Social executive dysfunction

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I was just thinking about something. It seems there's a lot of aspies here who can't function socially because they bother/offend people. I don't seem to have that problem.

People usually seem to like me even though I'm quiet. It's just that the conversation is always one sided. People ask me all kinds of questions and I go on about myself, yet I have to try really hard to remember to ask questions myself. I don't naturally do it and the end result is that people know more about me than I know about them. Then because I know nothing I never know how to restart a conversation with someone I've met before. I also never remember to take down people's numbers or make a concerted effort to remember people's names.

Then it never occurs to me in the moment that I should call a friend just to chat. I have super low motivation when it comes to using the telephone so if I don't have a lifestyle where I can be in contact with friends every day they just disappear. I'm terrible when it comes to responding to emails as well. It seems like it takes me 100 times more effort to write an email to a friend than it does for a normal person.

Anyways, I feel like the reasons I get so isolated have to do with these types of issues. Can anyone here relate?

I can relate to all of that. I have poor executive function in most areas of life, including social.

For sure. I'm terrible at keeping friendships from fading away. When the activity that brought us together stops, almost always, so does the friendship. Doing activities together is so easy. But calling someone without a good reason, much harder.

Think I have a hard time dealing w/ emotions. A sense of purpose is a good away to divert attention away from them.

totally relate to you. but it doesn't bother me at all. honestly i do not know how people manage to get something accomplished with all that chit-chat with ten zillion friends. boring to death. that is mental death.

Yes, I absolutely can relate.

I'm generally well liked, too, and my conversations have a tendency to be one-sided. I've gotten better about remembering to ask leading questions such as, "And how are your kids doing?" even though many times I don't really care; I just know it's what I'm supposed to ask. With people I don't know very well (even some ones that I do know very well), I would be very uncomfortable with if it were just me and the other person in the room. Others I can have a great one-on-one with, no problems at all.

Names with faces... yeah, I don't usually remember, though if I actually say the person's name out loud, I have a better chance of remembering it.

Friendships fading away... oh yeah. If someone isn't a part of my daily life and routine, I rarely think about them unless something I'm thinking about reminds me of them. My old college friends I rarely talk to, and if I do end up swinging by their house on my way somewhere, I'm inevitably making a last-minute phone call asking if I can stop by.

Non-immediate family, too. I rarely think about my mother or brother, so I don't remember to call on any kind of regular basis.

Social focus topic

People like talking to me when they have a problem or want to discuss a specific issue. yesterday a neighbour and I were discussing fleas and lice, and how to cope with these pests. i had to have my house fumigated for fleas, and she had a flea problem last year.

my conversations are kind of one-sided for the other person. they'll ask me questions and I'll not respond or not talk much and I don't think to elaborate or talk to them at all.

I think it is from only being focused on one thing at a time, so forgetting to email people etc can happen. definitely executive dysfunction. Also it sounds like you have a dislike of emailing. I tend to forget to do things that I dont find interesting to do.