How many girls are there on here with AS? And...

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How have you noticed your experiences differing from some of the guys?

I'm a girl (woman? dunno. Hate that word!) with AS and I've been told a few times that there can be differences in how it manifests. I'm fundamentally creative, which is supposed to be non-Aspie, but I read something which suggested girls with AS can be more creative than boys with AS.

I'd be interested to know if any other female Aspies (presuming there must be!) have any experiences to share on these kinds of things - I'm trying to get an accurate picture of the differences, if any!

Apple

I've noticed such things as well. I actually find myself questioning my 'aspie'ness from time to time, mostly because I don't seem to be as extreme (for lack of a better word) as some of the stories I've heard about. But I'll be going for a dx soon, so we'll see.

I have friends (a few close ones who accept me for who I am), I paint and draw, I think I'm a good mom (not taking away anything from other aspie parents), I have a good career, and generally get by relatively well on a daily basis.

I've read that they believe women go underdiagnosed, because some of them do seem to have an easier time dealing with some of the harder parts of having AS. I wonder if, in a way, being female balances out the extreme male brain. I don't follow fashion or trends, but I wear clothes that look good on me. I don't like gossip or small talk, but I can have many a conversation that doesn't ultimately lead to one of my obsessions. Instead of tuning out on conference calls (I have a hard time following meetings), my creative side kicks in and I draw very detailed pictures in order to stay focused.

Also - I've never had difficulty with feeling empathy for someone else. There may be people that I believe don't deserve empathy - but for those who do, I feel it. I may not be able to tell when someone is back stabbing me, or I may be the last to get a joke, but I can always tell when someone isn't feeling quite well.

Any others?

I don't seem to have any problems with empathy either.
(although I often tend to force my opinions on others)
I can read body language most of the time, although I have problems with eye contact and facial expressions.
Irony comes relatively easy for me, howerver (although I am often told to be sarcastic myself) I often let sarcasm fly right past me.
I also seem to be rather crative, but I seem to handle analytical subjects far better. My creativity often kicks in when writing.
I seem to have the ability to create new words and phrases that contribute a lot to my text.
My special intrests have been more directed towards people than objects (although this has changed over the years.
I now have a passion for neuro-psychatry and music)
I am rather clumsy (drop stuff a lot, have a slight difficulty using cultry, show poor ball skills, poor running skills,
used to stumble and trip alot when I was a child and so on), although I play the drums. (hmm)

Another female here. I feel I show my AS symptoms in a different way than most males. For example, my interest normally involve a particular person (actor, singer, artist...) rather than an "impersonal" subject, and I think I've got a more vivid imagination. But apart from that, I'm not so different from males with AS.

I think i am noticably weird because i don't talk much for a woman! not wishing to be sexist about it but people do find it strange that i don't talk much.
I feel emotions (my own and others') all too deeply at times. right now i am crying my eyes out because i don't know how to tell my parents about as.
I have never cared about clothes or fashion, hate clothes shopping.
Always felt more comfortable talking to boys than girls at school.
Rarely wear make up. It's a chore.

im a female and for the most part on this forum i can relate to most of the things that people say about being an aspie.
i was only just recently diagnosed at 21
i do have alot of problems with empathy and puttin myself in somebody elses position, biut this has improved over the years... 2 examples of this is at work. ive made a really good friend now at work. im not sure but i think the woman i made friends with might be an aspie aswell- or at least she displays some of the characteristics similer to me.
she was telling me all about how her husband had hit her after gettin drunk... she came in crying. i only thought about what i should have done after she left. i stood there with my arms pinned by my side and said im not sure what to say really. but i know if som1 did that to me theyd be out of the door. after wards i thought i should maybe have hugged her. but im not great with psysical contact so i dont lnow whehter i should have or not.

another is of my colleague who lives away from home.. i offered to swap my shifts so he could have enough time to go home on his day off and appreciate it. i would never thought about this a year ago i would have just thought about myself first.


i do manage most of the time to keep my obsession out of conversation.. DRUMS. unless it is about playing them which i do talk about quite alot. but i dont tend to tell everybody that i kiss them and cuddle them.. just like some people. and people on this forum because they tend not to think im wierd!!

