I need too much alone time

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Title might not be clear, let me explain.

I get easily overwhelmed by crowds, humans, loudmouths, too much small talk etc. They are talking too much and nonsense. I hate that aspect of human nature

So it becomes a necessity to stay alone and chill.

That is unfortunately not easy most of the time. Im living in a big city and there are lots of noise and sh**

On the flip side when I look at my nt peers, they seem to really enjoy life with noise and crowds. Probably its the right thing to do, living life to the fullest. So that begs the question, am I wasting my life with insisting on loneliness ? I've already wasted a lot. I tried staying together with normies and fitting in, but it's not me. That feels too weird, drains my desire to live. But, my hate towards crowds and nt humans, it's something I cant control. So it's more like a fate.

Do any of you feel similarly, and how did you get over that? I dont want to regret later for my solitary lifestyle

Want to know your opinions

I think you can get yourself into a mess trying to do what NT society tells you is 'living life to the fullest'. What's right for them might not be what's right for you. It's your life. What's the point of forcing yourself into situations where you're constantly uncomfortable? That doesn't sound like a life well-lived to me.

I think the best thing anyone can do is try to know themselves. Work out what you like and surround yourself with that stuff. A lot of people are noisy and annoying, but there are also very cool, chilled out and quiet people around - they just tend to be less visible.

I feel for you living in the city. I tried to live and work in London after I studied. I lasted two weeks. I knew I hated cities just from visiting. I don't know why I thought I could live in a massive one. But like you I was doing what I thought you were supposed to do. It just wasn't for me. If you don't like it, I'd suggest you get out if you can.

The question is not simply NT vs ND.

Are you an introvert or extrovert? Probably the former which means being with people will drain your energy, beyond just overstimulation from noise and crowds.

"Living your best life" how exactly? Clubs, bars, parties, and concerts? A life of thrillseeking and hedonism sounds shallow to me.

im enjoy being alone

i hate being with people and im happy when alone

i work as a bus driver so i have to deal with people but i love driving buses so its a small price to pay i suppose and yes i do wish they still had bus conducters so i wouldnt have to interact with anyone but im not shy with the public i can be very authorative and i literally lack empathy so i dont get overwhelmed by the emotions of the passengers like some autistics might
im just happy driving the bus as i feel i understand the bus better than the people

i know i will never regret wanting to be alone because i know my brain isnt wired to desire human interaction and i accepted that years ago and im happy with it

I don't call interacting with others in noisy crowded places "living life to its fullest" that is more like my personal version of hell!
I find other things to do that are not over stimulating, I plan trips to quiet places, I grow house plants, collect rocks and fossils, work with animals, add to my collections, find parks, museums, the library, early morning hours are almost always quieter in the city. You may have interests you have put on hold because others said they were not "grown up" or "appropriate" to your age or stage of life. You may love doing things that others have ridiculed or teased you about. Be you, and don't worry about what "they" are doing. There is no "way it is supposed to be", where everybody must enjoy the same things. Do what is right for you!
There are hundreds of things you can do by yourself or in a small group. There is nothing wrong with living a quiet sort of life. Fill that with things you love, places you find peace, people or pets, activities that are pleasing to you. Nobody else in the world has to approve if you decide to do something most people do not do. Find your passions and fill your life with good stuff. What is good for you is not necessarily good for any body else, and that Is OK.

living life to the fullest is doing what you like to do as long as it isnt hurting yourself or others

there is no one size fits all way to live life to the fullest

"Hell is other people" Jean Paul Sartre

TBH, there are definitely a few possibilities here. But, this sounds suspiciously like what I've got, which is looking more and more like schizoid personality disorder with a ton of autistic traits. If you don't feel a drive to have social interactions other than that other people seem to be enjoying it and a sense of FOMO, then you might be.

Or, in other words, if you're sort of a person within a person, or feel a pathalogical drive for independence, that's also a bit of a sign that it might be the personality disorder rather than autism. But, really, ScPD probably should be recognized as an autism profile as there were many decades of it being used as such diagnostically and a significant minority of autistic people are diagnosable as both.

As much as it pains me to say it, just having a lack of drive to interact with other people doesn't get the OP off the hook for the negative health consequences of not doing so. And it really does pain me, as I resent the forced choice of my health or the isolation that makes me feel better.

There's no guarantee that this will continue, as in most cases even the hardcore loners usually do get lonely eventually. It's more like autistic people that struggle to identify hunger. They still have to eat, or they'll die, they just either lack the drive to eat or the ability to identify the hunger.

Not everybody in the world feels that noise and crowds is the only kind of social life there is. I don't have much of a social life myself these days, but what there is of it is fairly quiet and can be a fulfilling experience for me. I'm at my best when I'm working with other people on some common purpose, chiefly playing music but any genuinely common interest will do.

I require more alone time than anyone I have ever met. I need time alone to prepare for outings and social interactions, then I need time alone to recover from them. My life is a balancing act of figuring what I want to do and then planning appropriate down time around that so I can do those things that matter to me and see the people I value. I don't feel short changed over it, and when I get the balancing act down right, I value/cherish both the alone time and the out/social time very much. I'm trying to think how to explain it... if someone or something is worth my metaphorical spoons, it seems to be of more worth than silly little things that people take for granted. If that makes sense. I'd rather have a few things that matter to me than a bunch that don't mean anything at all. We all have to decide for ourselves what matters, look in not out, and spend our time and energy there. Seems to me those things are wasted trying to do things that mean nothing to you, but you feel you should do because others do them. You have to wake up in your skin and life every day, not theirs. Do what works for you, do what matters to you. My two cents.

That's pretty poetic!