Should I tell someone I have Autism?

Post Reply New Topic

Hey,

I can't decide if I should tell anyone that I have Autism. Part of me is kinda embarrassed and another part feels like I'm hiding who I really am.

Plus, I don't know how anyone would react. They could disregard it and think I'm just saying something random. They might not expect so much of me anymore. Or they might treat me like I'm stupid or something.

I've been asking my parents questions about when I was a kid (to diagnose myself more accurately) and their kinda wondering whats up.

What do you guys think?

I suppose it depends on who it is and the situation. If it isn't someone you know real well, I would advise against it. But, if it's a close friend or parents, then I'd be more inclined to say something. Hope that helps

Yeah, well.. I don't know my parents real well either. It's a pretty tough decision for me.

Here are the situations in which I disclose:
1. It's necessary to explain my behavior (which can't be explained away with "it's too loud" or "I'm bad with faces")
2. The other person is on the spectrum or close to someone who is (close as in spouse, sibling, parent, child)
3. It will serve the greater good (getting the word out that it's not a bad thing, or helping someone know how to interact around someone else)

Yeah, I really do want it as an excuse for why I am the way I am. Maybe it could take the pressure off to be like everyone wants me to be..

I've told a group of girls that I worked with a long time ago, that I was on the spectrum. They treated me worse, after I told them. They were trying to get me to dance and make animal noises. I didn't obey them. People are strange.

i told my mom she says your fine u just think 2 much

Haha, yeah. Sounds like something my mom or brother would say.

My dad, on the other hand, would probably take it to the extreme and sign me up for special classes or try and cure me by taking an assortment of vitamins and supplements.

I wish I could know how they'd react before I tell them..

You don't have to mention AS. You could say something like... "I find that I can think more clearly/feel less depressed/something good when I rock/pace/handflap, and I'd like you to respect that and stop pressuring me not to, because I'm not hurting anyone, and unless I'm out in public it doesn't really matter that it looks odd."

Actually, I don't have a problem with that. I can usually tell people that I'm cold and trying to warm up or something. Every now and then I need to pace though and it does annoy people. I have a bigger problem with making eye contact. I just listen better when I'm not looking or when I'm doing something else. It's like half of my brain needs to be distracted so it won't keep the other half from paying attention.

Why do you feel that they need to know? Just wondering. You're not hiding who you are. People mostly learn by observation anyway.

I used to be really ashamed of it and wouldn't tell anyone, but as I got older I grew to accept it a lot more and realise it's nothing to be embarrassed by. It's not something I tell everyone, but if it comes up in conversation then I'm not going to lie about it, it's just finding the right time to tell the person.

When I first told my boyfriend that I had AS (which was 6 years ago), my mothers reaction really annoyed me. She said I was stupid for telling him, that no-one would want to go out with me or be my friend if I went around telling people I had Aspergers because they'd think I'm weird.

I guess my parents never observed close enough. Plus, I don't think they know what Autism is. I asked my mom the other day when I said my first word and she said that I didn't start talking until much later then when my brother and sister did. And then she said that I just didn't need to talk because I always had someone there to take care of me.

What? That was her conclusion as to why I wasn't talking? Oh well, my mom has never been that bright anyways.. I'm just surprised my dad never noticed.

Well I told my brother but he still doesn't understand what I mean.

I hinted to my mom, she went and told my dad, he then tells me I don't have a disease. (Wanted to say autism isn't a disease....but instead went outside and sat in the rain and took a nap on the rug outside until my parents went to sleep. This occurred after he found out I was leaving my job. My reason was because they were going to fire me which turned out to be true, a few days later they said i could quit earlier than the 4 weeks time I had told them or I would be fired....naturally I took the early two weeks. His thoughts as to why I was quiting was because I thought people were being mean to me, not the case.)

The problem with saying you are autistic is most would think of the extreme and then look at you or someone else who is high functioning and wonder what you are talking about.

Honestly, this is something I am still debating about.

The more I come to understand aspergers the more it matches (Atleast with those on WP, and somewhat with those who right biographys about it.)

Most important thing is that you know whats going on, I JUST moved out of my parents house. This is partly due to me finding out I have aspergers, with that knowledge a lot of clarity about myself has been accomplished. However, what I am doing currently is purely a stroke of luck from the man up above- my rent is $100 right now.... I am renting a room with my brother and two other guys, its a tiny room about the size of an air stream. The bed is located in the ceiling, I don't have a bed yet. So things aren't perfect but I love this little room, though it's dirty and dusty (Working on that...) it does have a lock and I love the solitude I have been afforded. This is only going to last a year though so I have alot of thinking to do and need to take full advantage of this opportunity.