doesn't know how to play with toys (is this a common thing)

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hi all,
doesn't know how to play with toys (is this a common thing for youngists with autism?
thanks cazzie

Would say it is normal, but wouldn't call it not knowing how to play with toy, more like unintended way to play with them, doing something not intended with a toy in no way mean we are not having fun with it. Through I admit should try to speak with the kid who usage happen to cause damage, but if it doesn't let them have fun their own way, imagination is only restricted by one person own mind.

My son was like that. I had to teach him everything. I taught him how to play correctly, and also taught him how to be creative and use different toys for different things. He learned by rote, but after time and experience he learned how to play like others or as intended and how to be imaginative, but he did have to be taught.

He still controls everyone though.

i heard me mum say that she had to teach me how to do things in the right way!!

T prefers real stuff.

I used to worry that he wasn't playing imaginary games with figures, but now I don't.

He plays, some things are typical and some things aren't.

I noticed that unless they are doing something like racing or on playground equipment or things like that, he and girls
just don't connect. Playdates don't go that well with girls, even though the likes having them over. They have a tendency
to expect more interactive pretend talky type play. NT girls, anyway.

But then again, the last playdate we had (with an AS boy from class) T initiated playing school. And they took turns being the teacher.

He's fine if he has something to copy, something he likes.

In what ways was he 'playing incorrectly' before you modified his behavior?

I figure that as long as nothing the child does is a safety hazard than whatever is fine. As long as the toys aren't being choked on, stuck in a light socket, put in a microwave oven or flushed down the toilet, just let things be.

I think that kids should be free to play with their toys, however they wish.

ditto willard's question

the "inappropriate play" is a very common trait with autistic children. i prefer to see it as "playing in ways not intended" =)

my 4 yr old aspie has always used objects in different ways than intended. overall his play has more to do with the shape and structure of things than their intended use. while he has a huge supply of lincoln logs and tinker toys that he never touches, he commonly builds things out of his geotrax train tracks. an hour ago he was pouring me coffee out of his coffee pot he build out of elevated track supports. i find his play to be very inventive and imaginative. anyone can pour tea out of a play teapot, but it takes a real imagination to pour it out of a teapot you built yourself out of track supports!

weve never tried to interfere in his play, as long as its safe and not destructive. over the last 18 months hes really grown and developed in his play. he plays more as intended with toys, shows a lot of spontaneous pretend and imitative play. i think this past year in preschool and exposure to a lot of other children in close quarters has really helped this, as well as having a brother 2 years older that he always plays with. i believe a lot of autistics will develop more in their play as they grow, given time and the unfettered ability to play as they choose.

it does strike me as odd that we look at kids who play with toys in unique and non-intended ways, then try to say these same children lack imaginative play. perhaps its just that by looking at the shapes and patterns of objects, they see or imagine things we cant.

Let me rephrase. Play as the toy is intended to be played with, show him how it works, that kind of thing. "Correctly" was the wrong word. Sorry.

Say I have lego's for example. They are typically used, and designed for building with so I would show him how they go together to make a house or something. Then I would be playing with another toy, like playdough for example. Then I would show him ways to use the lego's with the playdough. You can use them as arms sticking out of the side of a ball of playdough and make little people, or maybe you can make a playdough mountain with trees or something, using the lego's as trees or rocks, and then take a car and drive over the mountain like daddy does when we drive off road. Things like that. I didn't necessarily do this to modify the behavior because I don't really care how he plays, as long as he enjoys himself, but I wanted him to be more flexible and teach him that you don't have to do the same thing every time, and to help him think of creative ways to do different things with different toys, and more importantly, feel comfortable doing it.

I think my goal was not so much to teach him to play "properly" but to be more flexible in general, and to learn that it's OK to change things up a little without being "wrong".

as a social skill, as this is the first chance a child has to learn about others' perspectives. Don't overdo teaching pretend play as if it's the only way to play, but it's a good skill to teach as children can build upon pretend play into creative writing and perspective taking later. People with ASDs tend to be linear thinkers and teaching pretend play can teach them that alternatives are available, different ways of thinking or doing.

Last edited by Decepticon on 23 Jun 2010, 2:22 am, edited 1 time in total.

YES!

I was always at a loss as to what to do with my barbies, my brother's matchbox cars, or anything. I would usually dress my barbies, then arrange them in a certain order. Same with my kitchen toy, pots, pans, teacups, that type of thing. I would arrange them, and once I did that, I had no clue what to do. My brother's cars, I more or less learned to play properly because he told me how, and he'd show me. He was always more or less good at sharing with me or anyone else. I never was, especially if I saw someone else was disrupting the perfect order I had arranged my toys in.

I would also give my toys 'personalities', and sometimes arrange them by that, like from lazy to angry. I know it's weird, but...well, I don't know where I used to come up with that stuff. I'm not quite sure how I could tell.

I played totally wrong with every toy I owned that had anything to do with "pretend"
I hated when my cousin brought down his action figures.... They irritated the heck out of me. Though I could think of things to do with them... (which he wouldn't go for) like using them as a substitute for the ball in a good game of baseball.

Got my first computer... it wasn't the games I liked. It was the programming of it that i most liked.

A lot of my childhood was spent believing I had to do everything the proper way though... So, i had very few toys that I actually did play with, and didn't ask for many either. I had a few that I could play with the proper way, and still enjoy. Lego was one. Things i could build with.

In retrospect looking at childhood, I didn't lack any imagination. But I had to be able to use my imagination to create something real, or i wasn't interested in it beyond keeping it in my head... Acting something out just didn't quite work for me. The toy soldier's gun didn't go "bang" so why would I say "bang"? But the lego dig go together to make a house or something else useful. I don't think I ever played with the things I made with it. I simply enjoyed the making of it. Moving a lego man in and out of a house didn't do much for me. I can't remember much to be honest. but I do think i let wheeled things like cars roll down things... but I didn't push them around saying "vroom vroom" I watched them roll down boards or the backs of chairs or whatever else i had. They did roll down on their own... they didn't make sounds, and they didn't move across a level floor.

All in all it's not imagination that changes the way aspies play, it's I think better stated as "a different interpretation of imagination" that changes an aspies play.

I don't know how much my experiences hold true to other aspies though, because the strong need for propriety was so dominant in my early childhood, the conflict it had with who I was biases anything I can relate.

As a kid, when my sisters were playing with their Barbie dolls, acting out various scenes and parties and whatnot, I was giving my Barbie haircuts with scissors, piercing her ears with sewing needles, and making clothing for her out of scraps of fabric. I later tired of that (Barbie dolls only have so much hair on them) and turned my attention to painting pennies various interesting colors with nail polish.