice but a few people find extremely helpful, I don’t care if you’re a little annoyed - accessibility is more important.
Exactly.
And the idea that all Deaf people have the same issues is actually an uneducated one.
My mum is Deaf. She has no hearing in one ear. Her friend on a forum for her specific disease asked her if the hospital were doing zoom calls now - using sign language. Cos her friend would need one.
She had no idea because she has phone calls, she just uses her hearing ear.
The Deaf person in question had equally bad hearing in both ears.
All jobs require job interviews.
It's nobody's business other than my own and my parents whether I work or not.
People really need to learn to mind their own business.
FTR I'm dyspraxic.
Would people care this much if it was my husband supporting me while I did things at home rather than my parents?... I don't think so as that's normalised.
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I mean a lot of the things the original post complains about, for example, are things that make life no different for most people, but much easier for a few. The very fact that there’s pushback against people choosing to be nice is proof that no, autistic people aren’t being coddled.
There are ramps or lifts to access almost every public building. Are people in wheelchairs being “coddled”?
There is an option to turn on subtitles on the TV. Are deaf people being “coddled”?
It’s a silly line of argument. Different people need different things to help them achieve what they’re capable of. If you don’t need support, good for you. But if we can make tiny changes that you barely notice but a few people find extremely helpful, I don’t care if you’re a little annoyed - accessibility is more important.
The disabilities you mention are very specific. If you're in a wheelchair you face the same challenges as everyone else in a wheelchair, if you're deaf you face the same challenges as all other deaf people, this isn't the same with autism. Some people with mild autism hate loud noises while others dislike silence. Some hate bright lights while others are fine with them. Unless you're going way overboard by making safe rooms then you can't accommodate for it. The issues with going to that extreme is that it makes us look very different and reinforces the stigma we often struggle against.
I disagree too. Learning to drive and getting some form of employment makes a big difference in someone's life. It's not just learning to drive, it's the independance and flexibility it provides with what you can do, when you can do it and being much better able to find a job that's enjoyable.
Having some form of employment gives a sense of routine and interaction with others. It's not just the money. It can make an AS feel more content with their lives and gives them a greater sense of purpose.
Wheelchair users and the deaf are also on spectra. Some wheelchair users can walk short distances, some can walk but have issues with pain or fatigue so often prefer a chair, some may be ungainly, or use prosthetics that they might not be comfortable with. They might be able to power their own wheelchair, or they might not. That’s without getting into other disabilities that they might have on top that aren’t directly relevant.
Similarly deaf people - how much hearing do they have? Can they speak like other people, or at all? Do they sign, lip read, read Latin script? That’s why we have subtitles and sign interpreters.
Yes, employment and learning skills can be beneficial, or very beneficial, but they’re not always open to everyone. I don’t think I’d have my current job if not for a few hand-ups. I’d probably be dying on my feet trying to do something I’m not suited to. Lots of autistic people try really hard to find employment but just can’t find it. One of my friends has done loads of voluntary work, work experience, placements, etc., but he’s 25 and in his whole life has only been paid for a few shifts at a garden centre and walking the neighbour’s dog. He’s certainly not being coddled - if anything he lacks an understanding of the support available to him.
I was in a very similar situation to your friend before my mental health was at breaking point.
I was applying for every single job. Doing voluntary work. Had an MA in a subject which tbh I found boring but was vocational. Was trying to seem as NT as possible in interview.
I had one job as an adult (babysitting as a kid), as a typist in a council office then my bosses just disappeared one day and pulled the cash out of the council which was meant to be spent on the village. It was a big scandal in the village. They didn't tell me they were going to do it, they scarpered and didn't leave references.
If I was to take a job now, it would either be self employed work in a dyspraxia/autism friendly job or it would be for someone who already knew me. Which I know some would see as a 'hand out'.
The older you get, the more lack of experience counts against you, too.
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The whole point of the original post and thread has nothing to do with people who are genuinely unable to do certain tasks being expected to all of a sudden do them.
The whole point of the thread is people who CAN do the tasks being assumed incapable of doing them through excessive pandering to their autism which ultimately makes the sufferer doubt their own abilities and gives autistic people as a whole a negative stigma which further hinders them. Like I said in my very first post, not all autistic people are the same. I still believe a massive proportion are far more capable than they give themselves credit for though.
