Please Help Me Help My Potentially Autistic Brother
I am worried about my younger brother - he is 28 years old, and has not been able to get a job of any sort for 5+ years. He tries so hard to get employed (applying / interviewing everywhere he can, taking additional coursework, getting professional resume help, etc.), and it breaks my heart to see him fail time and time again. He is a college graduate, but can't get hired at places like a coffee shop or music store. I'm also worried about his long term future if he can't be self sufficient.
I've always known my brother was different - he was diagnosed as a child with Learning Disabilities and ADHD, he had a very difficult time making friends, and he struggled to fit in at school. But he is a great guy, he is smart when it comes to fields he is interested in, and he can be a loyal, hard worker. I've always considered him to be "eccentric". As I mentioned, he was able to get an undergraduate degree in music from a state school, even though it took him 7 years or so. I think it has gotten to the point in his life where seeking employment using traditional methods may not work, since I don't think he can succesfully get through an interview.
I've read several articles on autism recently, and many of the stories and charactistics described are similar to my brother's personality. Specifically, he seems to fall into the category of someone with Aspergers or high-functioning autism. It is my hope that if my brother can get support and advice from a community who face similar challenges, he may learn to find a way to overcome those challenges. However, I'm not in position to diagnose him, and therin lies my first question:
1. How does an adult find out, i.e. get evaluated, for autism?
2. I don't know if, or how, I can approach my brother with this topic - any advice? The last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings.
Any help or feedback you can provide would be greatly appreciated.
mikemmlj
Pileated woodpecker
Joined: 13 Mar 2009
Age: 53
Gender: Male
Posts: 193
Location: Albuquerque, NM
Biggest tip on any job application: lie thru your teeth, and tell 'em what they want to hear.
I know...it goes against our basic morals to lie, but understand something simple: the majority of people in this world are lousy capitalists, and like most others like buying into fantasy, not reality.
Once he's hired, and shows he can do a good job, THEN he can admit his Autism. In fact, don't even put it on the application that he has it; I have Scoliosis, but never mention that it could hold me back. If I were to do that, I'd be a "dead" man.
I've always known my brother was different - he was diagnosed as a child with Learning Disabilities and ADHD, he had a very difficult time making friends, and he struggled to fit in at school. But he is a great guy, he is smart when it comes to fields he is interested in, and he can be a loyal, hard worker. I've always considered him to be "eccentric". As I mentioned, he was able to get an undergraduate degree in music from a state school, even though it took him 7 years or so. I think it has gotten to the point in his life where seeking employment using traditional methods may not work, since I don't think he can succesfully get through an interview.
I've read several articles on autism recently, and many of the stories and charactistics described are similar to my brother's personality. Specifically, he seems to fall into the category of someone with Aspergers or high-functioning autism. It is my hope that if my brother can get support and advice from a community who face similar challenges, he may learn to find a way to overcome those challenges. However, I'm not in position to diagnose him, and therin lies my first question:
1. How does an adult find out, i.e. get evaluated, for autism?
2. I don't know if, or how, I can approach my brother with this topic - any advice? The last thing I want to do is hurt his feelings.
Any help or feedback you can provide would be greatly appreciated.
I would say it depends on what part of the spectrum he is on. I would also hope you can define what you mean by self sufficient.
_________________
A person that does not think he has problems already has one-Me
surveys are scientific, they have numbers in them- me (satire)
I rarely got work through the interview process. I mainly went for 'bulk hiring' jobs like public transport and public service which didn't use interviews at that time (i'm an older person), although that may have changed. Mostly I could only get casual or temp work. I only got full time work thru sitting for the public service exam. I also did some driving jobs as it doesn't involve people contact, or not much. I don't know that aspies always have the luxury of being able to choose to work in their preferred fields, sometimes you just have to take what you can get. He could also try volunteer work, that can lead to paid work.
As regards mentioning the subject of AS with him, I suppose there's lots of ways, leave some pamphlets lying around (the local autism ass'n should have some)... there's always the "I was reading this article...etc etc
Last edited by Postperson on 02 Jun 2009, 4:49 am, edited 1 time in total.
Regarding employment: this is a very familiar story for those with ASD. I think it's worth letting him know of your suspicions so that he can investigate it and understand his situation better, or rule certain things out.
Before being evaluated, it's best he does his own research to determine whether he might fall on the autism spectrum. This can be done using tests online, such as the Autism Spectrum Quotient (AQ):
http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/9.12/aqtest.html
By reading the DSM-IV and other criteria for AS and autism, others' accounts of living with AS/HFA (e.g., on discussion forums), and various other sources, as well as asking family members about his development, he can get some idea of whether he would benefit from a professional diagnosis. Having a good basic knowledge of autism is conducive to making an informed decision about how to proceed and promotes self-advocacy.
If he decides to obtain a diagnosis, it will take some research to find a suitably qualified and experienced professional. There are relatively few ASD specialists familiar with diagnosing adults. However, this is a necessity. General psychiatrists and other practitioners are unsuitable for assessing ASD. Hardly a day goes by where someone doesn't post about their bad experiences in trying to obtain a diagnosis from them; they are generally dismissed or misdiagnosed. Therefore, locating an ASD specialist in your area (or if not, outside your area) who is experienced with adults would be a must.
Any help or feedback you can provide would be greatly appreciated.
It depends what kind of person he is, really. If he is quite open-minded, it might be best to just tell him outright and have some information printed out for him. Also emphasise the gifts and positives.
not sure if you are in the US or Canada. As far as I know, that's where Bender consulting operates.
try calling about any job and any location in the 2 countries, not just in the word doc link. the founder is epileptic and is an advocate
http://www.benderconsult.com/index2.html
the word doc link:
http://www.loyola.edu/campuslife/health ... ties_1.doc
This is a company that hires people w/disabilities including invisible disabilities which is what HFA is/usually is I think. AS generally as well I think? But I guess in some/many cases AS can be severe. also mood disorders can be filed under "hidden disabilities".
from a yahoo group:
Ms. Bender is the Chair of the (national) Epilepsy Foundation and an advocate
for hidden disabilities in the workplace.
Bender Consulting Services is currently hiring bright, enthusiastic individuals
with disabilities to work with the Federal government in the Washington, DC
Metro area, Philadelphia, PA, Harrisburg, PA and other areas across the United
States. Click here for more information. (also hire for private corps)
I did speak with the contact. I mentioned I had a hidden disability. she
mentioned some mood disorders. you'd have to ask her about AS specifically as
she did not mention that as an example if I remember correctly.
Haven't mentioned what my disability is yet.
I've had a few interviews and now the recruiters have sent out my resume to one
company.
also maybe try voc rehab though some have bad luck with that and some state voc rehab isn't necessarily set up for dealing with those with AS/HFA.
_________________
All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.
-HL Mencken
-as of now official dx is ADHD (inattentive type) but said ADD (314.00) on the dx paper, PDD-NOS and was told looks like I have NLD
the highest unemployment crisis is with young white males -- in most western countries....
and with the economy n unemployment ... hell, that's the way it is.
White young males will find it easier to get work in real work like labouring and process working... has he considered an apprenticeship?
face it he's too picky and only wants to play playstation.
Another problem with long term youth unemployed is when they do finally get a job they usually don't mesh into the working world too well.
This nothing to do with ur brother, its actually a pretty large crisis in the westen world.
_________________
Chickens have feathers, Like eggs have shells...being tickled can hurt.
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