Preparing an aspie for car accidents and police pullovers

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So I've been driving for over a year now and I'm been waaaaaaay too lucky on the road as far as not having any accidents of the kind or being pulled over by a cop due to making lousy turns, speeds and stops. But I still fear this is gonna happen eventually given my weak ability to pay attention. Plus I'm a very nervous wreck with socializing. So I am sure to have an emotional breakdown if I'm pulled over by a cop or have to face hitting someone's car.

I think we could use some advice as to how to deal with the worse, for me anyway. My friend told me that in a car accident situation you shouldn't say it's your fault cause of some sort of insurance liability thing. Oh well.

So what should I do should that fateful doomsday should come when I finally do get pulled over or hit someone with my car...like I almost did today.

when police comes just keep claiming it was not our fault most off people do that anyway ....also dont worry about almost hitting someone because i have to drive every morning at tired and been close to many crashes because of it ,its just someting u cant avoid....just do your best soldier i can tell thousands off drivers who make dangerous mistakes every day ( one even stopped at fast lane )

I don't trust myself to drive. I don't think I'll ever learn, unless there's some serious turnaround concerning my personality, my issues, my skills, my nerves, and my potential.

I don't blame you. I've only had one speeding ticket in my life because I'm afraid of being pulled over. I drive under the speed limit most of the time. I generally don't like cops. I don't like their attitude.

Keep your hands where they can see them, and answer only direct questions, with yes/no if possible. The less you say, the better.

It is a lot like being a young black male pulled over by the police, I think; they are more likely to assume you have bad intentions than they would assume it of most people because of your odd body language. A friend of mine says he often gets pulled over for being drunk when he is not, in fact, drunk, and has never been on the road after even one drink. In the cops' defense, he is all too fond of speeding... They will pull him over for speeding and then assume he is drunk because of the way he acts. He is dyspraxic like me.

I was pulled over by a cop for using the wrong turn lane at an intersection. My main problem was that I could not understand what he was saying, and caught only about every fifth word through the traffic noise. Those of you with auditory processing issues might want to take that into account. I was also confused enough not to pay attention to making my speech come out right, and ended up talking so quietly he had to tell me to speak up.

Carry an "Autism Card" to explain.

Example:
"I have an Autism Spectrum Disorder. Under extreme stress, I may become unable to speak well, cry, or withdraw. Give me some space; these will resolve on their own. I do not need you to do anything. I may also have odd speech or body language, have trouble handling a conversation, or need more time to understand and follow directions. I live at (address) and in case of emergency you may contact (contact person)."

1)Join AAA. That has nothing to do with the police or what to do in the event of a collision with another car, but they will save your behind when your car breaks down. And it will at some point.

2)AAA sells a DVD called "Crash Course" which is an instructional DVD that walks you through what to do if you are ever in a collision with another car. You might be able to get it through their website even if you don't join.

3)You will be a nervous wreck if you ever get pulled over. It is utterly nerve wracking for everyone. For Aspies I assume that it would be extra traumatic and you may freeze up or have some other reaction that a cop won't look kindly on. I recommend that you rehearse what to do in the event of being pulled over. Have your friend play the cop- or another friend who has a fairly good idea of what the cop would realistically say. Sit in the front seat of your car when you do this. Don't do it in the living room sitting on your couch. You need to practice reaching into your wallet for your license and into your glove compartment for the registration when you are told "license and registration" by the cop, so you don't go all wonky and freeze up.

...

When an officer pull you over, they will ask you for your driver's lisence or registration or insurance. I just pull everything out of the glove box and give it to the officer and he looks through it and hands the rest back to you and keeps the ones he needs. Then you have to sit and wait while the officer is in the car filing a report or checking your driving history and then he comes back with the ticket (you be lucky if all he does is give you a warning) and he might ask you stupid questions like you name, date of birth, your weight and height and he does this only to verify it's your lisence because you could have a sibling who looks almost like you and it could be his or her lisence you are using. Or you could have a twin and it can be his or her lisence you are using.