Being genuinely deaf and in a wheelchair is literally the polar opposite to the point I'm trying to make and isn't applicable.
I mean a lot of the things the original post complains about, for example, are things that make life no different for most people, but much easier for a few. The very fact that there’s pushback against people choosing to be nice is proof that no, autistic people aren’t being coddled.
There are ramps or lifts to access almost every public building. Are people in wheelchairs being “coddled”?
There is an option to turn on subtitles on the TV. Are deaf people being “coddled”?
It’s a silly line of argument. Different people need different things to help them achieve what they’re capable of. If you don’t need support, good for you. But if we can make tiny changes that you barely notice but a few people find extremely helpful, I don’t care if you’re a little annoyed - accessibility is more important.
The disabilities you mention are very specific. If you're in a wheelchair you face the same challenges as everyone else in a wheelchair, if you're deaf you face the same challenges as all other deaf people, this isn't the same with autism. Some people with mild autism hate loud noises while others dislike silence. Some hate bright lights while others are fine with them. Unless you're going way overboard by making safe rooms then you can't accommodate for it. The issues with going to that extreme is that it makes us look very different and reinforces the stigma we often struggle against.
I disagree too. Learning to drive and getting some form of employment makes a big difference in someone's life. It's not just learning to drive, it's the independance and flexibility it provides with what you can do, when you can do it and being much better able to find a job that's enjoyable.
Having some form of employment gives a sense of routine and interaction with others. It's not just the money. It can make an AS feel more content with their lives and gives them a greater sense of purpose.
Wheelchair users and the deaf are also on spectra. Some wheelchair users can walk short distances, some can walk but have issues with pain or fatigue so often prefer a chair, some may be ungainly, or use prosthetics that they might not be comfortable with. They might be able to power their own wheelchair, or they might not. That’s without getting into other disabilities that they might have on top that aren’t directly relevant.
Similarly deaf people - how much hearing do they have? Can they speak like other people, or at all? Do they sign, lip read, read Latin script? That’s why we have subtitles and sign interpreters.
Yes, employment and learning skills can be beneficial, or very beneficial, but they’re not always open to everyone. I don’t think I’d have my current job if not for a few hand-ups. I’d probably be dying on my feet trying to do something I’m not suited to. Lots of autistic people try really hard to find employment but just can’t find it. One of my friends has done loads of voluntary work, work experience, placements, etc., but he’s 25 and in his whole life has only been paid for a few shifts at a garden centre and walking the neighbour’s dog. He’s certainly not being coddled - if anything he lacks an understanding of the support available to him.
Perhaps if autistic people were seen as people who are potentially just as capable as anyone else instead of people who need special treatment like is so often the public's perception of them then employers might not be so nervous of hiring him and others like him? Throwing support at AS sufferers isn't always a good thing. It just entrenches the "them" and "us" mentality in everyone.
I mean ableism is baked into society. Even you just said "sufferers" which implies that we all suffer. I think society has a long way before disabled people are not treated as less than. It's a lot of times seen as showing empathy to pity a disabled person who actually doesn't even want your pity.
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Abelism isn't a bad thing provided it's balanced properly. I think unless it's incredibly obvious someone has a disability, people should assume one is just as capable as everyone else. Going to the other extreme isn't at all helpful in my eyes. Not only does it irritate people who are not particularly effected badly by their disability to warrant the level of excess attention and help that's thrust upon them but it's not that helpful to people who genuinely will never be able to overcome the issues everyone is trying to assist them with. That along with with stigma it adds too.....
Abelism isn't a bad thing provided it's balanced properly. I think unless it's incredibly obvious someone has a disability, people should assume one is just as capable as everyone else. Going to the other extreme isn't at all helpful in my eyes. Not only does it irritate people who are not particularly effected badly by their disability to warrant the level of excess attention and help that's thrust upon them but it's not that helpful to people who genuinely will never be able to overcome the issues everyone is trying to assist them with. That along with with stigma it adds too.....
I get what you're saying. I think as far as ableism is concerned, if someone says it's ableist to assume that someone in a wheelchair would be a good bodyguard, that would really be too far. But I don't think most reasonable people would think that's still ableist. What is ableist are things like saying you need to be able to lift 25 pounds if the job doesn't require it.
