Celoneth wrote:
I was happy that I finally knew what was wrong with me. I was happy that I wasn't the only person on the planet that felt the way I did and that I wasn't broken or defective. Also, it's become one of my major interests so I was happy to have something new to research and obsess over. I wasn't happy that it was something permanent and had been affecting my life in a lot of ways I never realised.
^This^
Dumbass, idiot, lout, freak, jerk, weirdo, oddball, schmuck, lazy, senseless, stubborn, out-of-touch, emotionally ret*d, unfeeling, callous, selfish, whiny, useless, weak, standoffish, shy, socially inept, snob, elitist, dreamer, brain damaged, different, procrastinator, nut, eccentric, eclectic, crackpot, scary, overgrown child, stupid, head-in-the-clouds, sh*t fer brains, strange, clumsy, loon, user, rebel, problem child, odd-man-out, goofball, douchebag, card, character, oaf, throwback, insubordinate, uncooperative, @ssh*le..
Just a few of the terms used to describe me over the course of my life by people I've known, including my parents, many of my teachers and almost all of my employers to name a few, and not one of them was smiling when they said it.
After all that, to realize that what they were all describing was not
me - it was
their reaction to my Autism - was a tremendous and cathartic relief. Not happy that I had Autism, but happy to discover that my differences from the rest of the world HAD A NAME AND A CAUSE, and others were having these problems, too.