Deep thoughts, Anxiety similarities NT/AS

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My boyfried is AS. I am NT and developed anxiety 5 years ago after a traumatic event. I was just thinking about how I have changed since that time and it made me theorize a connection. I know I am not very informed, just throwing my thoughts out there. The number one change in me has been isolating myself more and not being there as much for others. I know I appear less uninterested with others lives as i was before, more short tempered, short attention span and less available. I am sure this appears as selfish. I feel really bad about it. It is not because I care any less but because it takes a lot of inward energy to avoid stress and maintain the energy I need to accomplish the necessities of my own daily life (which I do so poorly). It occurred to me that those who are AS have possibly experienced this their whole lives. And have only always had to put all of their effort into themselves to avoid stressors that cause anxiety. And as a habit is all they know. This also comes off as selfish. A difference being that I have experienced the majority of my life without anxiety and know the difference between my personality then and now. And I know how to manage it when I need to. I feel that some parts of my brain disengage when I am stressed (I shut down to avoid a breakdown). I imagine that this is how AS feels all the time but because it is all they have ever experienced they do not know the feelings of not feeling like that or how to manage it. And that while very capable of love and empathy have a hard time exercising this part of the brain for trying so hard to maintain a stress free environment. Not selfish, just self preserving and very mindful of what they need to do this. Like I said just my personal thoughts, I may be way off or may have gained some understanding from my experience.

It goes to show that NTs and Spectrumites aren't as different as each think they are.

That's what I've been saying all along. I think NTs are similar to Aspies underneath. Besides, we're all humans after all.
Often I think that I feel about a certain thing a certain way because I have Asperger's, but then I come across a group of NTs discussing the exact thing (without me bringing it up or anything), and I feel much better.