I can only have normal conversations when it comes to my...

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interests. Is anyone like this?


I can carry on a conversation if it's my obsession or interest. But other than that I suck. I can listen and I go "oh" to let the person know I am listening. Trying to think of something to say is like telling a story when I have to think of things to say. One of my aspie friends gets bothered by it and feels I am ignoring him even though I am reading what he is saying and I say "oh" but to him that is not a normal conversation. Things he talks about is boring but I expect him to listen to what I say and talk about what I talk about so I do the same in return by listening. But there is nothing I am curious about. He asks me to fake interests but I don't know why I find that hard. Maybe I need to try harder but I don't know what to say. I am doing other things and I can't sit here and think of what to say. I find that tiring. Maybe I am just too lazy to try because it's my free time and I find that work if I have to do it. I don't expect people to fake things with me because I don't want to torture them and make it hard work for them.

Same here. People always talk about stuff I don't have much knowledge about and so I can't think of much to say.

Why would he want you to fake interest?
I can only do a few kinds of conversations adequately (in my opinion); monologue, dialogue about something I want to know (mainly just asking questions) and randomly spouting hilarious comments.

I can have a normal conversation about anything but the only thing is that I do it ALOT worse and sometimes alot faster when it comes to my special interest and that is SO much of a problem to alot of people so I normally keep my interests discreet.

Today happened to just slip..... I started talking about planets... and that is one of my old obsessions, thank goodness I didn't go as far as black holes today because that would have completely lost me.

Trouble with this is, I have really good recall and can link ideas and pull meaning out of a pile of turnips if I have to,

They then think you are interested in them and they don't get you using this technique as a social deflector.

If they think you are interested in them then you are stuck with an NT and you have to keep playing the role.

Best to be a bit interested, and try to ascertain what they actually want from you whilst they are.

When it comes to stuff I'm interested in, I can't converse, I can only lecture. It's probably no fun for the poor person who has to listen to me.

My problem is that I have an exceptionally good memory, and an encyclopedic knowledge of pretty much anything I've ever been interested in. Which sounds as though I should be a great conversationalist... but unfortunately I have to really fight the impulse to lecture folks.

What else is interesting is the fact that if I ask someone about their special interest and they have a broad knowledge, and I'm interested, I don't mind being lectured. For example, my son knows far more about the English Civil War than I do. He went through a phase when he read compulsively on it. And I don't mind that... if I ask him, and he goes into lecture mode, I actually enjoy learning.

I find it hard that most people aren't interested in learning new things. I seem to have theory of mind for aspies, but it all falls down when it comes to NTs.

Yes I can talk to people about my interests easily and never am short of things to say. When it comes to responding to others though I tend to sit there and nod my head or say "oh ok" because other than that, I don't know what to do.

I don't think you should have to fake an interest in what your friend is talking about. Isn't it better to be honest and ask to change the topic? I may be wrong but that's what I would do.

I can do a little bit of small talk like 'how was your day' and things like that, but when the conversation gets to talking about social relationships, like gossiping about someone or reminiscing a wild night out I will just lose interest and turn off. Once people just kept talking about this girl and her family and I just didn't care.
Then they talk about the news, which I have a bit of an interest in but if it's celebrity gossip or about sport stars I don't care. I care more about murder investigations, science discoveries, etc.

That is the story of my life right there!
If I'm in a conversation about things I'm really interested in I'm amazing, I talk the most and say everything with excitement and expression and I often have to stop myself from lecturing them about my interest. But as soon as the topic changes I go quiet again, I also get really annoyed when the topic is changed because I was having fun talking about what I'm obsessed with and I want to say more things, and sometimes I'll even revert to the old topic briefly just to make one more point. And like L_G I will just go "yep. yep. right" when they talk about what they like but I have nothing to add and the conversation becomes harder to carry on. Or I'm just not interested at all and I'm waiting for them to shut up so I can start on one of my interests again .
I love to listen and observe people's conversations and do so frequently but I rarely take part in them because I have NOTHING TO ADD even if I tried. My good friends are of course an exception to this rule and I can take part in conversations about what they like... as long as my interests are mentioned as well of course

Oh yeah. I'm pretty sure I come across as almost NT during discussions pertaining to my interest. Feels good to feel normal once in a while.