ADHD screening

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I wish they would not do those things early in the morning... and they expect me to behave normal... ie how I'd plan to behave.

I would have taken it quite seriously, because I been waited 2 years to get tested, and everything is so far behind that they need to make a screening to try to disallow people to take the actual test. So it is important I "pass" it.

The psych started out asking why I wanted to come. I was truthful and said my doc sent me and I never really expected to have ADHD. She was totally thrown off by that comment. I was expected to say I feel so different and already had made a full analysis of myself. I have realized the last few years I have a lot of ADD traits.

Still it is just basic truth. Then I continue saying I have no real idea what ADHD means, I say I just have a general idea. I guess it gets her further distracted. I have no idea why I did this, I do know ADHD quite well, but her 1st reaction made me totally out of sync with what I thought I'd say. I basically started to act like I didn't care much, and some questions she asked I had no good answer to. Normally I would be very verbal and make a huge effort.

My own behavior made me kind of surprised. I've done similar things in the past, but common it is not. I never really analyzed it and I don't understand it. It sort of goes against my nature, or what I feel is my nature right now.

I think I made up for this on the written half. I wish I could have spent more focus on some of the questions which I just sort of checkmarked without really knowing what is real, but most I feel I was completely accurate about.

She says she knows I also have Asperger's, and somehow says she is not an expert on it. She says people with Aspeger's have lacking eye contact (like it is one of the major things) and surprisingly she says I have normal eye contact. I remember seeing a girl with Asperger's that looked down into the table the whole time she was talking and even made me feel strange about it. So I wondered if I act like that and I do an effort to make eye contact, even if I feel I rarely made totally real eye contact, and it is just brief, then I look everywhere else. I make a point of looking at the person hastily as we shake hands. But overall I feel I don't do eye contact, and I'm perceived as normal in that sense.

Bit of a confusing day for little me.

I was diagnosed with adhd when I was 5. I was put into special education classes from 1st to 10th grade because of it which was a living hell that i kept begging the teachers throught my school years. My psychologist said he did not see any signs of the adhd. I was pretty much cheated out of a proper education by a bad diagnosis. Being in those classes gave people I was less than them giving them the right to pick o me I guess. My psychologist thinks they mistook my memory problems with a learning disability.

Wow, sucky.

Luckily I'm way too old for school. Don't miss it one bit.