Page 1 of 1 [ 16 posts ] 

Kitty4670
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,506
Location: California,USA

29 Jan 2017, 11:27 pm

It is very confusing, most of the time I can feel & act very very immature, I can feel like I'm an immature teenager, other times I can feel & act like an adult, but an adult in her late 20s. I think I can not feel like an adult too much, cuz it's too much pressure & my Asperger make me feel that way. It is like I'm two different people in one.



foxant
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 131
Location: Brazil

30 Jan 2017, 1:00 am

i kinda understand what are you talking about. It's an emotional thing. many aspergher has some low emotional quotient so its kinda normal feel that way even if you are already an adult. for me, i guess even if i had all knowledge of the world, i would not feel like a fully adult. im almost 30 and i didnt had much emotional evolution since i was 13. society had a huge problem with adults who dont act like adults, i wish you the best to withstand this pressure.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 55 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

Special Interest: memes


FandomConnection
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jun 2016
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 608

30 Jan 2017, 3:23 am

I mostly feel about 12 socially (or younger). I have trouble ordering for myself at restaurants etc. and have never had any inclination to pursue a romantic relationship (I don't understand how they work, anyway). I am also very intellectually advanced for my age (not to brag, I need to state that for my point), which is also confusing. When I was 8 I had the English reading comprehension of the average 18-year-old, and I have always been bored by the level of schoolwork (in all subjects). It's difficult when some people (classmates, teachers etc.) treat me sort of like an adult because of my academic capabilities, and my ability to make sensible and balanced decisions, but also treat me as very naive and sweet.

It is worth mentioning that I do not consider myself to have a family. I physically have parents, and a sibling, but they have never wanted a child who is not 'normal', and have constantly punished/berated me for being how I am. My parents are also manipulative, have caused me emotional and social damage, and do not support me emotionally. I don't feel that I have had a stable enough emotional upbringing to mature normally, so this may be the cause.


_________________
Diagnosed: Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1 without accompanying language impairment
I find it easiest to connect with people through the medium of fandoms, and enjoy the feeling of solidarity.
Too often, people say things they don't mean, and mean things they don't say.


PIgeek
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 11 Dec 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 103

30 Jan 2017, 1:19 pm

feel very adult (and people think i am) when i talk and debate about human right, '60 music, legalization of weed&co. and my atheist vison of the world. but i think at least i am just a immature and childish 15 years old that use politic and controversial topics to get fun


_________________
"Go ask Alice, i think she'll know
when logic, and proportion
have fallen sloppy dead
and the white knight is talking backwards
and the red queen is off with her head
remember what the dormouse said
feed your head, feed your head"

White rabbit -
Jefferson Airplane


TuesdaysChild
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jan 2017
Age: 43
Gender: Female
Posts: 44

30 Jan 2017, 1:33 pm

FandomConnection wrote:
I am also very intellectually advanced for my age (not to brag, I need to state that for my point), which is also confusing. When I was 8 I had the English reading comprehension of the average 18-year-old, and I have always been bored by the level of schoolwork (in all subjects). It's difficult when some people (classmates, teachers etc.) treat me sort of like an adult because of my academic capabilities, and my ability to make sensible and balanced decisions, but also treat me as very naive and sweet.


This sounds very, very much like my own childhood, intellectual precociousness contrasted with immature/situationally inappropriate social skills. Did I say childhood? Because it's still pretty much true...


_________________
Like the crackling of thorns under the pot, so is the laughter of fools. ~ Solomon
I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. ~ D.H. Lawrence


IstominFan
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Nov 2016
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,114
Location: Santa Maria, CA.

30 Jan 2017, 6:17 pm

That could also have described me. Academically I was above average, socially below average. I was also very serious about my academic studies, which didn't win me many friends. I was also physically clumsy, not athletic at all. Who could have imagined I'd be taking tennis lessons in my 50s. I can relate to everything FandomConnection and Tuesday's Child wrote, because that could be my life story, too.



Lumi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Sep 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,513
Location: Positive-minded

30 Jan 2017, 6:50 pm

Is there a way to guess mental age (maybe a bit accurately)?


_________________
Slytherin/Thunderbird


EzraS
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 24 Sep 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,828
Location: Twin Peaks

31 Jan 2017, 12:50 am

I'm a combination of being mature and competent and needing to be looked after like a little child.



