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Scoots5012
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11 Dec 2004, 1:26 am

I was seeing my counsler this morning (last time for the semester) and during the course of conversation, my counsler commented to me that she enjoyed talking to me since I was able to "follow" and "adapt" to the movement of her conversation.

I asked why and she told me that when she talks to NT's, and something I've recently noticed myself is that they seem to expect the flow of the conversation to go down a certain path, and steping off that path results in confusion on the part of NT's, where as in apsies, she has noticed, they just adapt to the new path and continue on with out hesitation.

Which might explain a life long question of mine where I often end up ignored when I try to join a conversation is becasue maybe I'm trying lead the conversation "off the path".

She feels that aspies don't have "defective" conversation skills, but more "advanced" conversation skills.

Any thoughts?


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JennieRichee
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11 Dec 2004, 2:12 am

heh... Your counselor sounds cool.
One thing I've noticed is that alot of NTs can't talk about an issue without trying to win the argument. I enjoy dabating as an analytical tool, but I'm interested in the idea rather than competition. I don't understand conversations that are really just games of social one-up-man-ship.
Of course this doesn't apply to all NTs, but those it does apply to can't seem to follow any point that isn't relevant to this game. :?



coyote
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11 Dec 2004, 1:04 pm

That's funny. I noticed long ago, and still today, when i just listen, i spot so many communication error between NTs. Most of the time, they don't put enough words, or they put the wrong ones, so other don't understand exactly what was meant. But still, they don't even noticed that they haven't understood well what was said, and they continue on the error, commiting more of them.

In the workplace, this ends up with error in the work, not giving the customer what was need. And yet, the customer just correct the shot without beeing angry, they found normal that this or this details was not understood well.

80% of the time, i can see in advance what error in the customer order will be commited because i can see that this or this detail was understood wrongly. Very often i jumped into the subject to have the error avoided, but they all feels insulted and even if i had everyone avoid the error, i'm not recognized for it. I'm just recognized as beeing pedant ! Of couse, the story never make it to the boss and when it does, they all agree that I was the one who was to commit an error and that they saved the show :evil:



animallover
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11 Dec 2004, 1:46 pm

I enjoy watching conversations and interaction in the same way I would enjoy watching monkeys at the zoo . . .

I find that when I am required to talk to someone (or want to on occassion) I warn them that I don't think like other people (well, most people I would choose to talk to know that) and I tell them when I'm about to change the conversation topic . . . like last night I was talking to my favorite person to be around and we were talking about one of his ex-es, I think, and I can't relate to that so I started to say something to redirect this back to a topic I wanted to talk about and he started to say something at the same time and being polite he was going to let me talk but I said 'I'm about the change the topic - go on . . .' - so that let him finish what he wanted to say and then we got off that topic and back onto something interesting - my cats!



echospectra
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11 Dec 2004, 2:50 pm

I often find myself in the function of interpreter between NTs; when people are arguing and I listen for a while and ask a question here and there I often find out that they're much more in agreement than they think they are. Then I try to put this "common ground" into words, pointing out nuances, sometimes causing the whole argument to sort of disappear... The nasty thing about this is that it takes so much mental energy that I can never stop to think what my own opinion is, leaving me with the feeling that I haven't really said anything at all...