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Fnord
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04 Aug 2022, 11:41 am

babybird wrote:
Thank you Fnord.
You are welcome, as always!
babybird wrote:
You've made some really interesting examples of how aspergers can really work for a person. I suppose you have to be in the right place for this though.

From what I've seen on WP it is quite a common thing for aspies to be straight to the point. Whereas none's would be more likely to skirt around, make hints and tiptoe around a subject.

I remember the fuss that was made when my ex boss was firing me. It took her about an hour and then a deliberation and then she was crying. I'd have had it all said and done and had me out of the door before I even had chance to sit down in the meeting room.

Maybe being able to play to your autistic strengths is dependent on who you are and at what stage of your life you are in.
Maybe for some . . . but there was a moment of epiphany when, as a "tween", I realized that no-one really cared, and that if I was ever going to live independently, then I was the only one who could make it happen.

Sure, I was not always nice about it; and certainly, there were people with bruised egos that I left along the way; but a person has to be a bit ruthless and self-serving to make it in the world.  Reliance on the kindness of family, friends, and strangers will only lead to disappointment and misery, in my opinion.



babybird
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04 Aug 2022, 11:42 am

Twilightprincess wrote:
I think that philosophical outlooks can change through various environmental factors, like education. This may be more likely if one was raised in a qqqqqless-than-ideal environment.


Definitely. I didn't get much of an education when I was younger. I did have a philosophy on life but I didn't know the words to use to apply to it. Going to college as an adult not only gave me the words but it also taught me so much more about people, the world, and a load more other stuff.


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Last edited by babybird on 04 Aug 2022, 11:43 am, edited 1 time in total.

KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 11:42 am

babybird wrote:
KitLily wrote:
Naturally, I like to get straight to the point. However, I've found that causes shock, anger, hurt etc. especially in women. So I tend to hold back and censor myself. Yet I'm STILL accused of being blunt, rude etc.

It is really annoying and frustrating. I think I will start getting straight to the point, see how they like that! 'You thought I was blunt before, now what do you think?' :lol:


I think you make it your half way through the year resolution. See how it works out for you.


See how quickly I get murdered :lol: :lol:


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KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 11:46 am

Fnord wrote:
Reliance on the kindness of family, friends, and strangers will only lead to disappointment and misery, in my opinion.[/color]


I've actually found strangers to be far and away kinder and more helpful than family and friends. Some have (unknowingly) helped me through difficult times e.g. a stranger listened to all my problems on the bus one day just because she was a kind woman. Other strangers picked me up when I put my foot in a pothole in the street and severely twisted my ankle, they called a taxi for me and the taxi driver wouldn't let me pay for the journey(it was only a short drive but still)


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kraftiekortie
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04 Aug 2022, 11:46 am

I envision Kit, somehow, sitting outside on a porch/verandah type thing, just pondering things. There might be lemonade in a large pitcher, and a few glasses for anybody who wants some.

I did that earlier, actually. I was in a park known as Alley Pond Park, sitting on a park bench. I just laid back and watched the sky. I was fortunate it was in a shady spot, since it's in the low 30's Celsius with high humidity right now.



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04 Aug 2022, 11:47 am

Yep....definitely nice of the people who helped you out of that pothole----and the taxi driver.

The world isn't all doom and gloom!



KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 11:47 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
I envision Kit, somehow, sitting outside on a porch/verandah type thing, just pondering things. There might be lemonade in a large pitcher, and a few glasses for anybody who wants some.


That does sound nice and how life used to be when it moved slower and people had time to talk.


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babybird
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04 Aug 2022, 11:49 am

KitLily wrote:
babybird wrote:
KitLily wrote:
Naturally, I like to get straight to the point. However, I've found that causes shock, anger, hurt etc. especially in women. So I tend to hold back and censor myself. Yet I'm STILL accused of being blunt, rude etc.

It is really annoying and frustrating. I think I will start getting straight to the point, see how they like that! 'You thought I was blunt before, now what do you think?' :lol:


I think you make it your half way through the year resolution. See how it works out for you.


See how quickly I get murdered :lol: :lol:


Well at least you would be giving them a good reason to not like you :wink:


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Fnord
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04 Aug 2022, 11:52 am

KitLily wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Reliance on the kindness of family, friends, and strangers will only lead to disappointment and misery, in my opinion.
I've actually found strangers to be far and away kinder and more helpful than family and friends. Some have (unknowingly) helped me through difficult times e.g. a stranger listened to all my problems on the bus one day just because she was a kind woman. Other strangers picked me up when I put my foot in a pothole in the street and severely twisted my ankle, they called a taxi for me and the taxi driver wouldn't let me pay for the journey(it was only a short drive but still)
The kindness of strangers is a wonderful thing; but it is the reliance on that kindness that gets one in trouble.



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04 Aug 2022, 11:55 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
Yep....definitely nice of the people who helped you out of that pothole----and the taxi driver.

The world isn't all doom and gloom!


Yes that was a frightening day because I couldn't walk to fetch my daughter from primary school. It was a cold, dark winter day. The mobile phones had also stopped working for some reason. But again, I managed to phone another mum and she brought my daughter home in her car with her own kids. So another kind person. A scary day turned okay in the end.


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kraftiekortie
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04 Aug 2022, 11:56 am

I believe in many "old-fashioned" virtues-----though I believe a lot of bad crap happened in the "old days."

In essence, I believe in adopting the good "old-fashioned" virtues, while not indulging in the crap.

I don't believe in the cynicism of these times, even though there's "justification" for it.



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04 Aug 2022, 11:58 am

Fnord wrote:
The kindness of strangers is a wonderful thing; but it is the reliance on that kindness that gets one in trouble.


You're not wrong.

In general though, if someone is in dire trouble, it is strangers who step in to help. Numerous examples of strangers helping each other in terrorist attacks, natural disasters etc.

Humans are the only animal I can think of who will risk their lives to save a stranger in trouble e.g. mountain rescue, various ship races.


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KitLily
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04 Aug 2022, 12:00 pm

babybird wrote:
KitLily wrote:
See how quickly I get murdered :lol: :lol:


Well at least you would be giving them a good reason to not like you :wink:


Yes, instead of the vague 'she's a bit weird.' It would be 'she's very blunt.' Which is in fact less of a vice!


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04 Aug 2022, 12:01 pm

I don't think being weird is a vice. It's positive IMO. The world would be a boring place if everyone was normal.



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04 Aug 2022, 12:02 pm

It's my nature to believe in the "glass half-full" theorem.

If they don't like it, tough nuggies!



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04 Aug 2022, 12:03 pm

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away."