Do NTs or aspies have more overall stress level?

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I think its about the same. Sure, aspies have to deal with all these social troubles but when you have had aspergers all your life you get used to it. NTs, on the other hand, if some part of their relationships go wrong, they aren't used to it and they get stressed.

What do you think?

Social troubles? If you're an Aspie and all you've got are social troubles, you're downright lucky. Try having the whole world overload you; every little unexpected thing throwing you completely off track; either unable to deal with your environment, or just ridiculously far behind everyone else learning things that are supposed to be simple.

No, social stuff is the least of it. I've only barely got to making enough of an attempt at socializing to have any social problems in the first place, because I'm too busy surviving. Granted, it causes less subjective distress not to be focusing on said social issues; but if you're dealing with only social problems, it's a sign you're coping a heck of a lot better than quite a few of us out there.

How much you can do hasn't got much relation to stress level. Being different, on the other hand, has a lot to do with it, because the world's not made for us.

Last edited by Callista on 10 May 2010, 2:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't know much about NTs. But I would say aspies have way more stress to cope with. After all its a strange and alien planet to most.

Well, thats because "I still live under my parent's roof" so you got a good point there. I may have more troubles in the future.

But you've lived that planet for your whole life now.

Until you have lived life both ways, you may never know. Then again if you did, life experiences would change, invalidating the experiment.

Last edited by Mudboy on 10 May 2010, 3:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I have?

must have been dreaming then...

obviously I learned a lot during my years among earthlings, but not enough to feel comfortable
I am so glad I found this place

I'd guess people on the autism spectrum b/c they have the social & coping with an overwhelming world issues. But some NT's can have it really tough depending on the situation. I personally think comparing one general group to another isn't really fair & it should be a situation by situation basis for comparison.

It varies alot - both in the AS and NT population. I myself am stressed out when there is a social component involved, and small things that usually does not bother me cause stress. Also depends on who I'm with, I feel comfortable around a few close friends and my siblings, but not around my parents, strangers or other relatives. On my own, I feel more calm, and not stressed out even though something unexpected happens. I'm not entirely sure how depression adds up in the equation, but it can be both a stress factor, and make me not care if things go wrong. In some sitations, even social ones I'm surpricingly calm, I feel as if I have a low registry of emotions, and my analytical nature/way of thinking helps me see things clearly and helps me cope with stress. Aspies and NTs, have a different mindset, and in general I think social situations cause alot more stress to those with AS, in fact most NT's find social settings relaxing and refreshing. AS is also linked with sensory issues which also cause alot of stress, add a large group of people in a new enviroment - and you have one stressed out aspie. Of course NTs experience stress too, only it's sometimes caused by different factors. For me, my lack of empathy/inability to apply empathy to real life situations and low registry of emotions/inability to understand my emotions, removes alot of the emotional stress most NTs experience. Being social - however, is so integral to our lifes that the 'average' aspie will feel more stressed in general. If this is not the case, you have a lifestyle in which you avoid stress (try living the way a NT would, you'd probably be 10x more stressed) , should consider yourself lucky, or you fail to compare yourself to NTs - which I fear I'm not able to do. Aspies being able to handle more stress in general, sounds like wishfull thinking to me.

Last edited by Assembly on 10 May 2010, 3:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I think that both aspies and NTs feel the same amount of stress. It's just different types of stress, that each population has to deal with.

No, it's not the same kind of stress, or at the same level. As Callista points out, living in a world that was not designed for you puts you under CONSTANT stress, much of which you may not even be consciously aware of a lot of the time, because for an Aspie, that's just everyday life - trying to figure out what the hell is going on and why people are behaving the way they do and whether or not you're doing something wrong that's going to get you yelled at. They don't have all that crap to worry about from minute-to-minute.

For those with neurotypical brains, operating in the NT world is as easy as breathing underwater for a fish - it's their element, so stress is not an issue until something unusual happens and makes things more difficult than they normally would be. They can be subjected to tremendous amounts of stress under certain circumstances, but we are born into stress and anxiety and live with it constantly at one level or another.

Depression comes into the equation when you've been beaten down and harassed and spit on for years because of your inability to speak the native language properly, or do the cultural dance the way everyone else expects it to be done. Sooner or later you're going to reach a point at which you just can't keep struggling on under that emotional burden. If you recharge in solitude, you may recover temporarily, but that depression is almost guaranteed to be chronic and cyclical.

For those who claim "I don't suffer from AS because it's not an affliction" - it's true that Autism does not cause pain - but it draws pain into your life.

I have given up trying to figure out whats going on and why people behave the way they do and even if you do it why is it so stressful? No one yells at me anymore aside from my parents.

And why are people so stressed out in social situations? Its not like you're gonna die if you make a social mistake.

Aspies have more overall stress, no question about it. Lack of social skills, sensitive temperament, and discrimination against those who show those traits.

I've noticed a type of stress that my daughter has that I do not have. It has nothing to do with interactions with other people or sensory issues but it most definately comes from autism. She gets stressed by things not going exactly according to expectations or plan or how they went the last time. She is upset by the unexpected in a way I've never seen anyone else get stressed. If she were a hermit and never had to interact with anybody else, this source of stress would still be there. Independent of people, nature still does unexpected and surprising things that have to be coped with. The tempurature suddenly drops. It suddenly rises. It's hailing. There is a hurricane. The tree fell over and crushed something important. Etc. Take away all the people and there is still the stress of the unexpected.

So, yeh, NTs are less stressed in general. I am NT and my stress level is far lower than hers. I have never actually met a person as stressed out. Most of my stress at current comes from my futile attempts to bring down her stress. But mine is situational, like you said. And I have social coping mechanisms not available to her.

There are NT people in situations of nearly unimaginable stress. I think being in a North Korean prison would be an example of that. Or being in a war zone. But when you are NT, these and other intense stressors can be helped by connecting with other people. When you have autism, that whole coping mechanism is not only unavailable, it is a source of stress in itself. There was another thread called "Lonely, but peopled out". That about sums it up. "Lonely" is a severe stress for NT people (which is why solitary confinement counts as such a horror). "...but peopled out" is rarely a stress for NT people. So when you have AS these two types of stress pile on top of each other in a way that I can't really wrap my head around, no matter how many of these threads I read. But when NT peoples' coping mechanism for stress is in iteself a form of stress if you have AS, the levels overall of stress must be higher.

Hear! Hear! I second those emotions... I have a panic attack if someone rings my doorbell.



Well, the fact that you live with your parents takes a lot of stress out of your life - you're not responsible for paying bills and having enough to eat and that, my friend, all depends on your ability to socialize - if you can't fit in at work, yoah fiyuuuhd, and in that instant your whole world can fall apart. When you suck at fitting in socially, that sword hangs over your head every minute of every day, especially during the eight hours or more you are forced to spend at work, pretending you like, care about and enjoy the company of people you can't wait to get away from. Realistically, you could die from a social mistake if it causes you to end up homeless, or you accidentally piss off a violent felon because you didn't realize you were looking at him funny. Enjoy Mom and Dad's place while you can - it's a freaking jungle out there...