Do you feel you fit in WP???

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I think you missed when I said "not necessarily in activity but in actual focus. Like do a lot of members only go to this area?" Since they take so little time to respond to, the fact that there is always a huge number of them in the recently updated list doesn't really indicate much other than- ok so people don't hate them.

I guess to try to be more clear: are a large number of users forsaking all or most other parts of the board to ONLY post in these game/number sections? That's what I don't know.

I mean, even if that is the case I don't feel I'm missing much.

I feel like I fit in fine. I feel that some other people here don't want me to fit in, self-diagnosis blah blah blah. :p

I'm happy here. I enjoy reading about people's stuffed animal friends, great stims and watching people help one another. it's nice.

oh...i'm not saying everyone should get along or anything. although sometimes people can seem snappy or rude i have seen in other posts, once again i think that's just the nature of a forum. i dont think that's a thing that could change completely. maybe i should have worded my post better, it seems to be getting misinterpreted. (my fault )


i think the reason i'm hesitant to stay longer is purely personal, that's just the kind of person i am. i never hang around the same place too long. i think it's just restlessness. i already feel like i've shared too much and been on wp way too much.


and i agree, you are awesome! you and a few other posters are the ones i recognize the most i think.

Ah, ok.
Well, I'm the queen of "what are you saying to me!?" so really, sometimes it could just be that some other people may be more likely interpret things leaning a certain way or as having to do with a specific subject more often. I think I'm probably prone to do that at times.

To some extent I understand the feeling of not wanting to share too much. I don't tend to share very much about my life personally on here in terms of specifics other than general stuff which I kind of expand upon: "I'm sick, it's chronic" "I have a boyfriend, I like him!", "Im grouchy so now I'm in The Haven complaining cause everything is STOOPID".

also thanks. :]

I don't really think of fitting in here or not. If I have something to say, I post it.

Yes and no because not sure if have ASD or not. Much of what everyone talks about I can relate to so that says to me that I fit in. No since I may have NVLD which is not on the ASD.

I probably don't fit in here yet I find it rather compelling to post here??

Oh fiddlesticks! you stole my thunder!

I sometimes feel like i do,sometimes i dont know especially since i dont realy know if im on the spectrum or not but i feel like like its a good place,there is a lot of positive.
I sometimes feel left out or ignored but i have to supose that its just my negativity and often i myself dont know what to reply or that i cant compete in the conversation,so i try to not let it get to me.

It's nice to be able to relate to people with a similar diagnosis since it is hard for others to understand what we go through, but besides that I find myself feeling like I just don't relate to the people here beyond that.

Initially I thought I don't fit in here. To be honest the first impression I got from this forum is "messy" and "disorganized". People are are so different from each other a lot of the time it's hard to relate to anybody. I often feel more accepted at NT dominant forums (and by NT people). But then we're supposed to be all different. As I learned more and understand better I got more comfortable here. Being an extroverted aspie, I'll probably never fit in too well, but it's pretty close to other forums I frequent.

I seem to fit in quite well on the Random Discussion and Off The Wall forums. There's a sort of "inner core" in the latter forum, who dedicate threads to each other and use them for general chat, but I'm far too much of an "outsider" (psychologically speaking) ever to want to be part of something like that, though all the participants seem to be very nice people.

I've been less successful in my infrequent forays into PPR, but that's probably because I state my views very brusquely, without being bothered to develop an argument. I've also been disappointed from time to time with the lack of response to one or two posts in General Autism, and have wondered if things might have been different if I had "Have Aspergers: Diagnosed" in my profile. But that's almost certainly a bit paranoid!

No. I feel like something is broken inside me. As if all the time I'm making some mistake no matter what. Worried that if someone did grow a fondness towards me it'd be short lived. I want to care and be cared about but it's too much. Disappointing people can be harder than never having anyone notice you to begin with. Like Icarus soaring to the sky and then the sun melts his wings. I wish I could just not care. I wish I wasn't emotional. Well, maybe I don't actually want that, but if I was different maybe I'd be better for other people. Maybe I could make them happy. It's nobody's fault I don't fit in here or the other places I go... I just can't fit with other people.