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With mechanization, employers don't need all available workers. They only want those who are little more trouble than a machine. However, doing useful work is usually part of feeling like a mature adult, and the attitudes around and programs for general welfare are still problematic. It would be nice if we had a guaranteed annual wage, and no stigma about working for less than the usual minimum wage or just doing art or general helping people.
There are always some parents who don't grow into the job and are content with their children as permanent dependents, but it leaves them vulnerable to changes. I am quite dismayed at the focus of aspie education, trying to make us blend in, rather than develop our special abilities. There should be courses for NTs in how to find and collaborate with an asocial technical genius. It is far better to be dependent on a productive partnership than on charity.
I got kicked out of home at 17 because what I was studying was not usually on my exams. Academically, I went right from high-school dropout to guest lecturing to graduating engineers, via the library. I was never able to find a good business partner, though. Without Rolls, we would never have heard of Royce. Seymour Cray was peerless at computer architecture, but he needed John Rollwagen to handle the money for his work. I am sure that far more great work has just been lost. There was a probable Aspie in the Royal Society in the 1700s who had trouble with conversation, but when people re-read his notes in the 1800s, they recognized that he had anticipated about half of the coming "discoveries," but not been understood at the time. If someone had taken the time to get to know him, they might have co-authored some major history.
The whole point of the thread is people who CAN do the tasks being assumed incapable of doing them through excessive pandering to their autism which ultimately makes the sufferer doubt their own abilities and gives autistic people as a whole a negative stigma which further hinders them. Like I said in my very first post, not all autistic people are the same. I still believe a massive proportion are far more capable than they give themselves credit for though.
Being genuinely deaf and in a wheelchair is literally the polar opposite to the point I'm trying to make and isn't applicable.
What are you basing that opinion on? I hope it's not on how people come over on this forum. The truth is you have no idea how people do off this forum/the internet as a whole.
The whole point of the thread is people who CAN do the tasks being assumed incapable of doing them through excessive pandering to their autism which ultimately makes the sufferer doubt their own abilities and gives autistic people as a whole a negative stigma which further hinders them. Like I said in my very first post, not all autistic people are the same. I still believe a massive proportion are far more capable than they give themselves credit for though.
Being genuinely deaf and in a wheelchair is literally the polar opposite to the point I'm trying to make and isn't applicable.
What are you basing that opinion on? I hope it's not on how people come over on this forum. The truth is you have no idea how people do off this forum/the internet as a whole.
Multiple autistic people I've met in person over the years and their families. I've mentioned one of them in the thread. There is nothing wrong in my eyes in making assumptions on what someone with autism can do. I personally think people don't do it often enough. You for example judging from your posts on this thread might benefit from having a small moped. You don't have to go far on it, to the local shop or town centre is something, nothing long distance.
Last edited by Nades on 30 Aug 2020, 5:25 am, edited 1 time in total.
There are always some parents who don't grow into the job and are content with their children as permanent dependents, but it leaves them vulnerable to changes. I am quite dismayed at the focus of aspie education, trying to make us blend in, rather than develop our special abilities. There should be courses for NTs in how to find and collaborate with an asocial technical genius. It is far better to be dependent on a productive partnership than on charity.
I got kicked out of home at 17 because what I was studying was not usually on my exams. Academically, I went right from high-school dropout to guest lecturing to graduating engineers, via the library. I was never able to find a good business partner, though. Without Rolls, we would never have heard of Royce. Seymour Cray was peerless at computer architecture, but he needed John Rollwagen to handle the money for his work. I am sure that far more great work has just been lost. There was a probable Aspie in the Royal Society in the 1700s who had trouble with conversation, but when people re-read his notes in the 1800s, they recognized that he had anticipated about half of the coming "discoveries," but not been understood at the time. If someone had taken the time to get to know him, they might have co-authored some major history.
I didn't even think of that. Aspie generally love dealing with things more than people, in suspect a lot of the engineers in work are also aspies. I done a computer forensics course in uni and again I suspected about 1/4 were also aspies.
I think they work best alone in my eyes and many employers don't recognise that. How to convey their work to others afterwards though is a completely different story.
