What would you like in an Autistic Group? SURVEY

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A couple of friends and I are creating a local autistic group in our city and we need your help! Being on the autistic spectrum your input is invaluable. Please take a few minutes to fill out this short survey and let us know what you would like from an autistic group:

https://spreadsheets.google.com/viewfor ... ai0xV3c6MQ

Thank You!

Alternatively, if you do not wish to take the survey or wish to add things that were not included in the survey, you can just post in this thread.

I am sorry I didn't take the survey---just a little overwhelming today to do it. But, I want to add a thought. Please recommend "respect" in the group. I believe being respectful is about the most important trait a person can practice. If someone has a differing view, it can be discussed, but in a respectful manner. I see so many insulting comments on WP that it gets frustrating. Please let your group be a wonderful experience. But you have a challenge. I feel you will be respectful, but will the members learn to be respectful if they are not already respectful. Perhaps discussions of how to be respectful would be good. Thank you for allowing suggestions on this thread.

That is one of the most respectful WP posts I've read. Thank you for the response. Respect is essential and something that can often take extra care and thought. Folk on the spectrum can sometimes, inadvertently, come across terse. We will most definitely think of how respect will be encouraged, integrated and maintained within our local community.

Check out the link in my sig for an example of how an AS group can be run. My single biggest suggestion is to not try and make things too structured, I didn't really start getting much in the way of a response until I switched from a support group/discussion forum to social group. It seemed that what the AS community really wanted was a safe place to safe place to be themselves and socialize with other Aspies.

guess i could never belong to a group even though i think it would really help me in that i have so little human contact. when someone writes about animal abuse and says it's ok or they're just dumb animals, well i'm not going to just let it slide by. that writer has lost my respect and earned my derision. when someone makes fun of the abuse i suffered as a child, they lose my respect. they lose more than that. both of these things have happened on wp.

so no groups for me. i do not....just 'take it'. that's what the germans did when the nazi's took over. rolling on your back and exposing your belly may work for dogs, but the tougher human will stab you in the heart.

have fun at your groups. you're sure to have no conflict if you stick to discussing 'disney movies'.

I've only attended my local AS group once, but I would have been too overwhelmed to go if it hadn't been structured. There was a topic of discussion and a leader, and people would raise their hands to give their input. I was too shy and awkward to participate even so, but it was interesting to listen and I felt I would want to come back. The leader was very aware of making sure she gave everyone an opportunity to speak if they chose to.

After the formal discussion the group broke up and people stayed to chat among themselves, and I left immediately, because the thought of chatting casually was too overwhelming for me. I've been meaning to go back but I've always been too anxious.

I'm not sure how that can be translated into advice for starting a group, except to say that maybe you can combine both structure and casual conversation. It might be nice too to have planned activities, or games, like Scrabble.

Our group is on Meetup as well! We are undergoing some major changes and developments lately. Most of the suggestions from group members are similar to your suggestion of creating a safe social autistic environment. Member attendance is what we struggle with the most. The group regulars always show and have a good time and we want more autistics to be able to experience a welcoming environment.

Our current group has had some good political discussions and debates. We're human beings not cartoon characters. hehe Thank you for reminding us not to loose sight of the bigger picture by being caught up in the details. Groups aren't for everyone and a group can't be everything to everyone either.

Hehe, now I'm singing Florence and the Machine: Kiss with a Fist

This is good advice and an area that is currently providing some light strife amongst our members. Hopefully our members can provide each other with a regular scheduled and structured meetup for like minded individuals who prefer this type of environment while other members can organize the more spontaneous and free flowing meetups for folk who prefer those. Not having an entirely hierarchal structure might help in the respect that different people can host different events that are more particular to their interests.

A safe place for aspies to be themselves, with more of a focus on themselves, than on their families.

*raises a glass* "here, here"

I've had really good luck with a "no pressure no obligation" attendance policy to let people dip their toes into the group experience without feeling any anxiety about think they'll be singled out or forced to participate in anything. My group has also gotten big enough that we're starting to "franchise" out a bit by helping members start Square Peg chapters in their areas and providing the planning and early logistics. We're mulling over the idea of several sub groups that meet at other times, such as a single's group and a more structured support group, but progress is slow.

There was another group that I belonged to for a while that was very structured, with capped membership, a multi-state application process, a 6 page rule book and mandatory attendance. It was OK, but the rules got to be a bit much and eventually the founder sort of had a long term slow motion meltdown and the group fell apart, though I was able to help most of the members find their way to the Square Pegs.

Another thing that has worked really well for me was expanding the scope of my group beyond diagnosed Aspies, to people that have all/most of the symptoms but may not even know about AS. I did a few posts on craigslist about my social club for people that don't fit it, and described a snapshot of a typical Aspie. It's been really surprising how many of the people that responded have eventually sought and obtained diagnosis when they came in just thinking they were weird and didn't fit in, it's pretty cool.