Compared to Wikimapia (before it's forum was abandoned), yes I feel a whole lot more at home here, it's full of activity even after existing longer and having bugs.
Politics was something that wasn't appropriate on WM, the PPR and news sections were something I really needed.
The games and random section was something that WM stopped having in 2012 that I missed.
It is well moderated and there is no worry of me dealing with rogue moderators (there were many at WM).
Last but not least it's an AS forum, many users have what I have.

I don't visit WP much these days, but I used to, and mostly I felt I was accepted very well. It took a little while, but people began to respond to my posts (around one post in five would attract a reply) and I had a lot of very stimulating and friendly discussions with them. I was a little bit embarrassed to find myself going into dialogue on the forums with this or that poster, to the point where we'd sometimes dominate the entire topic and maybe annoy others, but I never got any flak for that. I was impressed with the standard of intelligence and felt very flattered when they complimented me on some of the points I made. I liked those people and they liked me. It became the major part of my social life for a few years, and it felt wonderfully safe because I didn't have to physically meet the people, and because I'm much stronger with the written word than I am with the spoken word. I often felt a great sense of empathy with fellow Aspies.

The only time I felt like a leper round here was quite brief, when I accidentally confused the "in-depth adult life discussion" forum with the "adult autism issues" forum. It soon became clear that the latter was completely the wrong place for me, as the values expressed there were sometimes quite alien to some strongly-held values of my own. I meant no harm, but somehow must have deeply offended a few people by airing my views too strongly for their sensibilities, and one or two of them were quite nasty about it. I still don't know quite what the fuss was about. I remember being in trouble after speaking out against porn feminism, I was shocked at how a couple of people then construed everything I said as misogyny and passive aggression. I mentioned in passing that hormones have a lot to answer for when it comes to sex, but one poster must have thought I was taking a swipe at them in a "women's views are irrational because of their hormones" kind of way, which wasn't what I'd said or meant at all. I was surprised that they were trying to read between my lines instead of taking me literally, because Aspies are usually so literal. I'm sure I've said the same kind of things on other forums here and nobody reacted badly. Frankly I felt like John Lennon must have felt after his comment about the Beatles being more popular than Jesus, if you know the story.

But apart from that couple of brief, pointless skirmishes on the adult autism section, things have always been sweet here for me. I was really pleased when people sent me friendly private messages out of the blue just because they were interested in me. Basically I'm a shy person and I never once dared to send a PM to anybody unless they'd invited me to, so it was nice of them to do the running like that. One guy turned out to live near to me and we met up and had a good hour or two talking. Another one invited me to join her own Aspie forum. Even better, I developed online relationships with two members of WP (not both at the same time, I hasten to add), and the second one of those turned into a "real" relationship which is still going so well after a year or two that we're now hoping to get married. What more can I say? I'd donate money to the place, but I quit my job a while back and have vowed never to work for an employer ever again, even if I could find one, so all I have to give is my thanks and seal of approval.

Why and how all this good stuff happened to me here is a mystery. I didn't plan it. I don't think I'm an unusual person, and certainly I'm no social phenomenon. I think with a bit of calm patience and perseverance, anybody with an Aspie mentality and a bit of applied empathy and compassion could fit in very well here. I saw a lot of supportiveness, like the time when one lady was under attack for her obsessional interest and they defended her without any hope of getting anything out of it for themselves. I haven't seen a lot of that kind of thing out in the "real" world.

I know Transyl's feeling of (I presume) being afraid of starting friendships and then not being able to live up to their expectations. I tend to keep people at arm's length for the same reason, and I shouldn't, because people are usually quite forgiving, and it usually does little harm to at least take a breather from them when the social fatigue sets in. I think most Aspies would understand, and at the end of the day, even if you do finally lose a friend, it's got to be better than not making a friend at all. You even have a right to dump people if it's not working for you, and there are ways of letting them down gently. But you probably know that intellectually. I hope you come to know it emotionally as well, so that you won't take it so hard if you disappoint people occasionally.

just wanted to say, that was a really interesting, insightful and good post ToughDiamond! thank you for sharing!!