The word "please" and it's interpretation

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The word "please" if frequently thrown around, and used pretty much after any request. "Please" is heard everywhere, not just directly out of someone's mouth in dialogue, but on signs, recorded announcements, among the many places. For example, the audiable message on the metro-rail states "Please step away from the doors as they are closing". A sign may say "Please turn out the lights when leaving"...of course, there are thousands of examples

To me, it is sort of a way to sugar-coat something, and make it appear more polite, but To me, it seems to take the urgency out of the message that is being said is being defused by using this work. The term "Please" to me basically says "It would be really nice and polite if you went the extra mile and did this, but you really don't, it's just impolite not to" For example, a sign in front of a building may read "Please check in at the security desk before entering the building" To me, that means that I can check into the security desk if I feel like it, but I don't need to, it would just be a little rude if I didn't. Of course, if I just walked right in, a guard would quickly be fussing at me for not checking in. Removing the "Please" seems to me like it would hammer the message home, and make it seem more important. Stating the same term "Check in at the security desk before entering the building" seems to have quite a bit more authority and sound more important to me. In that case, I would be more inclined to check in at the security desk!

How do you interpret the term?

i think please is a good thing to say i think it is rude if it isnt said unless it actually IS an urgest request ie Mind out! that car is comin near!! you would want oh please do mind that car for it is going to hit you.... thered be so sense of urgency...
but in alloter others cases i think please is a good thing to use and go by

I agree that "please" does have a sort of non-required feel about it. After all, it is a question, not a command, and that leaves it open to be ignored. However, it is one of those unwritten rules in society that people use to make commands seem less demanding, and if you ignore it or refuse to use it, you leave yourself wide open to being considered rude. (C.S. Lewis kind of talks about that in Mere Christianity.)

I've learned that despite its almost farcical addition at the end of requests, I ought to just do it or risk getting in trouble...at least at work.

Trivia: The modern usage of "Please" as a single word originated as a quicker way to say:

"If it pleases you, turn out the lights when leaving." or
"Turn out the lights when leaving, as it pleases you."

Now it is shortened to just:

"Please turn out the lights when leaving."

"Please" indicates that you are not attempting to command the person to do what you say, as commanding a person who you have no right to command can be offensive.

I never truly understood the real meaning behind why contemporary society has an obsession with words such as 'please,' 'thank you,' etc... It's similar to how I feel about so-called manners, as well ... like, why should we set the table with a fork, knife and spoon in just the right positions. None of this really makes sense to me, though it does to contemporary society. I guess in terms of saying 'please' or 'thank you,' there's some aspect of it that is polite, but then again ... things like table manners? Those make absolutely no sense at all.

- Ray M -

Aeturnus -- like how putting your elbows on the table is seen as bad table manners for no real reason?

Manners are pretty much the reason for the use of the word "please". Using the word "please" essentially shows respect and courtesy.

Which is why I personally would rather have "please" used in notices such as those quoted above, precisely because it is less authoritarian.

And when you go to another country and use another language there, the word for "please" is one of the words you must learn, even if you learn no more of the language. Such as "s'il vous plaît" in French, "por favor" in Spanish, etc.

When reding you post at first i thought exactally as you about the use of the word, but i also saw it in the example of the train doors shutting " please " is entirely the wrong word for that purpose.

jammie

Hi all, this is my first post - glad I found this place!

My son is an Aspie, and I'm still learning my way around. But in my reading about Aspergers, one thing stood out - that "routine" and "consistency" are important. I think you know what I mean?

Well, etiquette, please/thank-you/elbows off the table - all of that serves the same purpose for the rest of the world. Aspies aren't the only ones who take comfort in knowing what to expect.

Think of these kinds of customs as a way to know, no matter where you go, or what new situation you find yourself in, you can fall back on etiquette. Firm handshake, smile, look 'em in the eye, ask "how are you" ... all that stuff - the reason that society has developed these rituals is so we have a common "operating system" to borrow a computer phrase.

And if you're a techie, you know that you have to be compatible with the OS in order to get your work done.

Thanks for listening, hope this helps.

Scott

WHY THE ELBOWS OFF THE TABLE??? what is the purpose of this?

i don't know either lol