i can talk forever aswell andi get annoyed ifsomebody interrupts me
i cannot tell facial expressions much.. a couple i can do but none else. so i cannot tell if somebody is gettin bored with what i say. i just ask them to make it obvious if they are getting bored.
im not good with ball skills and telling distance. my co ordination has improved with my drumming but music is my forte along with art
i play several musical instuments and i enjoy painting and drawing

i have a very inventice and logical head. i can invent things out of other things asnd make things work better. im good with rotational and mirror symmetry - i can read upside down and i can write backwards, with letters all backwards aswell, as fast as i can write forwards.
alos can write with either hand

my mum says my personal hygiene is not up to scratch.
it used to be worse though. i could leave my hair several days without washing it and i didnt used to shave my armpits or legs - i still dont shave my legs but the hair is so fine and fair that i dont think i need to
my bedroom has never really stayed tidy.. i get asked to tiday my room 2 times a week but thing send up in th same palce they were,... i put my clothes onto a chair but sometimes they fall to the floor.
one thing i always did make sure i did is brush my teeth once a day which i still do. i rember my dentist showing me pictures of rotted teeth when i was little and those pictures have stayed in my head the whole time.

im also a walking telephone book
people need only to say a telephone number one time to me and i rmember it and who / company to which it belongs.. i dont even need to write them down they are all in my head. im 21 now and i still have telephone numbers of friends i used to have in 6th grade whom i havent seen since!- in my head!

Aspies can be creative.

There are aspie musicians, poets, actors, visual artists, novelists as well as scientists, engineers, computer programmers, doctors. All these things are intensely creative activities.

(start completely unresearched theory)

I think the main difference is that little girls are taught a lot more rules about emotional communication and corrected more than boys if they're not getting it right.

It is more acceptable for boys to have temper tantrums than girls, and for boys to hit each other or their siblings - out of frustration. It is more acceptable for boys to set the rules and take the role of leader. And it is more acceptable for boys (or men) to be eccentric, insenstive, aloof, arrogant (this is usually perceived not actual), angry, agressive, intolerant etc. Aspie type professions tend to be male dominated too - it takes a strong woman to put up with all the s**t from all male co-workers (or just tune it out) and stick with it, and then your clients will still think that the junior bloke standing next to you is the expert not you. Sigh.

I think this is why I fell into feminism like a duck to water - what ever boys can be I wanted too.

I suspect there are just as many aspie women out there as aspie boys but they are harder to diagnose or are frequently misdiagnosed - or maybe a strong dose of testosterone and male strength - makes boys harder to handle - so parents more often seek help for boys.

It is also more acceptable for girls to be silent and withdrawn so parents may not investigate what is going on there. It is also more acceptable for girls to be depressed - so girls may get a partial diagnosis of depression - without the more complete diagnosis of aspergers. It is more acceptable for women to be miserable so long as they do their duty to their family. And I suspect little girls learn to fake the right emotions very early. You get a lot of women who fake being happy - not that this trick is limited to aspie women. I think that's why "desperate housewives" is so popular.

(end completely unresearched theory)

I got an informal diagnosis after regular visits with a psychologist because I was depressed and I was procrastinating too much and I wanted to stop.

As for the empathy and emotional thing - I think Aspies are very empathatic and emotional. If I see someone else cry or get sick - I feel that too. And I am very easily upset myself, and I cry when I'm angry or frustrated (I think that's a hang over from girls not allowed to be angry).

What I get wrong, which I think is very aspie - is I offend people when I don't mean to and I've got no idea how I did it or why they are offended. Unless someone explains it to me. I usually do know that I have offended the person - unless I'm not paying attention to them and I'm distracted by something else. I'm most likely to offend people and not notice in the middle of a (perceived) crisis, when I will become a dictator and yell orders with no please or thank-yous... Some people call this offending-others-without-knowing-why "lack of empathy" or "emotional insensitivity". I mostly call it "social incompetence".

My male dominated hobbies include sailing - small solo dinghies, and scuba diving, and computer stuff (also my profession). My main sport is field hockey - which is evenly mixed between the sexes in Australia. It can be violent, you have to be tough to play. I'd have played Aussie Rules football if my school had this when I started. I also umpire hockey - definitely more boys than girls do that.

Hiya, applesauce.

I'm 21, female and diagnosed, and I can't say for others but i'm quite high functioning, and have a crazy imagination. My creativity far outweighs my logic.

From my experience, what the person told you is true, although I can't speak for others.