Asperger's and Sarcasm

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My brother can be a rather cynical and sarcastic person and that is the only thing I don't like about him. Mother and I were discussing that this evening and I asked her if people with Asperger's had trouble dealing with sarcasm.

I feel most comfortable being around perpetually happy people!

I usually don't "get" sarcasm when it comes from someone I don't know very well. I guess it's because I can't read their mood easily. I do enjoy a bit of sarcasm with people I know, although sometimes they even catch me off guard.
I see myself as a perpetually happy person because I don't see a purpose in being otherwise. I have had times of sadness but I don't allow myself to drown in it. I think that happiness is a mindset and not something that you find or something that happens to you.

I have a hard time recognizing sarcasam, and at the same time, I've come across as being sarcastic when I didn't mean to be.

Once I got in trouble at work becasue I came across as being sarcastic when I wasn't trying to be.

Other times I've caused problems with other people because I've come across as being sarcastic when I wasn't trying to be.

Sarcasm? Hah! I don't know the meaning of the word.

In my family we are extreamly sarcastic. I get their sarcasm 98% of the time, but sometimes it goes right over my head (not litarary)

I find too much sarcasm a waste of time, and it gets emotion heated. OH, I BET IT IS!?! In some doses it might be funny, although not very funny to me compared to other forms and I tend to gloss right by it unless it's featured on a television show like Dead Like Me -- where I know the events within that microverse will not be negatively impacting me anytime soon.

I usually can catch sarcasicm 90% of the time. I think I've used it without realizing it.

Hilary,

You took the words right out of my mouth - I have the same problem with *my* brother - he's quite sarcastic and cynical, and it always urks me. I can catch *his* sarcasm about 60-75% of the time because I'm close to him, but with other people, I miss the sarcasm about 90% of the time, because I *do* tend to take most things literally as is part of Aspergers.



I agree with you, monastic, as I really don't like being unhappy, and I find that if I am perpetually happy and smiling, it helps keep the people I interact with happy as well. I don't like to engage in sarcastic humor, and I don't like receiving it either, because it's almost like lying - speaking false things even though you mean the exact opposite.

I wish people would understand the same thing about swearing - for me it is a form of speaking that is deragatory as well as being very imprecise - for me, it's easier to fully communicate my feelings across using more precise language that is respectful of the other person.

Thanks for posting this topic, hilarythebaker, and I look forward to seeing other people's reactions.

mentalman

Hey nethier do I

I can actually be rather sarcastic myself, I understand sarcasm, my problem is identifying it when other people are using it. They often don't get it when I use it, either, though.

I've been through quite a few misunderstandings and small arguments over having taken someone's sarcastic remark literally, as an insult toward myself.

Usually, if I know a person well, I am able to logically determine if they are being sarcastic, by asking myself "Would this person actually say something like that and mean it?" Obviously, this doesn't work for people I've just met, or don't know very well, so it can sometimes get in the way of conversation. People tend to joke with eachother as a way of expressing trust and comeraderie, but if you don't get the jokes or take them too seriously, then it seems like you are either being overreactive, or you have no sense of humor, and people don't generally like that. I think it probably makes them feel bad about themselves, as well.

I seem very sarcastic but I think its because its the only delibrate humour I can do. I usually catch other people's sarcasm but sometimes I cant tell if they are being sarcastic or not if they dont change their tone of voice or expression.

I have trouble understanding sarcasm from anyone other than my best friend and my bf. I also end up saying "I was being sarcastic" immediately after I use any sarcasm, because everyone thinks I'm serious.

My son is young, and he does not understand humor at all,
and he is very literal thinking so for that I can say that it would take some time and for me to practice/teach him the best I can for him to even try to understand sarcasm.

when people are laughing- he thinks that they are laughing at him, this is very hard for him to understand that they are laughing because they think something is funny.
Michele

I'm often very dead-pan. However the stuff I say is usually so ridiculous that people get confused, because I couldn't possibly mean something like that, yet I look so serious... I like to get people confused like that.

I think that if the stuff you say is sufficiently stupid, then people should realise that you aren't being serious, and they'll get the joke. That's what usually works for me anyway.
Its when you say something that could be taken as a legitimate answer that people won't realise you are being sarcastic. Of course you can always change the intonation to sound more sarcastic, but I don't like doing that as I think it can make you sound nastier then you intended.
I'm not really a nasty person, and while I like to say controversial things, I don't actually want to offend or upset people. I say things to make people think differently than the accepted norm, from a different angle- not to offend them.

I like some sarcastic characters on a TV show -- it becomes easier to learn from that context without feeling threatened if someone in real life is poking you with verbal insults. One of my faves is Ellen Muth portraying George Lass on the show Dead Like Me. She's awesome, super deadpan!

Unless they change their tone, I won't catch it. Dispite this I sometimes say sarcastic things myself.