So when you get pulled over, don't run away, do everything the officer tells you to do. If you don't cooperate, it just makes him think you did something wrong and you are hiding something and he can get aggressive with you because that is soemthing that guilty people would do, honest people stay and cooperate and answer questions because they want to get out of there and get it over with. I would also try and stay calm, if you freak out or have panic attacks, the officer could think you are trying to hide something and get more suspicious of you. People who are guilty of something, they can panic or freak out because they are horrible liars and the officer is trapping them with their questions. I can imagine this can be very bad for people with social anxiety or people who are afraid of officers or have an autism spectrum disorder or have some other language processing disorder or auditory. This can also be very bad for people who have dyspraxia because what if the officer asks the person to step out of the car and walk in a straight line, he could assume the person was drinking even though he doesn't smell like beer and doesn't have any opened bottles in his car. I think it's so important to just tell them what problem you have so they don't misread you when you are nervous or have poor balance or have troubles answering questions, etc.


PS your insurance still goes up when you have been in an accident, even if you weren't at fault.

Oh yeah when people get pulled over, sometimes they come up with excuses trying to get their way out of getting a ticket. Like they can say they have a sick friend in a hospital or they are late to an appointment and have to get there, their child had an accident so they are on their way and if they are lucky, the officer can just let them go telling them to drive carefully not even knowing the person was fibbing. I bet people also give officers guilt trips like "Oh no I can't afford to pay a big ticket or I won't be able to pay my rent."

Also some people plead not guilty to a ticket they got even though they are guilty just so they would pay less money.

But I bet there are lot of officers out there who won't take chances and give you a ticket nonetheless because I am sure they always are given excuses by drivers about why they were speeding or why they ran a stop sign, etc. or given guilt trips like "What about my children, how am I going to pay for food if I have a ticket to pay?"
Well here is a solution, don't break any rules on the road and you will be just fine. If you can't afford to get a ticket, follow the rules. I am also aware of people can get pulled over because they missed a stop sign or they accidently ran through a red light or they didn't know the speed limit or knew how fast they were going. I am sure that's when people do guilt trips or they are just honest and tell the officer they didn't know how fast they were going or didn't see the sign hoping the officer will just let them go with a warning.

Anyway I wouldn't worry about getting in a car wreck, I would just watch the road, never look for something as you are driving, don't text message while driving, don't change a CD as you are driving or look for a CD to listen to, always keep your eyes on the road, do no look at the scenery around you and just follow the rules and keep you eyes out for speed limit signs, stop signs, and pay attention to the stop lights as you are driving up to them.

I have done a few driving errors and be lucky there was no officer. If I drove through a stop sign and didn't even see it because a tree was covering it or a car and by the time I saw it, it was too late to stop, I would wait till the court date and tell the judge about that and plead not guilty because I would think it be a unfair ticket I got. If I full well knew there was a stop sign there, I would still stop even if a car is covering it.

Honestly, being a girl helps. When "emotional breakdown" consists of hysterical tears, you're less likely to be in deep crap. When I got into an accident, I was crying my eyes (and contacts..) out, and the cop was mostly just trying to calm me the heck down.
It may depend somewhat on whether you're a careful driver or not? I couldn't imagine trying to explain to a cop how I got into an accident if I caused it by doing something illegal, but explaining that I was looking for street signs because I wasn't sure where I was going and it was raining wasn't difficult because it was completely true.

One thing I think helps deal with authority figures in a helpful way is to ask them for advice. That only really works if there's something that you're confused about... But like if they tell you that you did something wrong and you're not sure what you should have done, or thought it would have been dangerous to do that because there was a car coming or something, it's usually a good idea to ask them. People tend to get into jobs like that 'cause they like telling people what to do, so if you ask them to tell you what to do, they're likely to take it fairly well.

Stay calm, say as little as possible, and be prepared with license, registration, and proof of insurance.

