Analyzing how people treat us vs NTs

Post Reply New Topic

There's times that I've seen that some people will treat people differently, and it will be like night and day.

Lemme give you an example. One of my brothers has a very good friend. This guy, when he's around my brother and speaking directly to him, will be all happy and excited, and he ALMOST seems like a nice person.

But when he's talking to me, his demeanor changes completely. It turns to a rather nasty demeanor of a bully. I'd label this attitude as "I don't give a f***-ism" and it's not like I ever did anything to him. It's been this way since we were children and it's never changed, even though we're all in our 30s. It's like, I don't care if I EVER see this kid again, and apparently my feelings mean nothing to my brother as he's NEVER ONCE stuck up for me to his friend.

I don't get it. Why's he so nice to my brother and so f***ing mean and nasty to me?

I hate it when something like this happens - someone is horrible to you, yet everyone else seems to love them!

But yeah, I have experienced a similar thing, where someone is nice to everyone apart from me, even though I haven't done anything to cause it.

I suspect it may be because we come across as shy and unlikely to defend ourselves, so people are more willing to show their true colours or vent their frustrations on to you. Whereas if they did the same thing to someone else they'd get punch in the face, or at least a verbal dressing down.

Another explaination could be that we maybe don't show the correct body language indicating that we "like" this person, and we can come across as being snobs, so maybe they are being nasty because they think we don't like them?

I get that treatment, all the time. People are nice to their friends, yet they treat me like garbage. I had a supervisor shread right through me, nearly three weeks, ago.

OMG this has happened to me too!

There was someone I knew who would come across as the most sweet and loving caring person on the planet but when noone else was around except me she would just change into a totally different person. But she was all nice and sweet even with her best friend but just plain different and nasty to me, oh and she was also nasty to her kids also and I once even caught her out being nasty to these kids she was babysitting aswell. She had everyone fooled that she was a different person. How the hell does someone manage to do that? and I was always wondering why she dropped her guard when i was around.

we call people like this sociopaths.

Give him a good punch or a good spitting on. That should show him you are not one to be messed with.

I noticed it in my childhood. Kids were mean to me but be nice to each other. Even one of my own friends did it to me.

Last edited by League_Girl on 21 Mar 2010, 8:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

hmm..... NTs are like zombies, the only cure is a bullet to the brain. /Sarcasm/

This reminds me of the movie, 'Rain Man'.

If you're a girl the issue may be that the guy is gay, in which case he has the hots for your brother but he sees no reason to be nice to you.

That might be completely untrue but I have no problem thinking unjustified nasty things about people who treat me that way.

I do notice that people who are generally considered nice by almost everyone else are not nice when they are alone with me. I think it's because they think for some reason that others consider my feelings less valid because I don't have a network of friends who would defend me so they can treat me as they wish without doing themselves social damage.

Does anyone here remember that movie from 1992 "The Hand That Rocks The Cradle"? remember how the nanny was nice to everyone except the gardener who was mentally challenged, she would drop the act and just be her nasty self?

The same thing happened to me as well as a child. My so called "best friends" never stuck up for me when she should have. I always wondered how could my friends be involved in all the nasty things being said to me; perhaps they were right and something was wrong with me. My dad says terrible mean things to me all the time as if I were not in the room and taunts me during meltdowns. I threatned to punch him a few times and just might someday. My parents aren't as knowedgeable about AS as they claim to be. But if one of my brothers or some "friend" of the family makes a nasty comment or treats me less, I will not hesitate to soc them.

No, this guy is definitely NOT gay. Plus he's married, to a woman that's even older than ME. If guys all treated me badly because they were gay then the whole male population of my school would have been gay, and that's just ridiculous to contemplate. I think I got stuck in a locale where the majority of males turned out to be douche bags. Including my own brothers. Must be something in the water.

yeah, this is one thing I've sorta discovered about my own friends and other people in general.

I can't say they're nasty to me per se, but they're utterly incompetent, neglectful, and just have an "I don't care" attitude when dealing with me, apparently; it's like my friendship just doesn't mean anything to them.

It's like the more you really get to know people, the lousier they really are. They're just trying to keep up appearances.

Funny enough, it's proven to me that they're totally wrong when they say that politicians don't represent them. They insist that they're back-stabbing douchebags who would screw over their own best friend at the drop of a hat for more money and power. To which my response is "so they are just like the people they represent!"

It's also taught me to always have a "bargaining chip" with other people; they know they can count on me when they need me....and no, I can't count on them...

But don't think I don't let 'em know it; what are they gonna do to me? Tell me that I don't mean anything to them? Yeah I kinda already know that...

^ I've had experience with that, myself. I still remember one time when I was in the cub scouts we had a meeting and one of the other kids who wasn't even liked by the other kids attacked me out of the blue and was choking me in front of the other kids. At this point I wasn't very good at fighting but by a fluke I knocked him into a wall pretty roughly and he started to cry. The old broads who were the den mothers who weren't watching came over when they heard him crying. I told my story but all of the other kids, including my best friend at the time, told the old soccer mom broads that I had started it. Needless to say, I was in trouble and those washed up soccer moms wouldn't believe me because it was my word against everyone else's. Because they wouldn't believe me and my shock that everyone lied against me, I was mad, so I insulted the den mothers and got into even more trouble and my parents punished me severely.

I still haven't forgotten that. A little while back I was called for jury duty, and the accusations against the defendant were pretty serious. However, the only evidence that was presented against the defendant were witness accounts. The other 11 jurors wanted to convict the defendant, but ever since the aforementioned incident I treat any eyewitness account with full contempt. I held steadfast and a mistrial was declared and the defendant eventually got off and offended again. I still don't regret it even though some people were mad at me for it.

Well, here's the advantage we actually have over NTs in this situation:

Despite how they're always so positive "we can tell when someone else isn't being genuine", more often than not, they can't.

The sociopath/BS artist not only makes up a bigger chunk of society than most are willing to admit, but have a very unfortunate affect on society; they actually manage to influence most of society, if you think about it. This would indicate that on a certain level, most of society does in fact approve of said behavior.

Well, we're given a "front row seat" of the experience, as they won't hide their true colors from us, so we get to see just how lousy people are.

It really has gotten me to realize how not worth it most of socialization is; it's basically putting on a face for everyone else and pretending you care about something when you don't. If that sends good vibes back and forth...why does being phony send good vibes? I think that's incredibly sick and depraved.

I'd rather just be myself; if people don't like it, they don't like it. They treat me like s**t, I barely engage with them; and I assure you, I'll still find a way to succeed whether they're in my life or not.