about Meltdowns feelings

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my meltdowns feels like too much information everything getting too far i get extreme overreaction everything gets worst and lost sense touch and switch off during extreme anger and frustrated and anxious constantly very fast but i dont hurt mum and threating her calling her names i hate this feeling because sometimes i hate my mum that because my special interest weather and stuff and my mum doesn't care about my special interest she had obsession with internet turn off about i dont want know about that it is really pissed me off some reason obsession with world of warcraft and but havent done anything wrong i hate routines changed thats what hes doing trying ruined everything that i dont like i was sooo pissed at world of earth neighbours hear my screams and shouting yelling at my mother after that i said i hate you mum so much or do you want me disapeared or not shouting at her and left her after that i didnt fell over the baby gate i didnt know it was there and fell off broke it the gate didnt kick it just walk through it and went my room graped my pillow screams in frustations about the pillow and then crying before out of control because i didnt mean to that beacause i had too much information in my head about everything annoying situtation i got so embarssed after calm down

I'm having a lot of trouble understanding what you are saying because you don't use any punctuation or paragraph breaks. That and you sound very jumbled. To the best of my ability, I will try to help you anyway.

On the subject of your meltdowns...

What are your triggers? Which ones are the worst?

What causes your meltdowns to increase in intensity? What is pushing you to the edge?

Can you handle being around people when this is happening? Do you feel like you are unsafe to others?

Do you become dangerous to yourself? Do you try to hurt yourself?

Do lights, colours, sounds, touch, etcetera make things harder? Are they one of your triggers and if so, can you elaborate on that?

Are you getting confused and overwhelmed or are you just losing your temper? How do things spiral out of control?

I try to convince my triggered mind that the If I were to calm down i'd notice the details which is where the work needs to be done:/ How do you experience the world from your perspective?
Take care!

If you're having trouble being around others, then you need to sit down or walk into the hallway for a minute. Alternatively, you could also hide around the corner. Sometimes, you just need to put some space between you and other people. It can help you calm down a lot faster, especially if your problem is related to the people that are currently around you.

When sensory issues are overloading you, at that point you really must sit down, even if it's in the same room as others. Close your eyes and bury your face into your hands. Hold that pose for a little while and give yourself a chance to calm down. Stop thinking about everything and everyone around you. Block out the world, but don't focus on your problems. Just relax and empty your mind.

Lots of confusion can really make things worse, so don't try to make any decisions, big or small, while you are in such a state. Be careful what you say to people, because once you've said something, it's out there. You may not mean anything bad by it, but other people may still take it the wrong way. If you are not able to control yourself and say something upsetting anyway, then once you are back in charge of your emotions, give yourself some time to return to a balanced state. After that, explain to anyone you might have offended that you were simply overwhelmed and didn't mean anything by it. There are many ways that you can make the wrong choices, but hopefully you are surrounded by people that can be understanding and sympathetic.

My feelings are that I have learned to ride out the storm, they are much more draining if I try to circumvent the process and diminish the burning importance that is radiating from my core of frustration/distress/overwhelming corona/offended soul slash etc it just grows and grows if I don't let it run its course.