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JSBACHlover
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03 Mar 2014, 11:29 pm

I came upon this theory called "Positive Disintegration," which was posited by a Polish psychologist named Dabrowski. His theory is related to the "Highly Sensitive Person" phenomenon so common to those of us with HFA. He's basically saying that people with super-sensitivity to stimuli and who think differently from the majority, possess souls with a greater capacity for development and individuality; and, that such development comes at the price of experiencing many life episodes of "disintegration" and suffering.

It's pretty much the story of my life.
Look at this link and tell me if this rings true for you.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Positive_Disintegration



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04 Mar 2014, 12:03 am

In my 20s I first awakened to the understanding that even my most dearly held beliefs could be gouged out of me at a moment's notice by experience, and that my belief system was going to be a dynamic, fluid, work-in-progress pretty much forever, rather than a solid thing to be built upon. For example, I used to believe in one "soul mate" until age of 24 when my soul mate married another woman. Likewise, I feel like many of my naive beliefs about life and about people are continually being torn down to reveal a more honest version of reality (I hope).


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btbnnyr
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04 Mar 2014, 12:09 am

It sounds like psychobabble.


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04 Mar 2014, 12:14 am

I really needed to read this, thanks.

Some I relate too and I'm still working my way through the text, but I didn't have much social development, or rather it was late, and since I've pretty much given up on it since I've learned it does stifle my free expression.


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04 Mar 2014, 2:14 am

I wish to thank the original poster for drawing my attention to Dabrowski and this theory.

I have HFA and my first book, "A Painful Gift- The Journey of a Soul with Autism" outlines this descent into and through the various stages

I have found the philosophy of Advaita Vedanta comes closet to making sense of the world for me.

To live, to truly live deeply, I have found it essential to move beyond the emptiness and impermanence of belief systems and the identification with the ego)

Some cultures have practices and disciplines to lead people through these stages. However, what I find fascinating is that many people, especially those who are highly imaginative and yes, sensitive, follow this path of transformation.

I used to feel an outsider. Now I feel an insider, watching the drama of people trying so hard to build up their outsides that soon they will have to let go of. ............it's a funny old dance.



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04 Mar 2014, 8:13 am

Autistic traits have been described by many people in many different ways. I think that's mainly because until very recently every one of us would not have known of the existence of others like ourselves. So people like us ended up formulating theories based on their own experiences. Depending on which autistic symptoms they experienced and their respective severity these theories may differ from each other to some extent, but they all have a common core, which today we know is autism.



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04 Mar 2014, 8:28 am

Dabrowski is one of the biggest names in study of giftedness.


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Sweetleaf
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04 Mar 2014, 11:55 am

The gift of misery....oh I am so very happy to have received it.

I admit I couldn't finish reading that, and now my brain hurts...but I am not too fond of the theory I have some 'special gift' and that I need to feel anxious and very depressed to the point of 'disintegration' to develop my personality.....if anything it hasn't helped with that at all, how does one develop much personality when they feel like crap to the extent they don't get out much to really experience life and feeling depressed to the point of having no confidence or anything on top of that having autism which makes it hard to interact with people really does not help the development of personality. Perhaps I don't entirely get the concept but it just sounds like more over-optimistic 'theres nothing wrong with you, you're just more advanced in some way than other humans' type stuff which I simply can't bring myself to buy into.

That said perhaps I will try to finish reading the article later, but from what I did read I'm not so sure I buy this theory.


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04 Mar 2014, 12:10 pm

Dabrowski wasn't talking about autism. What he worked with was giftedness. Gifted people have more traits than just high IQ and they include being sensitive to sensory stuff, emotional stuff, and more. It can read like highly sensitive person plus more, but it's actually looking into a more specific group.

In this group in particular, did Dabrowski do his work. This is about how people don't grow smoothly. In this group, that is noted.

But this is not about autism. It's not trying to describe autism. It's not talking about depression. Sometimes it's not well described, but there is something separate from those ideas and is actually about something that isn't anything diagnosable and is just working with those who are gifted.


