Advice Needed: Another Communication Issue

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pschristmas
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16 Jun 2009, 11:00 pm

Sorry to bug everyone with another one of these. I've been chewing on this one all evening and then saw Greentea's earlier post. You all did so well on that one, I thought I'd ask your advice with mine.

I found this guy on-line who does relationships seminars -- smallish groups, quiet locations, pretty scenery, and probably ludicrously expensive once I add it all up -- but they sound like a nice and possibly helpful weekend trip. I decided to email him and ask him whether he had experience with people with some form of HFA, since we all know the issues with relationship advice aimed entirely at NTs.

Now, part of this is my fault: I was unclear. I was trying for casual so I wouldn't sound stilted like I normally do when asking for information and, as usual, I screwed it up.

My question: "Do you ever have HFA folks attend your events?"
His answer: "Doing a relationship seminar in the mountains of Colorado the weekend of July 20th. In any case thanks for stopping by and I send you all the best."

The problem is obvious: he didn't answer the question. He gave me scheduling information followed by the standard polite: "Conversation over, don't bug me anymore."

My question now is, having gotten that, should I write back for clarification or just drop it? Do I assume he didn't understand the question -- I really should have stated what I needed more clearly -- or that he did understand the question and chose not to answer it? I don't want to be a bother or come across as a ditz, but I also don't want to spend money on something that won't be helpful to me.

Like I said, I've been chewing this over for the better part of the evening and can't come to a decision.

Regards,

Patricia



jennyishere
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16 Jun 2009, 11:13 pm

I suspect that message wasn't personally directed to you at all. It sounds rather like an automated response, the kind that you can set your email server to send automatically if you're going to be unable to answer your emails for a while. It's basically saying "Thanks for visiting my website, this is my next seminar."

Is that a possibility?



pschristmas
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16 Jun 2009, 11:16 pm

No, he responded very clearly to something else I had said in my email, so I know it wasn't a canned response.

Regards,

Patricia



Learning2Survive
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16 Jun 2009, 11:46 pm

Hi Patricia,

I'm sure he would take your money even if you told him you just broke out of jail and the cops are after you. There are tons of these relationship seminar things and trust me they will take anyone they can find. And women are always in high demand in these seminars. Just don't spend more than $300 on this thing.


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pschristmas
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16 Jun 2009, 11:49 pm

I'm not so much concerned about him accepting me as about me accepting him. :lol:

Regards,

Patricia



pandd
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17 Jun 2009, 12:33 am

You should most certainly ask again (if you used HFA be sure to spell the words out fully though).

If this person has the attitude and aptitude to make their seminar worthwhile for you personally, then certainly they will answer this question without resenting you and without thinking the worst of you. If they cannot, will not or wish not to answer your question, or think worse of you for having re-asked it, then I doubt they have the ability to deliver a seminar useful to you.



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17 Jun 2009, 3:51 am

Don't ding him too hard on that one. HFA can mean a million things (well, at least 35 anyway). I would have taken that to be referencing an organization. Rather than revealing that he doesn't know which group you meant, he may have just replied on the basis of "all organizations are welcome".

HFA Hyogo Framework for Action
HFA Harry Fox Agency, Inc.
HFA Harvard Film Archive (Harvard University)
HFA Housing Finance Agency (District of Columbia government)
HFA High-Functioning Autism
HFA Hospice Foundation of America
HFA Hedge Fund Association
HFA Healthy Families America
HFA Humane Farming Association
HFA Health Funding Authority (New Zealand)
HFA Hydrofluoroalkane-134a
HFA Henry Ford Academy (Dearborn, Michigan)
HFA Houston Football Association
HFA Hemifacial Atrophy, Progressive
HFA Human Factors Analysis
HFA High Frequency Active
HFA Hume-Fogg Academic (High School, Nashville TN)
HFA Hot Flow Anomaly
HFA Health Facility Administrator
HFA Harvard Factory Automation (Harvard, IL)
HFA Hitchcock Fleming and Associates (Akron, OH advertising agency)
HFA Heritage Flight Academy (Long Island, NY)
HFA High Frequency Array
HFA Heavy Field Artillery
HFA Handsfree Allowed (digital telephones)
HFA High Frequency Antenna
HFA Hot Fix Accumulator (software and security)
HFA Haifa, Israel - International Airport (Airport Code)
HFA Housing Finance Agency for CEE/SEE
HFA Hardened Flexible Array
HFA Hydrogen Fueled Aircraft
HFA Hard Fibres Association
HFA Heavy Freight Allowal
HFA Hispanic Franchisee Association
HFA High Frequency Average thresholds


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Tory_canuck
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17 Jun 2009, 3:58 am

pschristmas wrote:
No, he responded very clearly to something else I had said in my email, so I know it wasn't a canned response.

Regards,

Patricia



It could be a form response, or as us legal beagles call, a "precedent" which was tailored to your situation.It is semi-automated.I have done various letters for my classes in my paralegal class, which we tailored to each "legal scenario" that was thrown at us for assignments.


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millie
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17 Jun 2009, 4:36 am

ViperaAspis makes the point rather well. :lol:
You may want to clarify the term "HFA."



pschristmas
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17 Jun 2009, 12:08 pm

Thanks to everyone who responded. I did go ahead and write back for clarification. Hopefully, I'll know better whether I should try and sign up or not.

ViperaAspis and Millie: You're both right. I was being too unclear. I keep forgetting that most people are not immersed in autism and may not be familiar with the jargon involved.

Regards,

Patricia