Even if you obey all the rules of the road, you'll probably be in a collision sooner or later. It's very frustrating, upsetting, and nerve-wracking, but the police just follow their protocols and do their job. Cooperate quietly and let your insurance handle towing your vehicle if that's necessary.

I don't like to drive, and rarely do so. I've spent most of my adult life without a car, and though I have one now, I manage to drive about 100 miles a month at most. My car and its mileage are something of a minor legend at the dealership where I get its oil change and maintenance done.

Note that some states have a "no fault" rule for car collision (Washington state, for instance). If you didn't cause the car collision, your insurance rates will not be affected.

Note too that I refuse to use the phrase "car accident", since virtually all collisions are the result of driver error.

I've never been in an accident, or gotten a ticket (touch wood) but I have been pulled over many times.

In an accident, you don't need to say much at all. You exchange insurance information, and answer police questions. The other driver may want to talk, or yell. Sh*t happens, don't get defensive or even talk if you don't feel like it.

The card is a good idea cuz we can look shifty or on drugs. And may have a shut-down or brown-out.

With the police, stop and put your hands on the top of the steering wheel. Wait until they are next to the car and can see in. Then roll down the window. Do not rummage in the glove box before the officer asks you for the registration. They don't have anywhere else they need to be. Take your time. Be polite and respectful, and answer the questions directly and truthfully. They don't want to pick on you.

One time I was pulled over by 3 cop cars with sirens blaring. I was all punked out and was with a bunch of my freaky friends. The cops had shotguns and drawn guns and we were freakin' scared. But we kept cool and just did what they asked. They did a quick check for weapons, and then said we could go. A car like ours had just been involved in a shooting, but we didn't fit the description of the shooters. They have a tough job to do.

Being on the more severe end of the spectrum, I always carry a medical id card and wear a medical alert emblem. My drivers license record has medic alert information on it. I also have a windshield sticker with a medical alert emblem on it. I think this has saved my life on at least 2 occasions. Cops are trained to suspect everyone as criminals, and anything out of the ordinary is suspicious to them.

Like another poster on this thread, I also think that many (not all) cops are bullies. Every bully at my school who didn't end up in trouble with the cops ended up becoming one. Then again, I have met some pretty nice cops as well. I don't like advertising being autistic, but I figure that is better than being tazed, beaten, or even worse, shot. At best wearing medical alert information will give cops the opportunity to understabd and properly assess your situation, at worse, it will put you in a much better legal situation should the event turn into a crisis.

Well, in my time I have had a lot of tickets and a few accidents, so hopefully what I write might be useful to someone somewhere.

The main thing when pulled over is to stay calm, if you do any form of relaxation exercises this is usually a good time to put them into practice. Be corteous, good morning/afternoon/evening officer. A bad attitude won't get you far either, just means the cop is going to have it in for you. If you are just getting pulled over at random for a license check or for a random breath test then go along with it, if you have done nothing wrong, if all your paperwork/licenses are in order, if you are not under the influence of alcohol or drugs, then nothing to worry about, just be polite and smile and say thank you officer. If your car is modified, make sure all the modifications are legal as this is an area that has been severely clamped down in recent years due to street racing. This is where attitude comes back into it, as a bad attitude means that police will be looking that much harder for things to pin on you, and illegal modifications or unsafe things on vehicles such as bald tires and lights not working or cracked windscreens and frayed seatbelts will be picked up on. Your car should be safe anyway, but if you have a limited income or don't drive a lot or are not organised then yes it is easy to miss some of this sort of thing, especially if you are not a mechanically inclined person.

The making sure your car is safe comes back into account when dealing with accidents too. Make sure your car is as safe as it can be by making sure your tyres and brakes and suspension and steering are operating properly. If you can afford the insurance, then you should definitely have it. And check that your policy will cover you if your car is damaged by uninsured drivers or hit and runs and all that sort of thing.


john