Do you think we have to many things to change?

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Being an Aspie is hard since it's not just 1 issue it's many traits and also each person has different traits of being an Aspie. SO I was curious what issues you have that people say to "change"

1) Seeing emotion's differently (Laughing when my sisters get into trouble I get told "you need to learn to change")

2) clumsy (learn to pick up your feet) (I tend to trip over my own feet my family busted a gut laughing in Target doing this the other day LOL!)

3) social skills issues (huge range one that happen today is interrupting family when they are speaking)

4) special interests (Go get a social life/Don't you have anything else better to talk about?)

5) Forgot Stimming (I move my rings on my fingers ALOT My sister mention I should be put on some pill for it.)

So what has your family said to "change"?

I think you have to prioritize what you want to change.
If something does no harm, why change it? You said you move your rings around on your fingers. Big frickin' whoop. Unless you're getting sores on your fingers from it, if it's not interfering with your life in a major way, it'd be absolutely stupid to take drugs that may or may not work and would probably cause side effects just to stop doing it.
Other things you can change by changing your surroundings. Find people who like to hear about your special interests. Find people who say what they mean and mean what they say and don't dance around whatever they're trying to say or twist your words, who will TELL you what they feel instead of expecting you to flippin' guess at it and getting pissed when you guess wrong. Find people you can hang out with without talking. (seriously, a friendship or relationship like that is the best thing in the world. You can do your own thing, but you're not alone.)
That way there's fewer things you actually have to work on changing about yourself. Some things you do need to work on changing, just strip away the things that don't need to be changed.

Do you want to change these things?

The only thing that I think is important to work on is social skills and if I understand correctly, mostly everyone needs to work on them a little (even NT's sometimes). There's no problem with special interests, the thing to think about is not to talk to much about them and to try to talk about them with a person who is interested in them.

About stimming, it's commonly a thing that is done to calm oneself, much better to stim than have meds. Oh, and if your rings are giving your fingers sores, I've seen rings that have an outside bit that moves and the inside bit stays put. I have no idea what they are called though.

About your sisters, I'd say to try not to laugh at them when they get into trouble (and they can see and hear you), let yourself laugh as much as you want when you're alone (where no one can hear you). If you're at a computer, you could switch on a jokes page and then laugh too, pretending that it's the jokes page that made you laugh.

1. My meltdowns. I do agree to that one, but I don't think that just telling me to stop behaving like that works, since what else to do when I'm badly overloaded?
2. My stims, mostly hair twirling. My family says it's extrmeely distracting and my diangosing psychologist says it's a serious social handicap, but my boyfriend and all othe rpeople I mostly hang out with don't conside rit a problem.
3. My bluntness. Mom says I am "arguing", when I'm really not, but she can hersle fbe quite argumentative, so I don't care what she thinks.
4. Be less egocentrical, my Mom says. I have no clue how to do that.
5. Obessions: my parents don't like that I am into autism issues and tell me to stop obsessing over "myself", despite the fact that most of what I read about autism etc. has little to do with myself personally.

With me it's the personal management mainly... maintaining clean house, paying bills on time. The things that interfere with that is really a combo of things like Aspergers, PTSD, chronic fatigue. i don't live with my mom and sister anymore, so i suppose that's all they can complain about. My husband has no compaints he will make publically to me, though I'm positive he has some he wisely keeps to himself .

Just remember: if you're going to change, do it for you...not for them

There's nothing about myself that I wish to change.

When at home my family ask me to come down to dinner and talk, what about lol they do not know me and they years of abuse mental abuse that mounted just have me incredibly resentful towards my mother I am very cold, blunt but around my friens I am completely a different person its just that I hate the idea of famil because it is conditioning on an emotional level and I am not like that

My parents decided one summer when I was a preteen, that they will not have a daughter with an English accent blemish their perfectly Canadian family. Every time that I tried to say a sentence, both parents kept on saying, "Don't talk through your nose! You're talking through your nose, again! None of the kids around here speak the way that you do! I said, don't talk through your nose! You can still say whatever it is that you want to say...just don't talk through your nose! What's your problem? You sound like you're from London...don't talk through your nose!" It got to the point, that I wouldn't watch a TV show, unless it had a British actor on it. I've spent that whole summer watching Mr. Belvedere and The Monkees. That's also when I've started retreating into my own little world, which was the London of that time, with Routemasters and black taxis. I've asked my sister one night, that summer if I spoke through my nose. She told me that I did, sometimes. I've told my sister, who happened to be as shallow as my parents, that I wouldn't be around, much longer. I'd either be dead, or living in the streets of London, England. My knowledgeable family doctor told my unknowing father, that I'm meant to have a Cockney accent, because of the way that my nasal passages are formed, that November. That it wasn't a personal choice, at that time, for someone who presumed that it was. I've come to hate North American TV and North American accents, to the point that it did become my personal choice to keep my accent. Perhaps, not the results that my family was expecting.