Just some problems i want to share..jumbled up sorry

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I find it extremely difficult to write stuff down that i am thinking of. I'm getting to the point where i'm thinking i don't jsut have aspergers/autism, but something else. i'm really forgetful and i would just sit and stare at my monitor like i have a really bad thinking impairment or something. even now i'm getting confused on what to put down. Argh!

i'm one that feels really sorry for my self. If im telling my mum something that is about me that isn't very positive like "i just feel like im not gonna do anything with my life" or "i didn't hear what u just said" my tone of voice is soft and like im on the verge of crying. Maybe it's just depression and anxiety taking over my life i don't know..there's just something in my mind that just puts things on hold and avoids simple things at all costs. I struggled to go to the doctors today and ask for an appointment with my GP. I'm really paranoid that i have schizophrenia or something. I just have really bad mood swings and i think im something that worries me and that just gets me down for the day.

I'm scared to go to see my GP because i've got other problems with my weight (too skinny), anxiety, i think i have dyslexia..overall im a bit of a hipercondriate (spelling)

I can understand words but when i read a sentence and go to another, i immedietly forgot what that says. really bad short term memory loss. I do/say/type things in the wrong order too.

I'm in a right old mess, i don't know if i want advice or just to get this all off my chest

I can relate to being unable to get my thoughts together sometimes like to answer a post. Sometimes I will read something and try and answer and just can't seem to get my ideas together enough to make sense the way I want it too. I think it helps sometimes to come back and try again. Although last night I was up until about 5am because I was thinking over ideas again and again. It was silly really because I wanted to go to sleep but yet still doing this to try and better focus my thoughts.

I have not been formally diagnosed with AS, but have been with depression, chronic depression, different anxiety issues, sensory issues, OCD. And I was evaluated for an eating disorder one time but that was more related to the sensory issues and not something like anorexia.

Hey Baz,

I can relate to almost all things you stated. I have trouble, sometimes big trouble, sometimes less, in writing words down, because I can’t spell out my thoughts. I suppose it is because I don’t think in words - although I can’t believe some people really would think in words? Sounds weird to me! For me the same with speaking of course, I have like… one or two teachers who actually thought I’m quite a genius and about 30 (changed school a lot!) who think I’m brain-dead and tell me so...

I can do maths, but I can’t do arithmetic even if my life depended on it, you know. I also can’t keep a number in mind for more than a few seconds. If my mom tells me I need to get the keys when we’re ready to life and I run back into my room, I stand in the doorway and don’t know why I was going there in the first place.

My issue is, that my head is so full or concentrating on something most of the time, I have trouble keeping up with my surroundings and lose thoughts about everything and everyone no matter whether they‘re of importance or no importance. I know exactly what to do but then I have to convert it into words and feel like I don’t know anything at all and am downright stupid. Can you relate any to that maybe? The only way to make it better is going out/to my room where I can relax in peace and far away from anything. It doesn't cure the problem though, but it helps from getting too frustrated and depressed. Does it work any for you?
I have no idea what is it with me though, I’m suspecting Asperger mostly because of my sensory problems and needed routine but who knows.

i didnt finish my music course atcollege because i found the assignments too hard. i cannot write in length about a single subject alone. i tried to get help but they didnt help me out that much with it.ern though i know alot about
i did a 3000 word essay on th history of the drum kit, whcih im very proud of now b ecause it took me a long time and i had alot more assistance to do this essay and i got a distiction. evene though i know alot about the drums and the history of the drums, (whjch is why i chose this as a subject) i still needed alot of help to fit my work together to it made sense.
at the end of it it still didnt look like verybody elses essays. mine had alot more bullet points, and changes in it where other peoples tended to flow through. but i still got the mark i wanted so im happy..... just sad i never got to finish to course