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JSBACHlover
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04 Mar 2014, 12:41 pm

Sweatleaf,

I admit the suffering is horrible, and I have been through many periods of hell -- two periods in particular almost destroyed me. Somehow, I did make it through, and each time I emerged as a more purified and better person. A more loving person, toward others and toward myself.

It does require tremendous inner fortitude and will power to climb out of those periods of hell. Medicine helps. Asking for advice from others helps. Having a plan of action is crucial.

There are times when I think it would have been nice to be normal, to never have had crises, to have a regular job, to be happy with boring, to be satisfied by a good dinner, etc. But it's just not my lot. The positive of all this is that when I am doing ok, I am living on a higher and deeper level of existence than most people. I suppose since I only have one life, I'd rather be a person of intensity than dullness. So I've made my peace with it. I hope you can, too. There is no alternative anyway.



JSBACHlover
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04 Mar 2014, 12:42 pm

double post



Last edited by JSBACHlover on 04 Mar 2014, 9:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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04 Mar 2014, 12:54 pm

Thank you, OP, for bringing this up. I found it fascinating, and it explains a lot of things about how my life has played out.

One of the things that really struck me correlates closely with how, since I was in my 20s, have only felt comfortable (in the sense of my ability to communicate with them) around people who I referred to as "old souls" (for lack of better terminology). After reading this summary of TPD, I now see that those "old souls" are people who have achieved the "third factor."

I'm definitely going to be reading more about this.



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04 Mar 2014, 12:56 pm

Tuttle wrote:
Dabrowski wasn't talking about autism. What he worked with was giftedness. Gifted people have more traits than just high IQ and they include being sensitive to sensory stuff, emotional stuff, and more. It can read like highly sensitive person plus more, but it's actually looking into a more specific group.

In this group in particular, did Dabrowski do his work. This is about how people don't grow smoothly. In this group, that is noted.

But this is not about autism. It's not trying to describe autism. It's not talking about depression. Sometimes it's not well described, but there is something separate from those ideas and is actually about something that isn't anything diagnosable and is just working with those who are gifted.


I guess it just irritates me since people in the past have tried to tell me I'm just gifted....for a long time my autism was ignored by everyone because I was just 'gifted' and 'smart'(even though I managed to get called ret*d a lot) according to people. Either way I disagree with the notion that people need to experience things like depression/anxiety to the point of decomposition to develop their personalities...


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Sweetleaf
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04 Mar 2014, 1:07 pm

JSBACHlover wrote:
JSBACHlover wrote:
Sweetleaf,

I admit the suffering is horrible, and I have been through many periods of hell -- two periods in particular almost destroyed me. Somehow, I did make it through, and each time I emerged as a more purified and better person. A more loving person, toward others and toward myself.

It does require tremendous inner fortitude and will power to climb out of those periods of hell. Medicine helps. Asking for advice from others helps. Having a plan of action is crucial.

There are times when I think it would have been nice to be normal, to never have had crises, to have a regular job, to be happy with boring, to be satisfied by a good dinner, etc. But it's just not my lot. The positive of all this is that when I am doing ok, I am living on a higher and deeper level of existence than most people. I suppose since I only have one life, I'd rather be a person of intensity than dullness. So I've made my peace with it. I hope you can, too. There is no alternative anyway.


I wouldn't want to be 'normal' but it would be nice to at least be functional to a greater extent, so maybe I could handle a job and make my own income and it would be nice to have some positive intensity....rather than negative intensity with a lack of intensity in anything positive.


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04 Mar 2014, 1:25 pm

quaker wrote:
I have found the philosophy of Advaita Vedanta comes closet to making sense of the world for me.


Same for me too. :)


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04 Mar 2014, 2:11 pm

What the OP posted makes so much sense. I feel that both my greatest periods of growth and decline have been connected to my extreme sensitivity. Autistics supporting each other is one way we can continue our mystifying growth while minimizing the decline caused by the suffering.