Why are we loud?

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Among the many things I've read some Aspies do one that I have ALOT is I'm loud without knowing it at times. I tend to talk loud (when I'm talking about something interesting) or when going outside I always tend to slam the back door (this is when the kids are asleep. I was also loud while getting a bowl of chips. I was curious WHY do Aspies do this, is it that part of the brain doesn't process something? Sure I can be quiet (if it's for me like when I was writing research papers I needed quiet in my room and couldn't concentrate in the school setting.)

Normally I feel that I'm pretty quiet....I get annoyed even if I slam a door. The only times I've been told that I'm loud is when I'm speaking about one of my interests. Maybe that's because I'm excited that someone is willing to listen.

I've thought about this, because I'll sometimes get very loud (or inaudible at other times) without realizing it. I have been called on this multiple times. I think that NTs tend to instinctively modulate the tone and volume of their voice to fit the situation at hand, while individuals on the spectrum tend to lack that instinct.
I think that I tend to get loud when especially anxious and/ or stressed. Conversely, I also may get loud when I'm talking about something I'm really excited/ passionate about. I'm likely to become inaudible when I feel like I'm "supposed" to speak, but *really* don't want to, or if I'm feeling especially down on myself.
I find that I need to consciously think about the volume of my voice if I want to "get it right." Often, there are too many other things on my mind, and it just doesn't occur to me to do that. Who has the energy/ presence of mind to constantly monitor the volume of his/ her voice? I really haven't figured out how to resolve this particular issue.

I do notice that as I get excited about whatever I'm talking about (whether its a special interest or I'm upset about something), my voice does get louder, without my realizing it unless someone points it out. Over the years, I have become more aware of it myself, so I can back it off when I notice it happening, but sometimes it's kind of embarrassing to suddenly realize that I'm talking MUCH LOUDER than I was when the conversation started a few minutes ago.

Otherwise, I'm usually pretty quiet, though I do have a tendency to talk to myself when I'm alone. Often in other people's voices.

When I get excited or passionate about something I tend to lose my volume/pitch control.

I talk louder when I become stressed. Lately it happens more when talking on the phone to a friend when their voice is loud or high pitched right in my ear, or a subject starts to stress me, or if they're talking too fast in a way that is difficult to follow I will react to that. I frequently have to ask them to get to the point because I can't follow a long line of verbiage or be taken in circles because they like to hear themselves talk and to which I am incapable really of being able to listen to a lot of the time.

I do, too.

To be fair though...I take particular offense to being told right in the middle of when I'm talking about it to lower my voice.

Reason being: if the person I were speaking to honestly gave a sh!t about what I had to say, I figure they would be so focused on what I'm saying, that the concern about my getting louder when I get excited would be minimal compared to y'know--what I'm actually saying.

It basically indicates they really don't care what I have to say....just about making sure I "say it right". And that I find very insulting.

I'm a quiet person who has an inability to raise my voice. Even when I yell it's not terribly loud.

My mum on the other hand will enter my bedroom and have a song and dance while I am reading. She has no volume control. I will be trying to get to sleep and she is gasbagging on the phone.

I too get louder when talking about something I like ,but yes , do same when stressed and am trying to make my point. Idon't realise I'm loud at that moment. Then I see person's face and pick up cues. generally, haven't ever been able to alter this trait as each 'scene' that generates the loudness is different and I need time to respond when i don't want to be 'loud'.

But, also i get told i talk too softly, ..me trying to not be loud. But im not perceived as a "loud" individual.
Someone once called me garrulous.! Once!

no people. barely hear me. even when i try to talk "loud". i was raised to be quiet and that's how i'll always be.

I talk really quietly, probably a sensory thing, so when I say I talk louder I mean more to a normal volume where I at least usually can be heard better and which is loud for me, when I get very frustrated. As a general rule I am asked to repeat myself a lot or others speak louder to compensate for my quiet tones which is also unnerving. That's why I don't talk very much anymore to anyone. I just can't take all the problems involved in it.

I don't think they realize they are loud. I am not aware when I am talking loud and how far people can hear me. People can hear my conversations a block away. In Montana, people could hear me down the hall from the housekeeping office at my old job. My husband says I'm loud when he is in bed. I have the TV on, I pace and I listen to music on my laptop but I do try to be quiet. I expect him to tell me if the TV is too loud or not or else I assume it's not a problem for him. I assume it isn't.

Last edited by Spokane_Girl on 01 Feb 2010, 8:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

I am never, NEVER loud. If I try to yell in a bar to ask for a drink, no matter how loud I think I am, the bartender can still never hear me. And everyone I know is constantly asking me to speak up. My mother used to constantly jab at me for talking too quietly. Personally, I always just though everybody else was being too loud, and I was just right!

There are devices with dynamic volume/record levels. Basically, how loud or sensitive they are depends on ambient noise.

So, the more noise I perceive around me, the louder I get.

Still, for some reason I just don't register how loud I'm actually being when I talk. Only if I'm wanting to be quiet do I watch how loud I'm getting.

I seem to be loud most of the time........a poor person asked me to lower my voice on the phone the other day when I had rung to enquire about my upcoming psychometric testing

But........I can hear a pin drop. No problems with my hearing.

Mics

I also HATE when in the middle of talking SHHH! You are being too loud. Me:Oh. The more I think about it the more I thank I need to stop talking to my family about my special interest since they don't seem to care. My sister was awesome on the NY vacation I asked her why and she said she was on vacation so she had all the time in the world to listen to me while normally her/family are busy working so they don't have time.