So-Called "Non-Functional" Routines

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Ok, I´ve been posting a little less on Wrong Planet in the last few weeks. One reason is that my Mom is very ill, and this has caused a lot of stress in the family. I´m still in Europe, though I plan to go back to the US (where my family is) in about 1 week. In the meantime, there have often been quite difficult and intense e-mails and phone conversations with various family members.

I notice that right around the time that things got bad for my Mom, I felt a desire- or, maybe I should say a compulsion?- to extend my rituals and routines. This has sometimes been a bit time consuming, and I assume it has something to do with stress. I notice I often feel tired, almost like I can´t function anymore, but after doing some of my "non-functional routines"- (usually consisting of watching the same music videos I´ve already seen ad nauseum, and basically zoning out for a bit)- I start to feel better. In fact, I can feel the energy returning, and afterward, I can finally write that one last e-mail, or have that difficult conversation, or prepare what I need for work the next day. If anything, I think my routines are "functional" in that they seem to revitalize me and help me to focus, although, I bet to an outside person they look "non-functional".

Does anyone else notice something similar? Aren´t routines and rituals something like meditation, to an autistic person?

I think that's exactly the point.. that their function is to alleviate stress and help you feel better.. as opposed to routines that would have a function in and of themselves. If someone's "routine" is to get up, have coffee, check e-mail, take a shower, get in their car, go to work.. those are all things that serve their own purpose, so if they miss their coffee, they're a wreak because they're addicted to caffeine and haven't gotten their fix. Everybody has some kind of routines. The purpose of having the thing in the diagnostic criteria is to specify the types of routines that are specific to autistics.. otherwise everyone would meet that criterion. If the function of the routine is that you'll feel incredibly anxious if you don't, that's considered abnormal if it's not something that should cause anxiety. (Like, if someone feels anxiety because they didn't check on their child, that's normal, because children need to be checked on.. but if someone feels anxiety because they didn't touch the doorknob 150 times before leaving the house, that's abnormal, because you don't need to touch the doorknob 150 times.)

Interesting. I've never thought of myself as much of a non-functional routine person, because I always thought of that as being like Linda in "Snow Cake", checking her kitchen, which is more OCD than is typical for me.



But your examples make me realize that I'm doing this CONSTANTLY. These days they involve things like watching a particular short video (or playing it in my head), or standing in the hallway and having a specific "fantasy". No, fantasy is the wrong word, because that implies some kind of story, or something happening. This is just a mental image, with perhaps some word thoughts like, "There it is. There it is." There are a lot of other things like this that I do.

When I was in my 20's, I used to lie on my bed in my room and write "A: chest, triceps, shoulders" and "B: biceps, back, legs, abs" in a notebook, and draw little calendars with A on some days and B on others. I thought of it as planning my exercise routine, but I wrote this stuff ALL the time, and never adhered to that routine. I mean, sometimes I did and sometimes I didn't, but the act of writing it down had no function. I just had to write it, sometimes over and over. Or I'd write "1987, 1988, 1989, 1990.... 21, 22, 23, 24," over and over. I think this was based on some need to plan for the future, and not knowing how. Again, totally non-functional. And yet it never occurred to me that this was odd. (Is it? Maybe everyone does that. I doubt it, though, knowing what I know now.) I still do stuff like this all the time.

It's no wonder I've never gotten anything accomplished in my life!

Morgana, I'm sorry to hear about your mother and the stresses in your life.

I never thought of it that way, but I'd always love getting all my school supplies and organizing them and everything.. but I'd never actually stay organized. It was just when I first got the stuff, and I'd swear I was going to stay organized, but of course, I was always a total mess. It was neat for the first day, though!

I think this is true for everyone to some degree. NT's have thier own routines and they aren't always purely functional. Routines and rituals aren't at all abnormal. It's more a matter of degree than functionality. NT's have thier routine activities that they derive comfort from, they're just more flexible and usually have a larger variety of "comfort routines".

They are very much meditative in my experience. Watching the music video you've already seen a thousand times is like watching the watch swing back and forth. The looping of the same sensory stimuli relaxes the mind because it stops having to process it, it keeps checking for changes in sensory impulses so that it can update your consciousness on the changes, and it keeps going No change, No change, No change... stops bothering to tell it no change so often... no change....... no change...................no change............................................. no change........................................................................................ no change.........................................purple penguin......................no change.................................... no change.................................................................... no change..................................... purple penguin on a blue hippo................................................. .....................no change...................................................................................... no change...................................................... purple penguin on a blue hippo who's surfing the pacific, look out sailboat comiCHANGE somebody entered the room, oh what do you need? I'm feeling so energized and in control hehehe purple penguin... where did that come from?

Or is that just me? hehehe, purple penguin on a blue hippo, look out sailboat we're coming to get you.