Enviroment Vs. Asperger's

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When it was first suggested to me that I may have Asperger's, I of course began to research it. I watched several of the youtube videos of people with Asperger's explaining what it is like and their childhood. Some of these people I was able to relate to. However I have had a great interest in Feral Children and, for some reason, I related to them as well.

As a child I was mostly neglected being raised by dogs and TV, which of course gave me poor social skills to begin with, whether or not I had Asperger's or not. Plus my family was never big on displaying emotions or communicating how someone feels, whether happy or sad, good times or bad. So displaying emotions, and even experience with other peoples emotions was limited as a child.

So of course determining whether or not I have Asperger's as opposed to environmental development problems.

Of course coming here and reading everyones stories, and getting a better understanding of "stimming" and the "autistic world" and everything else that is connected to Asperger's has convinced me that I do have Asperger's.

Now I am wondering how big of a home life/ environment had an impact on you?

If you have further questions for me, feel free to PM me. I don't always get a chance to check my email to see the messages.

Ah interesting topic.

It took 36 years for the AS dx to come to light for me. Before that I was dx with all sorts of mental illnesses and suffered for it. My childhood was very strange. Sometimes violent. My parents are quite eccentric, we had money, I went to private Catholic schools all my school life. My father was emotionally inept, sometimes very critical, but caring. My mother was a perfectionist, well-bred, well-groomed and successful, but her discipline went over the line occasionally.

I was terrified of both of them for different reasons.

I was taught grooming, social skills, etiquette, table manners and the correct use of cutlery and how to eat soup properly . I was taught how to dress, elocution and diplomatic discourse. So, good and bad things in my childhood.

As much as my parents took away, they also gave back. It is for these reasons that no-one ever thought to look at what I couldn't say over 36 torturous years, but my behaviour, which was extreme, was taken in to account. It was by the shrewd intelligence of my recent psychologist that AS was discovered. She was the first person to ask me if Autism was in my family. Surprised, I said yes, my cousin had Kanners Syndrome and 2 of my fathers cousins have AS. The shining light of epiphany for her. I am sure it went towards confirming her suspicions.

So, after 20 years of hospital, therapy and meds, I had grown and matured, yet some fundamental issues still remained. What were they? I had healed from my parents hurt inflicted upon me (we are actually all good friends now). I was in a good relationship with a wonderful man. My 15 year old son was well adjusted despite what he had to go through with me. So why still so many issues in the absence of true and enduring mental illness? And my psych took 2 years to put it all in to place. And I rallied against that AS dx, but the evidence that poured forth like a geyser was too logical to be ignored.

In truth, AS and environment exist in the same realm. They are not mutually exclusive, as one can effect the other most monumentally. Only you know how much is nature and how much is nuture.

By the way, despite the fact that I had seriously considered joining the convent to do a Bachelor of Theology, I am most appreciative of your avatar. I had a good, dark laugh at that, although I do not know if Great White Sharks(species?) exist in the Sea of Gallillee to eat unsuspecting messiahs

Take care and keep talking,

Mics

Thanks. After discovering my AS, I realized that my father most likely has it as well. Which helps explain, in part, the way I was raised. And after discussing this with my mother, she says that his father, my grandfather, most likely had it as well.

Looking back I still can't decide if the way I was raised was better for me or not. From watching TV I was, literally, able to learn how to read peoples body language and facial expressions. Since they are over-exaggerated on TV, I was able to look for the more down played versions in reallife. Of course, I still get the more subtle ones completely wrong or just miss them all together.

So glad to read this here! Me too! Me too!

It's also nice to see, Michhsta, that you have reconciled the good and bad from your childhood. I had a similar upbringing and could really benefit from acknowledging the gifts I was given with regard to social skills. Thank you for that reminder.

And SteamPowerDev, I definitely learned how to be a little actress when I was growing up from television and movies. My parents would make fun of me for being so "dramatic", but it was either that or be completely shut down and I didn't learn how to be more subtle about it until I took up drama in high school. Granted, I was terrified to even be on stage and never won more than the requisite "townsperson" parts because I was never very good, but it was definitely good practice for my "facade" of normalcy.

I'm another who's facing the ASD vs Environment issue. I also had a rather upsetting childhood and teasing out what aspect caused what trait has been hard. Talking about it with my Mum has been helpful to a degree but I can never ignore the knowledge that abuse did occur, that there was violence and it may have either caused or compounded my traits.

However, I still think that there are certain traits I have [i.e. interpersonal issues] which have remained long after I've healed from the abuse, so perhaps that is the ASD talking.

When researching ASD, I've often wondered if people from my dad's side of the family had it as well. Not that I'm qualified to diagnose anyone but there seems to some ASD-like traits floating around that side of the family. Perhaps there are some undiagnosed ASDers on that side, who knows. One of my cousins is going in for some sessions with a psychologist so that might be interesting.