Who notices you're different?

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I ask because in spite of all my lifelong efforts, there's no way I can pass for "normal". However, I see some people here mention that it's all a question of learning. If they're right, then I'm a bad learner, I guess.

I'm capable of passing myself off as "normal" for a short period of time, ie. a job interview. or a short conversation with someone I've only just met. Beyond that I could never manage it. Sometimes you can actually see the penny-dropping moment, which i find either upsetting or funny depending on what mood I'm in.

Ditto, Pavel.

Everyone, sooner or later.

I can pass off as normal until someone has to be around me a lot or gets to know me.

I really have no idea if anyone sees me as different. They sure haven't confronted me if they did.

The average person in the grocery store could probably tell that I'm not overly concerned with fashion but I don't think there's anything about my appearance or manner that would draw attention. People I don't know well wonder why I don't engage in conversation easily, people I know very well think I'm flaky and wonder why I can't just stfu.

Most people can tell I'm not normal. I think it's because I have a habit of staring into space when I have nothing else to do.

Everyone notice I am different right away, if I walk passed them and they are complete strangers. If I look in the mirror it is very obvious I am different. I don't have to DO anything wrong just the way I look like is very different. I don't konw what to point to though. Logic says that if it is not about behavior, it has to be with something physical, like having my face deformed. But it isn't -- I can't think of a single physical parameter about me that is different. Yet, if you take photo of me it looks quite a bit different.

Roman, maybe it's the body language?

Well, truth is I don't know how others see me. They just ignore me as far as I can tell.

People think I'm normal until I talk to them. Then they usually realise there is at least something different about me. Usually that I'm quiet or mildly eccentric, but it takes about five minutes of conversation before people realise I'm really struggling. Since I never usually let it get to five minutes...

I have no idea how I would find out. As a rule people generally don't come up to others and tell them they think they're weird - unless they want to get punched in the glasses.

Most people, it doesn't take them long to realise I'm different after a short conversation.

Everyone else apart from very close friends and family.

My hypothesis:
People with similar non-verbal dialects and interests to my own tend to approach me first.
These people feel comfortable with me and I with them because we have similar behaviours and non-verbal dialects.

When you're surrounded by people who act and behave like you do, no-one really notices the difference. It's if you're surrounded by people who don't behave like you and expect you to be social all the time that the problems and personality clashes start to occur.


Very close friends and family have always claimed that there was nothing wrong with me and that I was fine just the way I was.

Everyone else was either in awe or extremely irritated by me.
Everyone else commented on my 'odd' beliefs or 'poor' coordination.
There was no 'happy medium'.

Pretty much everyone once they know me.

Everyone, except perhaps people I pass in the stores who aren't paying attention and don't care. Even then, if I stop in one place for long, the stimming will give me away (and the riding on the back of shopping carts, or leading them around by their sides instead of the push-handle at the back).

I can get through a 20 minute job interview ok, but that's ACTING!

My vocabulary sets me apart in casual conversation, behaviors in close proximity. Attitudes, ideas and habits after repeated exposure. And then there are the shirts that say things like "Do I LOOK like a @#&! People Person!?" and "DEaD GiRls DoN't SaY NO". What the hell, if you can't hide it, flaunt it.



They bully you less if they think your weirdness doesn't bother you.