general/specific - issues on here - (not threadworthy)

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hi.

just wondering if anyone else has noticed that when people debate around here they ignore the context that people are talking in? like if someone is speaking in general terms, people debate back as if they were being specific about something and vice versa.

like if i were to say "in general adults with ASDs can learn to control their stims", someone will come back and 'argue' with me saying, "no not everyone can, for instance i still have this stim that stim and so do alot of people"...but i was talking in GENERAL TERMS that alot of people with ASDs CAN...but they respond like i was speaking about every person on the spectrum individually, or THEM specifically.

but if i were to say something like "i can not learn to control this stim i have it seems impossible", someone will respond with something like "no no you CAN learn to control your stims, it is known that most adults grow out of their stims." so, i was talking specifically about myself but they respond as if i were talking about aspies in general....whaaaaaat???????

it's like there's no way to avoid conflict. surely with all the intelligent people here not everyone can be so oblivious to context like this?? or are people CHOOSING to IGNORE context so they can start a debate??

BUT....it may be just me (i thought it was for sure, but i think i've seen it happen in arguments that i'm not involved in a few times now), i guess that's what i'm trying to find out. i'm not into debating/conflict and i don't have the wits/brainpower to keep up, especially around here.

Well if you're talking about a generality that you know isn't always the case, it helps to just say so.. then there's nothing to argue. Otherwise, like if you say that a particular thing can be controlled, if someone who reads it can't control that particular thing, they're going to feel like that statement means it's their fault, or they're just not trying hard enough. A lot of people here have just had issues with that in the past, being accused of not trying when they couldn't or didn't know how to do something. So if they say nothing, it's like more people get the idea that they should be able to do that something.
Also, a great deal of people around here are information freaks. I know personally, I find that a lot of time even if I agree with a point, I might still find fault with a particular piece of information used in making that point, if it's incorrect or irrelevant. Part of that might be to strengthen the point (a point made on incorrect information, even if that point is still correct, is weaker than a correct point made o solid information)
Also, if it's an issue of somebody feeling like they can't do something, I think a lot of times people want to be supportive and encourage them to at least try, even if it is possible that they won't be able to do it. Certainly, they're more likely to be able to if they believe they can and have some tips on how to do so, than if they believe they can't and don't have any help.