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AlMightyAl
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04 Jun 2009, 9:38 pm

I'm getting tired of the threads titled "I don't like doing this!" and "I don't like doing that!".
Some people here seem to think having Aspergers makes them superior or something, and that they shouldn't have to do something because they don't like it.
Some people want more special treatment, when I want the label Aspergers to be destroyed. Its just an excuse for special treatment, and I seriously dislike it.

I have no problems with my Aspergers, I have problems with the way they 'treat' it.



886
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04 Jun 2009, 10:00 pm

Ah just wait until they get into the real world. All I have to say.


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MattShizzle
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04 Jun 2009, 10:01 pm

Maybe your lucky enough that being able to do certain things isn't a serious problem to the point of being painful or even making you throw up?



millie
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04 Jun 2009, 10:17 pm

what i am learning here is everyone's experiences of autism are very different.



TheMidnightJudge
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04 Jun 2009, 10:44 pm

Yeah, finding excuses is a flaw of human nature in general. Using autism as an excuse is just convenient.


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sinsboldly
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04 Jun 2009, 10:47 pm

and every AS has their own way of dealing with it.


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Last edited by sinsboldly on 04 Jun 2009, 10:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

MattShizzle
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04 Jun 2009, 10:52 pm

This sort of thing makes me sick - it's almost like telling a depressed person to "just cheer up" or a paraplegic to "just get up and walk."



MysteryChild
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04 Jun 2009, 11:02 pm

MattShizzle wrote:
This sort of thing makes me sick - it's almost like telling a depressed person to "just cheer up" or a paraplegic to "just get up and walk."


That reminds me of my first roomie in college. when I was dxed with SAD and clinical depression, her 'expert' opinion was I should get out more and just "get over it". 14 years later and still makes me want to tear my hair out. :wall:


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pensieve
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04 Jun 2009, 11:22 pm

AlMightyAl wrote:
I'm getting tired of the threads titled "I don't like doing this!" and "I don't like doing that!".
Some people here seem to think having Aspergers makes them superior or something, and that they shouldn't have to do something because they don't like it.
Some people want more special treatment, when I want the label Aspergers to be destroyed. Its just an excuse for special treatment, and I seriously dislike it.

I have no problems with my Aspergers, I have problems with the way they 'treat' it.

You have mild Asperger's. Other people with more severe symptoms could really struggle with doing something. I struggle with a lot of things, though I still do them. There might be some things that I've had a bad experience with that I try to avoid doing them, or I have an overwhelming anxiety about it. Someone with anxiety can't just get over something. I seriously hate it when people think people should just deal with something. I also hate when people expect you to act a certain way just because that's how they would act, or it's the 'normal' way to act.
What I'm trying to say is: you don't know what people are feeling or what's going on in their head.


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Liresse
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04 Jun 2009, 11:27 pm

I think the people who are posting "I can't do this!" threads are people who are still in the early stages of post-diagnosis mentality. They're still trying to diagnose themselves and justify their diagnosis because they've just had a major identity shift and want to talk about it so it seems more like reality to them. I think they also tend to be young (eg under 20 years) and do not have "the real world" to contend with, so they are taking every opportunity to engage with their "diagnosis" that they can.

Let them be. It's an exciting new world for them.


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millie
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05 Jun 2009, 12:04 am

Quote:
pensieve wrote:
You have mild Asperger's. Other people with more severe symptoms could really struggle with doing something. I struggle with a lot of things, though I still do them. There might be some things that I've had a bad experience with that I try to avoid doing them, or I have an overwhelming anxiety about it. Someone with anxiety can't just get over something. I seriously hate it when people think people should just deal with something. I also hate when people expect you to act a certain way just because that's how they would act, or it's the 'normal' way to act.
What I'm trying to say is: you don't know what people are feeling or what's going on in their head.


i must agree with the lovely pensieve here.
I am struggling greatly with life at present. I am in a pit and feel like i cannot get out. Sometimes that is how it is for me.
we need to be tolerant here. some find things easy and others find things hard. Some days are good and some days are shocking.

