Remedial tact and diplomacy course...

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If you could attend one, what would it cover?

Would it be a course with other people there, or would it be a book or an internet thing?

Are their topics other than tact and diplomacy that you would want to study?

And what would you call it? (I dislike the term "social skills", hate picking up books with that on the cover).

Are there any in existence that are any good?

I don't know if there are any applicable ones out there. I've been advised to attend one, but the ones run by the training companies my employer uses are inappropriate (or so I've been advised).

I'm going to have a chat with the National Autistic Society and see if they can help me find one.

What would be in there? I don't know. Better people skills for work... management stuff, mostly. I did a two-day course on that stuff previously and it was damned near useless to me because it wasn't geared to my needs.

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie.

I read it many years ago, and should probably read it again. If you click on the title, it'll take you to the Amazon site where it's sold. I made it a link because if you scroll down and look at some of the reviews, some of them give a pretty good idea of the fundamentals that are in the book. It's pretty good stuff.

As someone said in one of the reviews, it's a classic for a reason.

Elderwanda, I do like How to Win Friends and Influence People, I have read it over and over again in the last twenty years. I do love the anecdote about the man who got up one morning and smiled at his wife and said "good morning". The wife was shocked and bewildered, and he told her that in future she could expect that as an everday occurrence.

What I had in mind was something for those of us who understand the theory but find it hard to apply. Reading through old threads I can see that some WPers do feel like that about it. I myself have had some disappointing experiences with smiles, for instance. Apparently my smiles can look quite threatening.

C-57D, what sort of people skills for work? Are you talking about things like generic stuff on how you tell someone during an appraisal that they need to plan their project cashflow better, or are you thinking of more specific stuff about your own body language and tone of voice? When I asked the NAS they didn't come up with anything but ask them again see if you get a different answer!

I definately know the meaning of "wrong" looking smiles:D Which is exactly why I wouldn't bother with Dale Carnegie books and stuff like that. Which I have partly read btw. The theory is not really all that complicated, but these classes are meant for ppl that probably have the opposite problem to aspies- ppl who know how to come across a certain way but need to learn more about the psychology part of it. Without the right performance skills these kind of classes and books would be useless, just like a book on martial arts is useless for a person without limbs. Maybe there are some classes on how to use your facial muscles more correctly or just somewhere where you can practice smiling until someone tells you you're doing it right:D I haven't heard of them but it'd be cool.

Okay, so the topic list I've got so far is:

Rehearsing body language and facial expressions.
Rehearsing what could be called common talking as well as public speaking.

Conversation practise - body language, facial expression, and following what is going on in the following set-ups:
One-to-one conversations
One-to-two conversations
Conversations with more than three people

I'm thinking general line-management skills - appraisals, coaching, resolving problems, the sort of stuff people do when they have staff. And that's both methodology and things like tone, language and posture. I think there's also an argument for being taught the basics of giving clear, precise, persuasive talks for when you've got to convince someone higher up of an option.

Oh, and networking. Pain in the backside, but apparently you can't get anywhere without it.