SteveSnow
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 23 Dec 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 172
Location: Minnesota

31 Jan 2017, 12:18 pm

I've immersed myself in social situations to try to learn how other adults act and I still feel like I belong with people much younger than I am on an emotional level. Intellectually I'm happy to discuss more age appropriate topics.


_________________
I'm not a doctor but I play one on t.v.


the_phoenix
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jan 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,489
Location: up from the ashes

31 Jan 2017, 12:23 pm

I can't resist, kitty4670,

... but two things come to mind whenever I see the title of this thread topic and your name as the thread starter:

1) I wonder how old you would be in cat years?

2) I wonder if your age is 4670?

... Please note that the above commentary is meant as good-natured humor. :)

...

As for figuring out my age ... :jester:



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 50
Gender: Male
Posts: 116,760
Location: In my little Olympic World of peace and love

31 Jan 2017, 12:30 pm

I don't really care what my actual age is. I do the things that make me happy. If the conformers don't like it, too bad.


_________________
The Family Enigma


SocOfAutism
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 2 Mar 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,911

31 Jan 2017, 12:51 pm

FandomConnection wrote:
It is worth mentioning that I do not consider myself to have a family. I physically have parents, and a sibling, but they have never wanted a child who is not 'normal', and have constantly punished/berated me for being how I am. My parents are also manipulative, have caused me emotional and social damage, and do not support me emotionally. I don't feel that I have had a stable enough emotional upbringing to mature normally, so this may be the cause.


That's awful. Really, it's awful.

Maybe it's good that you realize this early and can just move on from it.

You know, a long time ago in some college class I had this story in an assignment. I lost it so I have no idea what this story was called or who wrote it. It was about an angel who was on earth. It was written very realistically, so you were to believe that there was for real an angel, with the wings and all, walking around on earth. At first everyone loved and adored him and marveled over him. But then he didn't DO anything. He just walked around with his wings, which eventually grew raggedy. No miracles happened. People started to treat him like a poor old abused homeless dog. They laughed at him, threw rocks, wished he'd go away. The story had some weird anticlimatic ending...I think maybe the angel just lay down and died and no one learned their lesson.

I sure wish I hadn't lost that story because it's really stuck in my mind all these years. It was such a great example of how sometimes people don't appreciate something wonderful and different right in front of them- a miracle- that they can't control and maybe doesn't behave the way they think it should- but still a miracle.



the_phoenix
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jan 2008
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,489
Location: up from the ashes

31 Jan 2017, 1:01 pm

SocOfAutism wrote:
I sure wish I hadn't lost that story because it's really stuck in my mind all these years. It was such a great example of how sometimes people don't appreciate something wonderful and different right in front of them- a miracle- that they can't control and maybe doesn't behave the way they think it should- but still a miracle.


Well, if you can't find the angel story, there's always the Bible.
In that one, humanity crucifies Christ.
You can see the parallels I'm sure.
But that's not the end of the story ...

Anyways, to make this a thread-related post,
are we figuring out age according to the AD calendar? :)



Tripodologia
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Nov 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 145
Location: Norway

31 Jan 2017, 5:22 pm

I have people constantly think that I'm younger than I actually am, probably because of how I dress (not very feminine), the fact that I barely use make up, and because of having a small frame. Inside, I basically don't feel age at all. Depending on the situation I may feel like a fully grown-up adult (i.e. when at a work meeting), or like a little kid. Age to me is a very weird concept, all in all; I understand the physical and somewhat cognitive decline as one gets older, and things like executive issues and defiance as a teenager when the brain is still maturing, but to me, social expectations based on age don't really make sense.


_________________
Really enjoyed being a yellow-throated woodpecker while it lasted.

-

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 139 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 67 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


IstominFan
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 25 Nov 2016
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 11,114
Location: Santa Maria, CA.

31 Jan 2017, 9:26 pm

I have had both ends of the spectrum. Academically, my fellow students said I was smart, but too serious, which didn't win me friends. Emotionally and socially, I was immature for my age, which also didn't win me many friends. Years later, people told me they wanted to talk to me but they didn't know how. I think they wondered which me would show up that day, the serious, studious type or the little girl who appeared so clumsy and awkward she appeared to be mentally handicapped.



EclecticWarrior
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Nov 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,001
Location: Cool places

31 Jan 2017, 11:48 pm

I want more independence. However, I still feel like a 14 year old trapped in a body soon to turn 26. I don't want to change my teenage mindset.


_________________
~Zinc Alloy aka. Russell~

WP's most sparkling member.

DX classic autism 1995, AS 2003, depression 2008

~INFP~