Autism and empathy

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I haven't watched a news broadcast since 9/11.
That likely explains why I'm so out of the loop all the time.
I like being in my clueless bubble so I don't have to worry about the whole world at once.

Eh.

I'm screwed enough to feel that the idea of war excites me than worries me.
The same can be said whenever there's a huge possibility of societal collapse.

Logically, I should at least worry for others. Irrationally, I'm not.

I'd rather feel nothing, admit that I'm in a bubble or flat out admit that I do not have empathy -- instead, I might have something worse than just "lacking empathy"...

But then I must've hate the so-called world and the human society so much, that I react like this.

I refuse to feel sick and sad for the sufferers, instead I tend (and rather) to feel wrath and contempt toward those who instigates.

At least I do not pretend to understand if I couldn't. I don't pretend to sympathize if I won't.

All the same I myself am sick of 'reacting'. Sick of people 'reacting'.

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I gave up watching live television (especially the news) decades ago, and never regretted it. I don't see myself as the world's keeper, and I don't see there's much I can do about it when it keeps going wrong. I just look at the occasional news website, mostly to keep abreast of matters that might directly affect me, such as transport strikes when I'm travelling. I've never seen it as anybody's duty to make the world a better place, just to try not to do any appreciable harm. And I see compassion as being mostly a local matter. Dad used to say that people aren't programmed to take in the cares of the whole wide world. He may have been correct.

My (NT) cousin plays football in a team and it means a lot to her. One of her best friends (NT) was criticising her yesterday, because she couldn't get how important football is to her. She (the friend) saw it as "just a silly game", which upset my cousin because to her the game and the team is important.
They are best friends and agree on a lot of things but when it comes to football the friend just can't understand why football means so much, simply because she (the friend) isn't as fanatic about football as my cousin is.

It isn't unusual for people to only see some things from their own perspectives, which is why I despise people associating that with autism.

^ Football was my life for a long time, looking back I think it was a special interest. My girlfriend back then was a 'football widow' as footie always came first

Sometimes I feel left out when the community pushes "Autistics DO have empathy! Lots of it! All of them!" because I am kind of a stereotypical "high-functioning" one who has pretty low empathy.

Supposedly.
The inconsistency lies with the autism subtypes.

Subtypes that does have low empathy, low social affect or/and has higher alexithymic traits.

Then there's subtypes that has a lot of emotional sensitivities, prone to emotional contagion or/and is relatively leaning towards socialization as a reward.


And then there's the ones that lies outside the dichotomy;
Ones with widely different context and perceptions (very prone to misunderstandings), ones that developmental disabilities so severe one has zero social instincts (usually intellectually disabled)

Then there's the ones that has no internal regulation whatsoever and remains as if they're "egocentric" when they're chuck full of unfulfilled needs; are 'egocentric' because they cannot ignore their thoughts, their feelings over others'.
And then when they don't have those unfulfilled needs, they suddenly 'stop' being 'egocentric'.

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