Having read through this whole thread it's interesting the directions it has taken. A lot of people have definately had an exposed nerve tweaked for sure. The way I've read it is that the OP was wondering if too much accomodation could be a bad thing?
That's something I've often thought about, and have had discussions with my partner who is also on the spectrum. We had a friend who was also diagnosed around the same time as we were. They took that diagnosis to mean they didn't have to try anymore, and consequently became a huge jerk. They decided that as they were autistic, they had carte blanch to basically drop all the social niceties. We tried to speak to them about it, but they wouldn't listen and continued to be a jerk. Hence ex-friend.
So I do wonder how much being over-accommodated as a child will stop someone from actually achieving their true potential. If having large allowances made rather than encouraging coping mechanisms and gaining knowledge about how to function in a world full of people who dont think like us could actually be damaging and setting those folks up to fail. I'm not talking about everyone here. It's a spectrum, and some people simply aren't capable of learning those things so should certainly be supported by society.
I was in my late 30s when I was diagnosed. I was fortunate in that I had a mum who was very patient and would at least pretend (pretty convincingly) to be interested when I was yakking away about my current obsession, and a large a rambling extended family meant I always had someone to play with, even if the kids at school thought I was weird and didn't like me. That said, I've had regular issues connected to aspie traits both at work and socially. I've ended up in meetings with HR on many occasions- though less since I was diagnosed.
I think that maybe the public focus is so much on autistic kids, because of "aww look at that poor wee guy, of course i will donate to your charity" and also maybe because NT parents of ASD kids are more successful at socially supporting one another and shouting for what they need?
I reckon there's also a psychological factor at work- if someone feels superior to someone else, they may be condescending which then reads to us as being treated like children.
Sorry, this has turned into a bit of a ramble.
TL;DR
Yes I think autistic people are being increasingly infantilised as an unintended byproduct of increased advocacy and awareness, and that many people still believe that if you are autistic, you are broken. Which is not true.
I think it would be better for autistic adults as well as for NT workload if workplaces returned to what they used to be in terms of formality.
I'm no fan of Britishness but - it used to be seen as American to be as cheesy & glib & superficial as modern day workplaces expect.
Reserved Brits and dour Scots, wouldn't be hugging colleagues, obsessed over constant smiles, gossiping and not getting on with thier work.
And there was a place for a 'quirky' workmate in certain professions. My stepdad has more stereotypically autistic personality traits than me, despite not being diagnosed. He worked in the same workplace as a lecturer since the 80s and was always known as 'harmlessly eccentric'. As he didn't know the social cues etc and was pretending to play cricket in the hallways and doing voices to himself and really getting into character whenever he read a character in a novel The modern lecturer isn't allowed to act like that, it wouldn't be seen as socially acceptable anymore and they'd likely get in trouble despite doing nothing wrong. He's been working in that job since the 80s and between that and his strictness on students is seen as a bit of a 'remnant'.
Ironically one thing I found hard about volunteering in a job that was once a paid job (librarian's assistant) was not working. The amount of breaks, the amount of gossiping during working hours, the pressure to be cool and normal. The expectation that you would hate the work and that talking was not only great for a library but something the assistants themselves should do. The dismissive hate of books, within a library, if they were too high brow. Since I've been on ESA, I've been able to work hard on my 'projects' without dealing with such distractions & nonsense.
I think the idea that if someone doesn't work they'll goof off and watch TV/search SM and do nothing else is based on experience of NTs. NTs need external pressure to work or they socialise, goof off and lounge about. In fact, they still do that when they're 'working'.
We don't do that. We have our interests & some of them are academic or artistic or worthwhile etc. Only reason we need to work professional jobs is to get cash.
One thing that would be good is if the government could figure out some autistic people who have specialist interests & hire them for research etc. Maybe in museums, behind the scenes type work.
Autistic people are very different to NTs and just because we're a minority doesn't mean we're worthless or should be expected to mask and fit in. Doing that is bad for our mental health.
I think in modern years, over the last half century, there has been increasing focus on making careers easier for extrovert, socially intelligent, academically less intelligent NTs and we should really be just trying to shift towards the centre a bit more. I think there's NTs who'd find that shift in focus useful, too.
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