asked friend for help & he got mad cuz I didn't understand

Post Reply New Topic

I am extremely young even though I am almost 50. Emotionally my age ranges from 4 to 12 and mentally, probably around 15 or or even 12 even though intellectually I can be my chronological age. I think there is a slight difference between mentally and intellectually in how I see them. To me they feel different. That might make no sense at all so I will have to research and see if there is a technical difference. But my age ranges and functionality levels are all over the place and very situation specific. That is why the "very high functioning" label for me can be extremely deceiving and many times quite inaccurate. Some things I can do very well that are expected of a 48 year old person. Other things I can't do at all and I do them at a 4 to 12 or 15 year old age level.

What you said is very interesting to me, about how you maturity and competency level can differ depending on the areas of life. In some areas you can be very capable and perform same or even better than most NTs and in other areas you fall way behind. I feel the same about 'high functioning' label as well, its a bit general. I actually had this idea to design a new chart system that'll better demonstrate the complex aspects of Autism and AS, one for each.

For AS for example, It might involve the primary colors as representing the most prominent aspect of AS, and when this primary colors mix with one another, they will represent the different trait and characteristics that a particular person with AS might display. Also the chart might include something to represent the degree or severity of any given trait. It's just an idea, maybe someone can develop it and take it to another level.

I feel like I'm sixty even though I'm a young adult, but other times I feel and act like a little kid.

I once read an article about why doctors are late to see their own patients sometimes and I couldn't believe someone had to write it because I thought everyone knew why a doctor would be late. People sometimes need all their questions answered so they take up their time and the doctor goes past their time leaving their next patient waiting and emergencies happen where they are needed by their patient, and sometimes things get backed up if there are lot of patients and I couldn't believe someone wouldn't know this so they needed an article to be written for them to read so they will know something that was so obvious I thought. While I was reading it I thought "I thought everyone knew this, do people actually not know why a doctor would get behind in seeing them? I can't believe this had to be written." People keep surprising me.

Same here, I remember growing up, I used to be able to hold proper conversations with adults and they would tell me I was mature for my age. Now that i'm an adult, the opposite is the case sometimes. Its fascinating to me, how much of this is an AS trait and how much of it just personality. But again, how do you tell apart personality from an AS trait.

Yes that was funny, but my post she is talking about is the eighth post on page four.

Thanks for that, I was just sitting here thinking "oh no now I have to go digging through the thread to find it and my computer's being kind of slow tonight" and then BAM you gave instructions directly to it. Much appreciated!

On a different note, I laughed out loud reading what Mirage said about when people tell you that you talk like such a little grown-up when you're a kid, but somewhere along the line you get to a point where people think you talk more like a kid, once you're an adult. Makes me wonder where that age is then... somewhere around 20ish maybe? adult yet still kid?

Which reminds me of something that made me SO MAD. I shouldn't even think about it. I'm not in for getting all worked up. But briefly. I'll just say that my son's principal called me to be a very mean and un-understanding jerk about my middle son who had to have supports during his schooling and had an IEP and all that fun stuff, and when I tried to respond to him and have a two-sided conversation with him he actually told me that he would speak to me when I"m ready to converse like an adult and HUNG UP ON ME.

HUNG.

UP.

ON ME.

I guess he wanted a one-sided conversation where the parent listens to the principal put her child down and underestimate him while simultaneously overestimating him in areas that are clearly already laid out in his IEP but which are swiftly ignored and forgotten about. We wont even mention the fact they said he couldn't' use an iPad as a support for his bad joints and handwriting issues because they didn't want him to stand out and be different than other kids because their whole goal is to make all the special ed kids blend in seamlessly with the others.

And when they don't they send them away to the school for troubled kids, where they carry kids in meltdown mode with their hands held behind their backs and ankles held together into a "quiet room" and shut the door and the adult stands outside and watches through the window while the child "cools off" ... I'm not even kidding. When my boy got kicked out of that one as well for refusing to be treated that way during a meltdown, which was already written into his IEP that he was allowed to walk and cool off and come back, and then he told the administrator what he could go do to himself when that wasn't honored, he got sent to the school for the criminal kids.

The second he turned 16 I helped him get his GED and got him out of school altogether. Poor kid. I didn't know what else to do. I hope my daughter fares better under that same principal. She's in that school now. She's only 12. *sigh* She knows to behave or else he'll send her to those same schools too and nobody deserves that.

I just about went down there and wrapped the phone cord around his "indistinguishable" little neck. D**k.

Cheer up! Not every principal in the world is like that! I have an IEP too, and hardly any of my teachers even bothered to read it, and let's not get started on my nightmarish Grade 11 English Teacher...

Ugh, I hope that you're not dealing with anyone nightmarish right now (not sure if you're still in grade 11 or not by how you wrote it ), I'm glad my boys are out of school now and my daughter is having no problems so far.

Thankfully, everything's fine with me now and I'm in Grade 12. Hopefully my Grade 12 teacher will be nice. The main problem was how strict [read: perfectionist] my Grade 11 teacher was and how there was no creativity whatsoever in her class. Oddly enough, she seems to like me, even though I don't like her.

I only quoted part of your post, but I am replying to it all. What happened to your son is terrible, and that principal sounds like an absolute jerk! I had an IEP in school, too, and some things were actually done and others weren't. I eventually managed to get into the homebound program and graduated from it. I hope things do go better for your daughter!

If you don't mind me saying so, I like how nice you are, Quill.

Aw, thank you! I like that you're nice, too!