How do you feel about being on the spectrum?

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criss
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13 Jul 2009, 2:55 am

I am interested in asking you all this question. As often many of us aspies here talk about their Autism as a 'disorder' or their 'condition' and at times referring to themselves as being brain damaged or in some way WRONG.

This way of relating to oneself seems so contrary to the empowered and politicized anti-cure movement within our culture, so I was curious, if despite the FEELING that many of us aspies have, of being on the 'Wrong Planet' how many of us really believe we are damaged, or that we are just as gifted and imperfect as any NT?

Chris


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Greentea
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13 Jul 2009, 2:59 am

I believe we're limited in some things and compensate with some wonderful, unusual skills. The fact that for NTs our wonderful skills are usually no compensation further limits us.


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Acacia
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13 Jul 2009, 3:04 am

Totally my opinion here. To each their own...

I have Asperger's Syndrome.
AS is not a gift, or a talent, or a "difference".
It's a disability that prevents me from living a complete and fulfilling life.
AS has alienated me from my relatives and peers, caused me to lose jobs, destroyed relationships, ruined friendships, and made me an anxious, tired wreck.

I accept who I am, but I believe that I am missing out on a good part of life because of my condition. I'm glad that I know, but I am not happy about being "on the spectrum."


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Crassus
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13 Jul 2009, 3:11 am

I feel about with my hands and mind, how does anybody else feel about?


I'm both being silly and sincere at the same time. Life is Death. Humanity is Inhumane. Up is down. Things are defined by that which they are not, who cares about labels except when they are caring about labels. When I'm talking about psychoanalysis as it pertains to my existence relative to others, I understand the common semantics of a system that uses the words disorder and condition in a specific context. When I'm talking about who I am as a person and the respect and love I have for myself, those same things are simply who I am.

What words mean is only important when what they mean is important. If some random person wants to mock my autism, the meaning of the words is unimportant. When somebody wants to discuss the details of neurological basis of autism, it is important we are using words to mean the same things. When somebody wants to explain "this totally awesome thing I just saw happen" the broad sketch that conveys the experience is important and interrupting for clarifications will only ruin the narrative attempting to convey an emotional experience to you.



bdhkhsfgk
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13 Jul 2009, 3:16 am

To me, having AS is a heavenly gift that i have difficulties believing how lucky i am to life a different life :) :wink:



Meta
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13 Jul 2009, 3:37 am

ambivalent



whitetiger
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13 Jul 2009, 4:25 am

Well, I have suffered tremendously through AS throughout my life. I'd never wish it on any child, and hence I do not want children.

Still, I am glad I have AS as an adult, because I can finally make friends who are like me. I can finally get the support services I need, too.


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OddFinn
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13 Jul 2009, 6:14 am

I feel confused whenever someone asks me how I feel. :?


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fiddlerpianist
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13 Jul 2009, 6:30 am

I feel refracted.


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13 Jul 2009, 6:56 am

Greentea wrote:
I believe we're limited in some things and compensate with some wonderful, unusual skills. The fact that for NTs our wonderful skills are usually no compensation further limits us.


Hence the need for the Social Model of Disability



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13 Jul 2009, 7:01 am

Acacia wrote:
Totally my opinion here. To each their own...

I have Asperger's Syndrome.
AS is not a gift, or a talent, or a "difference".
It's a disability that prevents me from living a complete and fulfilling life.
AS has alienated me from my relatives and peers, caused me to lose jobs, destroyed relationships, ruined friendships, and made me an anxious, tired wreck.

I accept who I am, but I believe that I am missing out on a good part of life because of my condition. I'm glad that I know, but I am not happy about being "on the spectrum."


I would say that it is other people's attitudes to the symptoms of AS (whether or not they know about the condition) which has caused those bad things to happen, rather than the AS itself. I say that as an example of a view from the Social Model of Disability, which is more in our favour than the Medical Model of Disability.



Henriksson
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13 Jul 2009, 7:14 am

I has shaped who I am. It is part of my identity. To erase that would be to kill me and put someone else in my place.


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wildgrape
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13 Jul 2009, 7:15 am

I consider myself "just as gifted and imperfect as any NT", and I am definitely not brain-damaged; just the opposite, in fact.

Over-all, my autism has been a wonderful gift, and has directly led to many achievements. Although I am now by choice completely cut off from society, I feel that I live a beautiful life.



CockneyRebel
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13 Jul 2009, 7:17 am

I see it just as a different way of being, and there's nothing wrong with being different.


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zer0netgain
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13 Jul 2009, 7:33 am

Acacia wrote:
Totally my opinion here. To each their own...

I have Asperger's Syndrome.
AS is not a gift, or a talent, or a "difference".
It's a disability that prevents me from living a complete and fulfilling life.
AS has alienated me from my relatives and peers, caused me to lose jobs, destroyed relationships, ruined friendships, and made me an anxious, tired wreck.

I accept who I am, but I believe that I am missing out on a good part of life because of my condition. I'm glad that I know, but I am not happy about being "on the spectrum."


+1

That's my take too.

If people with AS were early-diagnosed, helped to overcome the "negative" traits of AS and encouraged to contribute to society using the "gifts" that AS sometimes offers, I think it would help make every person with AS as productive, self-reliant and "happy" or "fulfilled" as possible.

However, AS has taken much from me. I know "normal" is just a setting on the clothes dryer, but my inability to fit in with mainstream society has held me back from being as prosperous or self-sufficient as I desire, and I feel that's having something taken from me that I see others able to accomplish with relative ease.

That I have learned to accept and make peace with my condition and make the most of what I have doesn't mean it's what I would have chosen for myself.



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13 Jul 2009, 7:48 am

When I first started reading books and Internet accounts of AS last year, I started to develop an analogy of modification. Think of chopper bikes, tweaked software, modified craft tools etc. Those are all to do with individuality and specialization, whether in function or appearance. More recently, since reading about the greater white matter connectivity in the NT brain, my idea has evolved further; it seems that everybody probably has fundamentally diverse multiple intelligence profiles but that the moderating, unifying, co-ordinating effect of this greater connectivity comes at the price of "dampening" some of the individuality and specialization. In turn, the internal conformity of the elements of the NT brain is reflected within predominantly NT society, which despises eccentricity, individuality, transability and original thinking, including much of what emanates from the autistic spectrum.