Who worries about weight, calories, etc.

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I have a girlfriend who is CONSTANTLY worrying about her weight and she is NOT even fat.

She became anorexic once last year due to the fact she lost weight and did exactly the same thing like she did last year and lost so much weight.

- She counts calories
- She worries about her weight
- She thinks that I will call her fat and call her ugly
- She tries to eat practically nothing

I only noticed this a couple of days ago that she is repeating the exact same things she did last year and I've tried reassuring her, tried proving to her that she doesn't need to worry but this time, it is not working and I don't want her to be hospitalized and everything and I don't want her to suffer again like she did last time.

Everyone of my mates even tried previously but failed to succeed....

She sent me this text the other day.

If anyone is confused with what topic I'm on about, I'm wondering who cares about their body image and weight and at the same time, I'm also asking for help.


Thanks.
- superboyian.

I don't really worry about that stuff.

I care a lot. I'm vegan nutritionist with OCD. So it's obvious

i obsess over it. I keep spreadsheets of my calories and stuff. Now I get of track sometimes, and I am not as bad as I used to be, but even though I am at a perfectly acceptable weight (for doctors at least) now, I cant accept it and want to lose 15 lbs. If I stay around 125 I dont obsess as much, but I still weight every day to make sure I keep it off. My health issues made me gain this weight in the past 2 years (im 142 at 5 ft '7in). Well it is 17 lbs to be exact. If I were 130 it would be more acceptable for me, but I know how I am so I would go for that last 5 lbs.

Well I care about what I eat, but I don't really keep track of the exact amount. It's the general eating and exercise habits that count, not how the numbers add up on any particular day. I eat vegetables more than I eat meat, and don't eat food-like imitations. It works for me, even without obsessing about any particular nutrient.

Fun fact: Michael Phelps consumes food with a value of over 10,000 calories a day.

I do, but I didn't use to. Right now I'm taking medicine(s) that have made me gain weight and I'm larger than I've ever been, that's why it's bothersome. But before all this I didn't worry about weight hardly at all.

It's really not uncommon for girls to worry about weight. I've had more than one friend who weighs under 100lbs and thinks they're "fat." I guess there is just more and more pressure for girls to be good-looking, and skinniness is part of being good-looking in this day and age.

Sometimes when girls or women are anorexic, it is really a slow form of suicide, Ian. I would pay attention to your friend's other obsessions or discussions as well. She probably has BDD, Body Dismorphic Disorder ,or something like that, which makes her see herself as bigger than she really is. I used to be really bad about this, and I still tend to think I wont fit through tighter spaces because I am too big, when I have plenty of room (that is how I know that I still have a little bit of this problem).

I don't currently own any scales and don't feel compelled to buy any, so I guess it's not much of a concern for me. I do try to eat well and get enough exercise, though. I've grown up being told by my mother (and other people's mothers) that I'm too skinny, so I've never stressed over weight.

It kind of breaks my heart to read about girls like the one described in the OP, especially when more and more people these days are happy to admit that a person doesn't have to be skinny to be attractive. The pressure they feel is really undeserved.

There's a profound difference between worrying about one's weight in staying at a healthy weight, and anorexia.

I'm in my 50's, going through menopause, and can no longer eat whatever I want because it'll burn off.

I'm up 15# from my healthy weight of 135, I've put those 15# on in the last 10 years, 5# in the last year alone, and before I officially join the massive majority, I'd like to take a few of those pounds off. In other words, I'm seeing a trend towards overweight and I'm just not going there. So I've started watching what I eat, making the healthier choices, and passing up the junk food and desserts more often.

Anorexia, on the other hand, is a life threatening disorder, and you are RIGHT to be concerned about your girlfriend. It takes a serious commitment on her part to being healthy, and it may require hospitalization, both medical and psych. It is indeed slow suicide, and intervention may be necessary.

If I were you, I'd do more research into anorexia, it's treatment, and how to best support recovery. She's not just concerned about her weight, she's trying to erase herself.

No, no, no.

Ian, I'm sorry your girlfriend is going through this. The problem isn't her weight, it's that openly calling other girls fat -- especially if they are thinner than the girls doing the name-calling -- is the favorite method of girl-to-girl bullying and the guys who are inclined to bullying are starting to pick up on it, too, as an acceptable way to target girls. My daughter -- who went through high school eating no more than a Slimfast shake and an apple per day -- was called fat constantly by girls with bellies that hung over their jeans. It lasted until she realized that it had nothing whatsoever to do with her weight and that it didn't matter how thin she got, to those calling the names she will always be "fat." All it meant was that they didn't like her and were the kind of crass, meanspirited people who wanted to make her feel bad if they could. Of course, now she's screwed up her metabolism so badly that she only has to look at food and gain weight, poor thing.

I keep track of saturated fat and avoid trans fat whenever possible, and I also seek out high protein foods, such as soy-based meat substitutes. I try to keep my saturated fat intake somewhere near the recommended daily allowance of 20 grams per day. The saturated fat guideline is surprisingly easy to exceed. I also have an interest in knowing approximately how many calories I am burning through exercise. The elliptical machines I use say that I burn about 700-850 Calories per hour, depending on how hard I push myself, so I'm probably burning an average of about 500 Calories per day above baseline metabolic rate. I do this to maintain a constant body weight and to maintain my capabilities. If I didn't do this, I would put on about 50 pounds per year, as a surplus of 10 Calories per day will add about 1 pound per year.

Not worrying about it is the quickest way to become obese. I don't think you have to go to the extremes of Bulimia or Anorexia, but I know from experience that once you put the weight on, getting it off is a nightmare pain in the @ss. Much easier to do your crunches and treadmilling every day and keep an eye on your carb intake than to starve off 40 pounds of lard. I've done both, and maintaining the exercise routine is much easier.

As much whining as I see here about guys not being able to get girls, I'd think things like this would be a very high priority.

This is true- when I was in HS a kid called me "Orca" all the time and his friends joined in and it became a favorite pass-time. I was 115 lbs- at 5 foot 7. I got down to 104 because of this and other people bullying me so I thought I would get really skinny and maybe I would be more acceptable to all. It is really sad. Now I still have that little demon eating away at my self esteem at age 37. It is a terrible way to live, especially on top of all the other problems I have. Ironically, that kid became a crack addict.

I almost beat an ass one day when a little girl called my daughter fat. She is built like me, so I knew she wouldn't keep that pot belly that little girls can get before they learn good posture and have that prepubescent growth spurt. She was 8 and wanted to diet. I bet her a large sum of money that by the time she was a teenager her belly would be gone with no dieting. I won- she is 11 and had a growth spurt last year that stretched it all out. I am not going to have her go through what I went through. I told that little girl off and sent her home for bullying my daughter.

I used to, but I'm at a fairly static weight now. So I can let it go, thankfully.

I do worry about my weight, to some extent. I have a healthy diet and I exercise, because I want to maintain my current weight.

I do worry about my weight in a way because I was on a medication that made me gain a lot of it, and there's a family history of type 2 diabetes which could become an issue if I don't do anything. Also, both of my parents take meds to lower their cholesterol, but I would like to avoid that for as long as I can, and eating healthy and exercising will help me to keep my cholesterol numbers in the normal range, and losing excess weight will help with that as well.