How dare they discriminate against Aspergers?

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Positive thinking does indeed create more positive results. Using negative approaches to create positive thinking styles seems to create negative thinking rather then the intended positive thoughts. The idea is positive reinforcement and positive self-resilience.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_resilience

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bullying

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reinforcement

I've never really noticed. Most of my really intense failures were preceded by some pretty positive thinking.

Seriously, though, I did go into detail about my own impairments and historical problems. It's hard to explain how understanding what happened in these situations is actually a positive for me, rather than a negative. I don't talk about these things because of self-indulgence or self-pity, but because I have tried for so long to make sense of them and now I have, at least to some extent. The not knowing contributed heavily to my depression, and the knowing contributed heavily to its remission.

Yep, I've noticed this. When I feel unduly confident that I passed a test, I almost inevitably seem to fail it, whereas when I lack such assuredness, I almost always seem to pass it. And, just recently, I thought I was feeling quite positive about my involvement in the software group last quarter and I thought the amount of work I put into the project would've surely ensured the 4.0 that I was aiming for. What happened? They failed me. I can only assume a lack of communication from being too focused on work was responsible for their evaluation. (Or "lack of good communication" from whatever other origin.)

Or maybe my hair was too long at the time (It was shoulder-length whereas the clear norm for guys is at or above the ears.)? As much as I'd like to think people in college computer science aren't that shallow, I wonder how much it really influences perceptions and thinking.

Yeah, when I get positive about something I sometimes let my guard down and things fall apart.

I've had that happen a lot. I actually had my purse stolen out from under my nose practically because I was in a really good mood and not wary at all - and I also have a tendency to be somewhat trusting. That led to a meltdown in the store I was working at right at the owner in front of customers. Fun stuff.

When you are happy and you know it clap your hands.

When you're aware that genetic factors determine your neurobiological factors that determine 50% of your happiness and you know that society values an emotional state that's beyond your control to choose and you know it, clap your hands.

Last edited by swbluto on 20 May 2011, 1:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Well at least it is not a funny resulting in a pull my finger joke.

[quote="Verdandi"]I've never really noticed. Most of my really intense failures were preceded by some pretty positive thinking.

I agree and have experienced the same thing, and the thing for me that is different now is that I try to be more authentic and forgiving of myself for whatever "flaws" (real or imagined), whereas in the past I spent a lot of energy trying to hide (even from myself) or contain things, even tightly control in some instances. This creates tension in itself, and when behaving in this "mode" there is also the constant fear of not putting up the right front, letting something "weird" slip, etc. In a few work situations that happened, I didn't understand what I had done or said, but it was like being 13 again and getting actually picked on, yelled at, made fun of, sneered at. Those things happening in a work setting really were hard.
We all have our own paths to follow, and for me, what works, what keeps me in a positive frame of mind about myself, my place, where I might go from here, is a kind of internal belligerent attitude, a kind of "fU, you don't own the world" attitude toward those that I find myself fearful of.

Hard to explain, but for me, it comes down to a foundation of acceptance of anything about myself rather than the shame attached to trying to keep things under wraps, I make fewer apologies about being asocial, I stand up for myself more. Affirmations of the type "I may be lacking in this and that, but that doesn't mean squat, because I have all these other great qualities, talents, abilities, experiences".

Playing mind games with oneself simply to coexist may not be healthy for everyone.

I'm not ashamed of who or what I am. This is why I can talk about my history and just be honest about it, rather than engage in recriminations against myself as I did when I did not understand what had happened. Unfortunately, my past not only informs me of how and where I had difficulties, but what many of my limitations are. I am trying to work out ways to cope with those limitations, but some of them seem fairly intractable.

Really, what I should stop doing is caring what random people on the internet assess my ability to work to be.

We are people too and we are sick of these scum bag employers not giving us a fair go.
We are more than capable of doing these jobs more productively than people without Aspergers. Empowerment for Aspergers as we fight for social justice and equality.

20th century was the century of change and equal rights and opportunity for people regardless of race, religion and gender. The 21st century is the time for people with disabilities to stand up and fight for their rights.

Instinct is much like a math.

Mind games, funny. What on earth do you thing all this "poor pitiful me" stuff is? It's all internal dialogue and decisions, why not make ones that benefit?
Or maybe some people get a little too much out of NOT trying.

We have choices, some thing are within our control. How we feel and how we choose to see things are one of the things we can control.

I think someday you will understand why your life is not the same as everyones else's and just how hateful you come off to be. People who try to make what people with disabilities say into meaningless efforts to make others feel sorry for them as pity seem to many times lack aspects of being human. I do welcome you to continue alienating yourself but I for one won't just read your bull and keep my mouth shut.

You would like very much for myself and others to keep silent out of fear of emotional put downs. Just keep at it because it's the likes of you that will be a dedicated chapter in my book. Give me some more with some responses. Learning self-respect and respect for others does not always come with age but growing older being a cold hearted man or women is your own loss.

I'm sorry, what "poor pitiful me" stuff? So no one is ever supposed to talk about how their life didn't go according to plan, only about the parts that have, and the parts that could? That even mentioning it is a plea for attention and pity?

I mainly bring it up because I am tired of people who insist that they know that I can work because I can do some arbitrary thing that they think reflects not just a possible skill, but also the capacity to apply that skill for several hours a day, the capacity to find that job and get hired for it. It's amazing how people think they can discern everything they need to know about a person just from a small number of facts.

So you say "I think you could work," and I say "No, this is what happened when I tried to work," and then you call my explanation "poor, pitiful me." Where did I write in my posts that I wanted pity? Is it there explicitly? I thought I said the opposite last night. I suck at putting subtext into things, you know? Why are you trying to read subtext into it? Why is your interpretation so important it must override what I actually said?

Fake Aspies go around broadcasting to the world they are proud that they have Aspergers and make videos claiming they have Aspergers by acting like ret*ds. Fake Aspies are just Emo kids acting like idiots. Fake aspies are just attention seekers.

Real Aspies would not go around claiming they have Aspergers. They would be ashamed they are different to others and struggle silently with their condition.