Everyone does their best. it isn't always easy with ASD....



toasterboy
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05 Jun 2009, 12:15 am

Everyone has different abilities/support/limitations. Sometimes people do just whine when they can "just do it", while other people genuinely have limitations compared to other people in the same boat.

I have yet to experience any "special treatment" or witness anyone with autism receive such in the real world. I'm 32 years old, and have been on my own since 16. Regardless of the ADA, when it comes to having a life, working, being independent, people are pretty much on their own to sink or swim. Myself, I'm a lousy swimmer so I dog paddle.

The lucky ones in life have a supportive family and friends to help out. I have neither. :(



Liresse
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05 Jun 2009, 12:31 am

toasterboy wrote:
Everyone has different abilities/support/limitations. Sometimes people do just whine when they can "just do it", while other people genuinely have limitations compared to other people in the same boat.


qft.

It's premature to make assumptions really. The ones I made in the post above are specifically for the kinds of threads the OP perceives, that he/she thinks are not a big deal. But ideally we'd realise that if we want acceptance for our differences, we should have acceptance for others' differences too.


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05 Jun 2009, 1:04 am

Also, what one person may perceive as whining may in reality be a request for advice. For instance, there was recently a thread here about how the OP hated going grocery shopping. The thread was filled with a ton of advice from others about their personal coping strategies and what they think might work for the OP.

This is a support forum, after all. Let's be, well... supportive.


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05 Jun 2009, 2:41 am

If you are tired of something, that is ok, but certain things are a part of life and it won't go away... and if somehow that something is ever removed from your life then that would be wonderful! but the possibility remains that another issue will arise become your new pet peeve.

Ever since I came across this site, I have been reading about people who are dealing with many issues in life that have more than just a hint of similarity to my life experiences from my past all the way to the present; difficulty dealing with everyday people, learning challenges, anxieties, and just having a general feeling of being alone in the world, because of my different way of seeing things.

Almost every thread that I have read on wp leaves me saying wow! I go through that all the time and just didn't know what it was. Like many others here, I was taught as a child to act accordingly or "snap out of it", and I have never been dx'd so all through child hood I was thought to be "misbehaving" intentionally and got into alot of trouble for making mistakes that maybe could have been avoided if an adult in my family or in school would have gotten me help at an early age instead of trying solely to discipline the bad behavior out of me.

This is the advantage that some of the younger ones here have. If you are still in grade school and living with parents or guardians who have taken the time to notice your developmental differences from other children, and got you dx'd early (or at all) then maybe you were able to get proper support amd medication to help you deal and adapt to the now Known fact that you are a little different but still an intelligent being.

Some of us here got dx'd later in adulthood or still have yet to be and are just now figuring out why the simple things in life were so difficult for them. Some have lost jobs, their social life and have even been incarcerated because no one understood them early on.

If you are getting the people support, understanding and patience that you need to help you deal with everyday challenges that asd can present then please feel free to consider yourself blessed! This should not be taken for granted! Others here are still coping with asd symptoms and not dx'd but reading and getting involved with the forums on wp has been a huge relief and a beginning to getting their lives in order.

Lastly, I would like to say that I was not raised to receive or believe myself to be or have any type of disorder as long as I could get up and work, so just reading about asd in the past from different sources and now this site makes me a little anxious and feel like I am going against my upbringing, but I am not here to gain sympathy or any special treatment, this is simply a means to relate and share stories and experiences with others who have similar challenges in their lives and hopefully help one another cope.

I don't think we should be bashing one another or anyone else but there is a such thing here as freedom of speach and you are free to speak your mind as freely as you like but just remember how you feel when you are being roasted for your different way of seeing things.

Take care of yourselves, and each other.

Jery Springer :lol:

Just a little comic relief. :wink:


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mechanicalgirl39
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05 Jun 2009, 6:37 am

MattShizzle wrote:
Maybe your lucky enough that being able to do certain things isn't a serious problem to the point of being painful or even making you throw up?


Yupyup. Or making you constantly hyperventilate and sleep only 2-3 hours because you are so anxious and disrupted.


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